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MANCHESTER BOY · 7th February 2006, 19:53

Why is it called PMS? -- Because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken

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Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been."

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A woman went to a doctor and said , doctor, I have a problem. every time I sneeze I have an orgasm. the doctor said, oh really, what have you been doing for it. the woman replied, snorting pepper.

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To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

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I married my wife for her looks...but not the ones she's been giving me lately!

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I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life

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I have a frog in the back
A woman is shopping for a pet as a gift for her husband, but she is concerned that the prices that the Pet Shop are charging are very high. She goes to the clerk and explains her concern. "Well, I have a frog in the back that I can let you have for $50," the clerk says. "$50?" the woman replies. "That seems terribly expensive for a frog."

"Well, this frog is worth it. It's been trained to give blow jobs."

The woman is stunned, but because her husband loves this sort of sex, and because she is not particularly fond of it, she decides the frog might be a good investment. She buys the frog, brings it home, presents it to her husband, and explains its special value. The husband is skeptical, but promises he'll give the frog a try that night. The woman goes to sleep happily knowing she won't be
bothered by her husband that night.

She is suddenly awakened by a clatter coming from the kitchen. She goes downstairs and finds the frog and her husband pulling out pots and pans and poring over cookbooks.

"What are you two doing down here?" she asks. Her husband responds, "If I can teach this frog to cook, you're out of here!"

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I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?

7th February 2006, 19:53	#18 (permalink)
MANCHESTER BOY Banned Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Barely old enough to smoke... Posts: 3,712	Why is it called PMS? -- Because "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A woman went to a doctor and said , doctor, I have a problem. every time I sneeze I have an orgasm. the doctor said, oh really, what have you been doing for it. the woman replied, snorting pepper. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I married my wife for her looks...but not the ones she's been giving me lately! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I have a frog in the back A woman is shopping for a pet as a gift for her husband, but she is concerned that the prices that the Pet Shop are charging are very high. She goes to the clerk and explains her concern. "Well, I have a frog in the back that I can let you have for $50," the clerk says. "$50?" the woman replies. "That seems terribly expensive for a frog." "Well, this frog is worth it. It's been trained to give blow jobs." The woman is stunned, but because her husband loves this sort of sex, and because she is not particularly fond of it, she decides the frog might be a good investment. She buys the frog, brings it home, presents it to her husband, and explains its special value. The husband is skeptical, but promises he'll give the frog a try that night. The woman goes to sleep happily knowing she won't be bothered by her husband that night. She is suddenly awakened by a clatter coming from the kitchen. She goes downstairs and finds the frog and her husband pulling out pots and pans and poring over cookbooks. "What are you two doing down here?" she asks. Her husband responds, "If I can teach this frog to cook, you're out of here!" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it. I said, 'Thyroid problem?