Premier League Defenders Unimpressed by Torres

UnitedRoadRed · 5th June 2008, 13:25

When asked about his Iberian chum's first season in English football, Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho replied, "Who? Ah, that chap that Terry left in loads of space like some spastic English defenders do? Ah yes, I took hold of him in extra time because JT thought his image was suffering a bit. I borrowed Rio's pocket and placed the dainty little chap in it. Not sure why Rio leant it me before the second leg, but it all became clear at that point. Oh, by the way Clive, is it true that he's related to Kevin Phillips and he'll disappear without a trace next season?"

England's best defender was also asked about the Spanish phenomenon. "That's a steroid, innit?" quipped Rio. "Nah, seriously mate, not a clue who he is. Found something small and red with a yellow top in my pocket after half an hour and thought, yeah, it's bringing me luck, clean sheet so far, so I left it there, innit." When asked about the match at Old Trafford, the future England captain replied, "funny, I found another one of them doll things but this one was white with a yellow top. I kept it and same again, a clean sheet."

French defender Willie Gallas, when asked why Torres couldn't score against Arsenal, toed the party line with a fairly unambiguous "I did not see him."

botond · 5th June 2008, 13:42

link ?

KeyserSoze · 5th June 2008, 13:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

Its some kind of WUM in response to the Torres comments... i think

Redlambs · 5th June 2008, 13:47

No doubt they are unimpressed, he's a little girl playing football! I thought there were rules about that.

Eto'odinho · 5th June 2008, 13:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnitedRoadRed

When asked about his Iberian chum's first season in English football, Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho replied, "Who? Ah, that chap that Terry left in loads of space like some spastic English defenders do? Ah yes, I took hold of him in extra time because JT thought his image was suffering a bit. I borrowed Rio's pocket and placed the dainty little chap in it. Not sure why Rio leant it me before the second leg, but it all became clear at that point. Oh, by the way Clive, is it true that he's related to Kevin Phillips and he'll disappear without a trace next season?"

England's best defender was also asked about the Spanish phenomenon. "That's a steroid, innit?" quipped Rio. "Nah, seriously mate, not a clue who he is. Found something small and red with a yellow top in my pocket after half an hour and thought, yeah, it's bringing me luck, clean sheet so far, so I left it there, innit." When asked about the match at Old Trafford, the future England captain replied, "funny, I found another one of them doll things but this one was white with a yellow top. I kept it and same again, a clean sheet."

French defender Willie Gallas, when asked why Torres couldn't score against Arsenal, toed the party line with a fairly unambiguous "I did not see him."

Eto'odinho · 5th June 2008, 13:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

Partizan · 5th June 2008, 14:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by Keyzer Soze

Its some kind of WUM in response to the Torres comments... i think

I know, sickening is'nt it.

Chris H · 6th June 2008, 10:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnitedRoadRed

When asked about his Iberian chum's first season in English football, Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho replied, "Who? Ah, that chap that Terry left in loads of space like some spastic English defenders do? Ah yes, I took hold of him in extra time because JT thought his image was suffering a bit. I borrowed Rio's pocket and placed the dainty little chap in it. Not sure why Rio leant it me before the second leg, but it all became clear at that point. Oh, by the way Clive, is it true that he's related to Kevin Phillips and he'll disappear without a trace next season?"

England's best defender was also asked about the Spanish phenomenon. "That's a steroid, innit?" quipped Rio. "Nah, seriously mate, not a clue who he is. Found something small and red with a yellow top in my pocket after half an hour and thought, yeah, it's bringing me luck, clean sheet so far, so I left it there, innit." When asked about the match at Old Trafford, the future England captain replied, "funny, I found another one of them doll things but this one was white with a yellow top. I kept it and same again, a clean sheet."

French defender Willie Gallas, when asked why Torres couldn't score against Arsenal, toed the party line with a fairly unambiguous "I did not see him."

Not bad, not bad at all. Well done.

spinoza · 6th June 2008, 11:13

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnitedRoadRed

When asked about his Iberian chum's first season in English football, Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho replied, "Who? Ah, that chap that Terry left in loads of space like some spastic English defenders do? Ah yes, I took hold of him in extra time because JT thought his image was suffering a bit. I borrowed Rio's pocket and placed the dainty little chap in it. Not sure why Rio leant it me before the second leg, but it all became clear at that point. Oh, by the way Clive, is it true that he's related to Kevin Phillips and he'll disappear without a trace next season?"

England's best defender was also asked about the Spanish phenomenon. "That's a steroid, innit?" quipped Rio. "Nah, seriously mate, not a clue who he is. Found something small and red with a yellow top in my pocket after half an hour and thought, yeah, it's bringing me luck, clean sheet so far, so I left it there, innit." When asked about the match at Old Trafford, the future England captain replied, "funny, I found another one of them doll things but this one was white with a yellow top. I kept it and same again, a clean sheet."

French defender Willie Gallas, when asked why Torres couldn't score against Arsenal, toed the party line with a fairly unambiguous "I did not see him."

McLovin · 6th June 2008, 11:15

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnitedRoadRed

When asked about his Iberian chum's first season in English football, Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho replied, "Who? Ah, that chap that Terry left in loads of space like some spastic English defenders do? Ah yes, I took hold of him in extra time because JT thought his image was suffering a bit. I borrowed Rio's pocket and placed the dainty little chap in it. Not sure why Rio leant it me before the second leg, but it all became clear at that point. Oh, by the way Clive, is it true that he's related to Kevin Phillips and he'll disappear without a trace next season?"

England's best defender was also asked about the Spanish phenomenon. "That's a steroid, innit?" quipped Rio. "Nah, seriously mate, not a clue who he is. Found something small and red with a yellow top in my pocket after half an hour and thought, yeah, it's bringing me luck, clean sheet so far, so I left it there, innit." When asked about the match at Old Trafford, the future England captain replied, "funny, I found another one of them doll things but this one was white with a yellow top. I kept it and same again, a clean sheet."

French defender Willie Gallas, when asked why Torres couldn't score against Arsenal, toed the party line with a fairly unambiguous "I did not see him."

032Devil · 6th June 2008, 11:37

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

Have you read the 1st post?

Raven_Blade · 6th June 2008, 16:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnitedRoadRed

When asked about his Iberian chum's first season in English football, Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho replied, "Who? Ah, that chap that Terry left in loads of space like some spastic English defenders do? Ah yes, I took hold of him in extra time because JT thought his image was suffering a bit. I borrowed Rio's pocket and placed the dainty little chap in it. Not sure why Rio leant it me before the second leg, but it all became clear at that point. Oh, by the way Clive, is it true that he's related to Kevin Phillips and he'll disappear without a trace next season?"

England's best defender was also asked about the Spanish phenomenon. "That's a steroid, innit?" quipped Rio. "Nah, seriously mate, not a clue who he is. Found something small and red with a yellow top in my pocket after half an hour and thought, yeah, it's bringing me luck, clean sheet so far, so I left it there, innit." When asked about the match at Old Trafford, the future England captain replied, "funny, I found another one of them doll things but this one was white with a yellow top. I kept it and same again, a clean sheet."

French defender Willie Gallas, when asked why Torres couldn't score against Arsenal, toed the party line with a fairly unambiguous "I did not see him."

IBleedRed · 6th June 2008, 16:28

spot on

I found torres' comments pretty arrogant considering how bad rio owned him and he didnt seem to think it was important

DiaboliQue · 6th June 2008, 23:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

fucking hell

PeteReDevil · 7th June 2008, 01:29

took a little while for me to sink down though.

WeWonItTwoTimes · 7th June 2008, 02:03

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

reddevilcanada · 7th June 2008, 02:08

reddevilcanada · 7th June 2008, 02:08

btw, how many goals did Torres score in the league AWAY from anfield?

UnitedRoadRed · 7th June 2008, 11:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by reddevilcanada

btw, how many goals did Torres score in the league AWAY from anfield?

Three; one against the might of Derby, one against Boro and one in the last day dead rubber against Spurs. I can feel a new survey coming on.

Dippersripper · 7th June 2008, 12:13

Quote:

Originally Posted by reddevilcanada

btw, how many goals did Torres score in the league AWAY from anfield?

2 or 3 I think

Dippersripper · 7th June 2008, 12:16

Great wind up

kishankhagram · 7th June 2008, 12:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

jasonrh · 8th June 2008, 09:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by UnitedRoadRed

Three; one against the might of Derby, one against Boro and one in the last day dead rubber against Spurs. I can feel a new survey coming on.

He was relegated in the English Scoring Away Goals Premier League.

Chorley1974 · 8th June 2008, 10:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

Brwned · 8th June 2008, 10:47

Quote:

Originally Posted by botond

link ?

5th June 2008, 13:25	#1 (permalink)
UnitedRoadRed Reserve Team Player Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Manchester Posts: 2,097	Premier League Defenders Unimpressed by Torres When asked about his Iberian chum's first season in English football, Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho replied, "Who? Ah, that chap that Terry left in loads of space like some spastic English defenders do? Ah yes, I took hold of him in extra time because JT thought his image was suffering a bit. I borrowed Rio's pocket and placed the dainty little chap in it. Not sure why Rio leant it me before the second leg, but it all became clear at that point. Oh, by the way Clive, is it true that he's related to Kevin Phillips and he'll disappear without a trace next season?" England's best defender was also asked about the Spanish phenomenon. "That's a steroid, innit?" quipped Rio. "Nah, seriously mate, not a clue who he is. Found something small and red with a yellow top in my pocket after half an hour and thought, yeah, it's bringing me luck, clean sheet so far, so I left it there, innit." When asked about the match at Old Trafford, the future England captain replied, "funny, I found another one of them doll things but this one was white with a yellow top. I kept it and same again, a clean sheet." French defender Willie Gallas, when asked why Torres couldn't score against Arsenal, toed the party line with a fairly unambiguous "I did not see him."

5th June 2008, 13:42	#2 (permalink)
botond Reserve Team Player Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 3,222	link ?

5th June 2008, 13:47	#4 (permalink)
Redlambs First Team Sub Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: Be careful what you reply, unless you want to be drawn with Carragher's cock up your arse... Posts: 7,503	No doubt they are unimpressed, he's a little girl playing football! I thought there were rules about that.

6th June 2008, 16:28	#13 (permalink)
IBleedRed likes to use pantyhose Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: apparently uses the term "limey" too much Posts: 4,201	spot on I found torres' comments pretty arrogant considering how bad rio owned him and he didnt seem to think it was important

7th June 2008, 01:29	#15 (permalink)
PeteReDevil Reserve Team Player Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: I....declare...BANKRUPTCYYYY!!! Posts: 1,205	took a little while for me to sink down though.

7th June 2008, 02:08	#17 (permalink)
reddevilcanada First Team Sub Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 9,868

7th June 2008, 02:08	#18 (permalink)
reddevilcanada First Team Sub Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 9,868	btw, how many goals did Torres score in the league AWAY from anfield?

7th June 2008, 12:16	#21 (permalink)
Dippersripper Educating ignorant bastards about God to achieve a near-perfect world Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: No more wumming Posts: 8,419	Great wind up