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May have been posted before, can't be botherd to check:
A van driver used to amuse himself by running over every Gooner he would see strutting down the side of the road in their crappy old red and white shirts.
He would swerve to hit them and there would be a loud "THUMP" and then he would swerve back on the road.
One day, as the driver was driving along, he saw a priest hitchhiking. He thought he would do a good turn and pulled the van over. He asked the Priest "where are you going, Father?"
"I'm going to say mass at St. Joseph's church, about 2 miles down the road" replied the priest.
"No problem Father. I'll give you a lift. Climb in!" The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the van continued down the road.
Suddenly the driver saw a Gooner walking down the road and instinctively swerved to hit him. But, just in time, he remembered the bloody priest, so at the last minute he swerved back to the road, narrowly missing the dingle.
However even though he was certain he missed him, he still heard a loud "THUD." Not understanding where the noise came from, he glanced in his mirrors and when he didn't see anything he turned to the priest and said "I'm sorry Father, I almost hit that Gooner."
"That's okay," replied the priest. "I got the idiot with the door!"
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