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That's exactly the same as mine, except that your 'C' words aren't very close to your 'A'. 26 is a bit ambiguous about this, but the similarity of 'twat' to 'Stan' adds a definite punchiness which is lacking in yours. Also, I forgot to mention, the person's name should come at the end and ideally in the same place at the beginning, i.e.
.......Name........Name
.............................
..................
..........
...Name
Also, yours doesn't scan, unless you put the emphasis on the 'ant' syllable of 'elegantly', which sounds rubbish.
Good try though otherwise
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