Originally Posted by zing

So one atom says to another atom, "Hey, I've lost an electron." The other atom says "Are you sure?". The original atom says "Yeah, I'm positive."

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A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. When he asks the bartender how much is, the bartender says, "For you, no charge!"

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Heisenberg is driving along and is pulled over by a cop. The cop asks him, "Do you know how fast you were going?" and he replies, "No, but I knew exactly where I am!"