Sing a song about Fernando Torres

TheRedFlag · 16th May 2008, 21:00

Heard this one against West Ham - to the tune of "Keano's fucking magic".

"oohhh, they haven't won the title,
for 18 fucking years,
so they signed a wanker,
who looks like Britney Spears,
a trip to Moscow beckoned,
they ordered him a visa,
until the goal was scored,
by Johnny Arne Riise"

It amused me greatly

GAngel · 16th May 2008, 21:09

class

TheRedPirate · 16th May 2008, 21:14

He said he wanted to be a red, Torres, Torres.
He turned us down instead we signed TEVEZ, TEVEZ
Now he's playing for the scouse
When he's away they'll rob his house
Fernando Torres Liverpools full of crime!

Saw it in another thread. Class

MUFCgal · 16th May 2008, 22:47

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRedPirate

He said he wanted to be a red, Torres, Torres.
He turned us down instead we signed TEVEZ, TEVEZ
Now he's playing for the scouse
When he's away they'll rob his house
Fernando Torres Liverpools full of crime!

Saw it in another thread. Class

Yeah, that's mine

MUFCgal · 16th May 2008, 23:08

There was something in the air that night
The medals were bright, Fernando
They were shining not for you, but me
Nor Stevie G, Fernando
But we never think that we will lose
You'll have regret
If you had to do the same again
Would you, Spanish doll, Fernando.

(to the chorus of Fernando by Abba)

TheRedPirate · 16th May 2008, 23:16

Nice one.

GE · 16th May 2008, 23:37

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRedFlag

Heard this one against West Ham - to the tune of "Keano's fucking magic".

"oohhh, they haven't won the title,
for 18 fucking years,
so they signed a wanker,
who looks like Britney Spears,
a trip to Moscow beckoned,
they ordered him a visa,
until the goal was scored,
by Johnny Arne Riise"

It amused me greatly

That NEEDS to be sung at all our games next season.

Diabo_Sam · 16th May 2008, 23:39

Torres: What have I done?

Steev · 16th May 2008, 23:54

"Spaniard in the Wind"

And it seems to me you ruined your life
When you signed for Liverpool (or perhaps "Like a Spaniard in the Bins" is better, thinking about it)
Never knowing, who to pass to,
Kuyt or Voronin?
We would've liked to have signed you
But you were just a kid
You're wasting all the goals you score
In a league you'll never win

Domino · 16th May 2008, 23:57

the first one is boylies i think

class song

Plechazunga · 17th May 2008, 00:05

Can you hear the drums, Fernando?
No you can’t, because your ears are half a mile down the road...
It was beautiful, Fernando
How the heady fumes rose skyward, how the makeshift altar glowed,
What a shame you missed the bang, I guess that’s how it is when you yourself explode...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted all that paraffin
On Voronin,
Fernando

Can you see the moon, Fernando?
No you can’t, because your eyeballs have shot up to such a height...
And your pupils fried, Fernando,
And your retinas were shattered in the furnace, shining bright
And your optic nerves were scattered in the blackness of the sacrificial night...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted all that lighter fuel
On Harry Kewell,
Fernando

Can you smell the breeze, Fernando?
No you can't, your nose went shooting like a bullet from a gun...
And your limbs fell off, Fernando
'Till the only thing remaining was your torso, lying dumb
Like a grim, macabre reminder of the foolishness of signing for the Scum...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted so much dynamite
On Crouch and Kuyt,
Fernando

Steev · 17th May 2008, 00:15

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plechazunga

Can you hear the drums, Fernando?
No you can’t, because your ears are half a mile down the road...
It was beautiful, Fernando
How the heady fumes rose skyward, how the makeshift altar glowed,
What a shame you missed the bang, I guess that’s how it is when you yourself explode...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted all that paraffin
On Voronin,
Fernando

Can you see the moon, Fernando?
No you can’t, because your eyeballs have shot up to such a height...
And your pupils fried, Fernando,
And your retinas were shattered in the furnace, shining bright
And your optic nerves were scattered in the blackness of the sacrificial night...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted all that lighter fuel
On Harry Kewell,
Fernando

Can you smell the breeze, Fernando?
No you can't, your nose went shooting like a bullet from a gun...
And your limbs fell off, Fernando
'Till the only thing remaining was your torso, lying dumb
Like a grim, macabre reminder of the foolishness of signing for the Scum...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted so much dynamite
On Crouch and Kuyt,
Fernando

Better than my attempt. You bastard.

Spammy · 17th May 2008, 01:11

Kate Gash - Foundations

Your goals have papered over
The cracks in our foundations
But you'll never walk alone
I'll bet.

You scored the most since Ruud
Your purchase now seems shrewd
Yet you'll never get the respect
Of Mancs.

But they must eat so many lemons
Coz they are so bitter
24 League goals mate

Stick that up your shitter.

MikeUpNorth · 17th May 2008, 01:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spammy

Kate Gash - Foundations

Your goals have papered over
The cracks in our foundations
But you'll never walk alone
I'll bet.

You scored the most since Ruud
Your purchase now seems shrewd
Yet you'll never get the respect
Of Mancs.

But they must eat so many lemons
Coz they are so bitter
24 League goals mate

Stick that up your shitter.

Nice comeback.

Pancho123 · 17th May 2008, 13:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Steev

"Spaniard in the Wind"

And it seems to me you ruined your life
When you signed for Liverpool
Never knowing, who to pass to,
Kuyt or Voronin?
We would've liked to have signed you
But you were just a kid
You're wasting all the goals you score
In a league you'll never win

My favourite, just for the hurtful, truthful last line!!! hahaha!! Love it!!

ThatOldRedMagic · 17th May 2008, 13:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plechazunga

Can you hear the drums, Fernando?
No you can’t, because your ears are half a mile down the road...
It was beautiful, Fernando
How the heady fumes rose skyward, how the makeshift altar glowed,
What a shame you missed the bang, I guess that’s how it is when you yourself explode...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted all that paraffin
On Voronin,
Fernando

Can you see the moon, Fernando?
No you can’t, because your eyeballs have shot up to such a height...
And your pupils fried, Fernando,
And your retinas were shattered in the furnace, shining bright
And your optic nerves were scattered in the blackness of the sacrificial night...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted all that lighter fuel
On Harry Kewell,
Fernando

Can you smell the breeze, Fernando?
No you can't, your nose went shooting like a bullet from a gun...
And your limbs fell off, Fernando
'Till the only thing remaining was your torso, lying dumb
Like a grim, macabre reminder of the foolishness of signing for the Scum...

There was something in your hair that night
‘Twas dynamite
Fernando
I had stuffed it in your Alice band
A match in hand (

)
Fernando

Though there’s little left of you to see,
I’ve one regret...
That I wasted so much dynamite
On Crouch and Kuyt,
Fernando

Well re-cycled Plech! (but still wicked; what ARE you on buddy?)

Utd heap · 17th May 2008, 14:03

You're all obsessed with the girly pratt!

Plechazunga · 17th May 2008, 14:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThatOldRedMagic

Well re-cycled Plech! (but still wicked; what ARE you on buddy?)

Cheers... I added another verse. It's not as good.

Murphman · 18th May 2008, 07:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRedFlag

Heard this one against West Ham - to the tune of "Keano's fucking magic".

"oohhh, they haven't won the title,
for 18 fucking years,
so they signed a wanker,
who looks like Britney Spears,
a trip to Moscow beckoned,
they ordered him a visa,
until the goal was scored,
by Johnny Arne Riise"

It amused me greatly

16th May 2008, 21:00	#1 (permalink)
TheRedFlag Not feeling himself tonight Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: E335 Row 31 Posts: 10,272	Sing a song about Fernando Torres Heard this one against West Ham - to the tune of "Keano's fucking magic". "oohhh, they haven't won the title, for 18 fucking years, so they signed a wanker, who looks like Britney Spears, a trip to Moscow beckoned, they ordered him a visa, until the goal was scored, by Johnny Arne Riise" It amused me greatly

17th May 2008, 00:05	#11 (permalink)
Plechazunga Phones, soup, paint and chairs are troubling. Join Date: May 2003 Location: My enthusiasm is the same. I love this club. It is not about brochures. Posts: 49,497	Can you hear the drums, Fernando? No you can’t, because your ears are half a mile down the road... It was beautiful, Fernando How the heady fumes rose skyward, how the makeshift altar glowed, What a shame you missed the bang, I guess that’s how it is when you yourself explode... There was something in your hair that night ‘Twas dynamite Fernando I had stuffed it in your Alice band A match in hand () Fernando Though there’s little left of you to see, I’ve one regret... That I wasted all that paraffin On Voronin, Fernando Can you see the moon, Fernando? No you can’t, because your eyeballs have shot up to such a height... And your pupils fried, Fernando, And your retinas were shattered in the furnace, shining bright And your optic nerves were scattered in the blackness of the sacrificial night... There was something in your hair that night ‘Twas dynamite Fernando I had stuffed it in your Alice band A match in hand () Fernando Though there’s little left of you to see, I’ve one regret... That I wasted all that lighter fuel On Harry Kewell, Fernando Can you smell the breeze, Fernando? No you can't, your nose went shooting like a bullet from a gun... And your limbs fell off, Fernando 'Till the only thing remaining was your torso, lying dumb Like a grim, macabre reminder of the foolishness of signing for the Scum... There was something in your hair that night ‘Twas dynamite Fernando I had stuffed it in your Alice band A match in hand () Fernando Though there’s little left of you to see, I’ve one regret... That I wasted so much dynamite On Crouch and Kuyt, Fernando

16th May 2008, 21:09	#2 (permalink)
GAngel Reserve Team Player Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 1,370	class

16th May 2008, 21:14	#3 (permalink)
TheRedPirate Reserve Team Player Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: UK Posts: 1,425	He said he wanted to be a red, Torres, Torres. He turned us down instead we signed TEVEZ, TEVEZ Now he's playing for the scouse When he's away they'll rob his house Fernando Torres Liverpools full of crime! Saw it in another thread. Class

16th May 2008, 23:08	#5 (permalink)
MUFCgal Reserve Team Player Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Belfast,Northern Ireland Posts: 3,135	There was something in the air that night The medals were bright, Fernando They were shining not for you, but me Nor Stevie G, Fernando But we never think that we will lose You'll have regret If you had to do the same again Would you, Spanish doll, Fernando. (to the chorus of Fernando by Abba)

16th May 2008, 23:16	#6 (permalink)
TheRedPirate Reserve Team Player Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: UK Posts: 1,425	Nice one.

16th May 2008, 23:39	#8 (permalink)
Diabo_Sam Reserve Team Player Join Date: May 2007 Location: Carrick's our Unknown Soldier. Posts: 1,779	Torres: What have I done?

16th May 2008, 23:54	#9 (permalink)
Steev Reserve Team Player Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: off the grid Posts: 2,169	"Spaniard in the Wind" And it seems to me you ruined your life When you signed for Liverpool (or perhaps "Like a Spaniard in the Bins" is better, thinking about it) Never knowing, who to pass to, Kuyt or Voronin? We would've liked to have signed you But you were just a kid You're wasting all the goals you score In a league you'll never win

16th May 2008, 23:57	#10 (permalink)
Domino Reserve Team Player Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: London Posts: 895	the first one is boylies i think class song

17th May 2008, 01:11	#13 (permalink)
Spammy Struggling to make the reserves Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Yeah? Posts: 11,439	Kate Gash - Foundations Your goals have papered over The cracks in our foundations But you'll never walk alone I'll bet. You scored the most since Ruud Your purchase now seems shrewd Yet you'll never get the respect Of Mancs. But they must eat so many lemons Coz they are so bitter 24 League goals mate Stick that up your shitter.

17th May 2008, 14:03	#17 (permalink)
Utd heap Last Man Standing (joint) Champion 2008 Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: London, mostly. Manchester, matchdays. Posts: 6,608	You're all obsessed with the girly pratt!