Top 10 Best Dives

MrMarcello

Old article but good read; no doubt a few of these would be replaced with some of crap dives in recent years. Apologies if this has been posted before.

http://observer.guardian.co.uk/osm/s...072648,00.html

The 10...
...best football dives

Sunday November 2, 2003
Observer Sport Monthly


1: Roberto Rojas
Brazil v Chile, World Cup qualifier, 3 September 1989
Overrun and intimidated, Chile needed a way out. The plan: force an abandonment and a replay in a neutral venue. The execution: on 69 minutes, goalkeeper Rojas threw himself into the smoke of a firecracker, which had landed nearby, pulled a razor blade from his glove and stabbed himself in the head. The result: lots of blood, a mass brawl, a walkout, an abandonment - but, after video evidence, no replay. Instead, Brazil were awarded the game, Chile were out of one World Cup and excluded from the next, Rojas was banned for life and the woman who threw the firecracker was signed up by Playboy Brazil. In May 2001, Fifa lifted the ban. 'At 43, I'm unlikely to play again,' said Rojas, now coach at São Paulo, 'but at least this pardon will cleanse my soul.'

2: Jurgen Klinsmann
West Germany v Argentina, World Cup Final, 8 July 1990
Germany had no answer to Argentina's solid, anti-football until Klinsmann collected the ball on the right and tried to go past Pedro Monzon. Monzon was lining something up - a tackle, perhaps even a foul - but before he'd had a chance, Klinsmann was soaring above him. Arcing through the air, he broke into three jarring, electric rolls. He'd done enough to see Monzon sent off - the first red card in a World Cup Final. Germany won with a penalty, awarded following a late Rudi Völler air trip.

3: Diego Simeone
Argentina v England, World Cup, 30 June 1998

Before he was deified, David Beckham was a sack hanging from lamp posts. He owed his unpopularity to Diego Simeone, who, flicked by Becks's back heel in retaliation after a foul, toppled theatrically in this World Cup last-16 match in Saint-Etienne. 'I took advantage,' Simeone told OSM in May last year. 'I think anyone would have done so in just the same way.' Beckham was naturally unimpressed. 'Simeone went down as if he'd been shot,' he said. 'My first thought was, "I've made a big mistake here."'

4: Robbie Savage
Derby v Leicester, 15 September 2001

Robbie makes it so high in the list for sheer effort: a corrosive 90 minutes, a last-minute dive in the area, a hopeful look to the referee and a fist-pumping explosion in front of the home fans. Derby players chased him all the way to the corner flag, then tried to mug him in the tunnel afterwards. 'We've seen players for years who are very clever at diving for penalties,' said Derby boss Jim Smith. 'But he's not very clever and his penalties become riots. It's always him.' Robbie said: 'I've never dived in my career. I was blameless.'

5: Slaven Bilic
Croatia v France, World Cup semi-final, 8 July 1998

Feeling the hairs on the back of Laurent Blanc's hand brush his cheek, Bilic went down, his hands covering his face. He stayed down until Blanc had been dismissed, which meant he was suspended for the World Cup Final. 'He only had himself to blame,' said Bilic. 'I am not a cheat, I am honest. I am not to blame. After all, he hit me in my face.' Bilic was condemned by the PFA, colleagues and fans across Europe, including his own in Croatia.

6: El-Hadji Diouf
Senegal v Uruguay, World Cup, 11 June 2002

On his way round Uruguay keeper Fabian Carini, El-Hadji Diouf felt the keeper's breath on his shin. The gust blew him up, then down, then all over the penalty area. Replays confirmed no contact - as in, none at all - had been made. Later, Richard Morales did the same for Uruguay and the ref gave that, too. When he wasn't giving penalties, he was taking names: 12 players booked and Senegal through to the last 16. 'We'll keep playing to our strengths,' said Diouf. 'Above all, I feel proud.'

7: Francis Jeffers
Arsenal v Liverpool, December 2002

'He's the biggest cheat in football,' said Peter Osgood. 'I'd love to see him get really hurt.' Jeffers's greatest moment in an Arsenal shirt, a last-gasp trip over a space where John Arne Riise's leg might have been but wasn't, earned Arsenal a penalty and a point. 'The referee was conned,' said Gérard Houllier. 'I wouldn't be surprised if he practised diving in training,' said Ron 'Chopper' Harris. 'Since the foreigners came over here everyone's at it, even the English lads.'

'I'm not a conman or a diver,' said Franny, now back at Everton. 'I'm an honest player.'

8: Paul Alcock
Sheffield Wednesday v Arsenal, 26 September 1998

Just before half-time, Patrick Vieira and Petter Rudi drew handbags, Paolo Di Canio kicked Martin Keown's shin and Paul Alcock sent the latter pair off. Di Canio reacted by pushing the referee, who staggered backwards several paces before splaying like a new-born foal. 'I gave him a shove, but it was hardly done with force,' said Paolo. 'He took sideways steps then fell over in a rather strange way - like someone acting for a penalty.' Di Canio was banned for 11 games and Alcock threatened to retire. 'I did not expect to be branded a psycho,' said Paolo.

9: Rivaldo
Brazil v Turkey, World Cup, 3 June 2002

Hit in the leg by a football - always nasty - Rivaldo felt the pain searing in his face. Referee Yung Joo Kim, seeing him clutch his head, sent off the ball-kicker, Hakan Unsal. Fifa fined Rivaldo £5,180. 'I'm calm about the punishment, and I am not sorry about anything,' he told reporters. 'I was both the victim and the person who got fined. Obviously the ball didn't hit me in the face, but I was still the victim. I did not hit anyone in the face! Nobody remembers what that Turk did to me. I'm not a player who fakes fouls.'

10: Mark Hughes
Manchester United v Montpellier, Cup Winners' Cup quarter-final, 6 March 1991

Millions watched as Mark Hughes was thrown backwards by the weight of a Pascal Baills air-butt. Uefa wouldn't allow Baills to use TV evidence to prove he hadn't made contact. Hughes was warned not to travel for the second leg by Montpellier president, Louis Nicollin. 'What Nicollin said is intimidation,' said Alex Ferguson. 'This is 1991. They can't get away with these things.' In the event, Hughes travelled; Jean-Manuel Thetis was booked for fouling him and sent off for spitting at him. United won 2-0.

· Rationale

This month's 10 was selected by Observer football writer David Hills. Here he justifies his choice:

So where's Ruud? Like Franny Lee, the game's first great English diver, Van Nistelrooy's effective dive-for-penalty/score-from-penalty routine knocks him way down the list. This list is about showmanship, about falling with an eye on the cameras.

Among those to nearly make it were Italy's Alessandro Del Piero against England in 1997; Klinsmann for Monaco against Milan in the 1994 Champions League semi-final; Bernd Hölzenbein for Germany in the 1974 World Cup Final; Robert Pires for Arsenal against Portsmouth this season; and Peter Schmeichel, in 1993, knocked down by a Micky Quinn punch that missed. Quinn's red card was one of the first to be overturned on TV evidence.

Other contenders included David Speedie, Cristiano Ronaldo, Hristo Stoichkov, David Ginola, Anders Limpar, Sasa Curcic, Vitor Baia, Maradona, Christian Panucci and Hakan Sukur, whose air sprawl against England in Turkey last month was genre-defining. Michael Owen, against Argentina in 1998, was ruled out for patriotic reasons.

One other near miss: Ariel Ortega in the 1998 World Cup quarter-final. In the 88th minute, Ortega plunged over but missed Jaap Stam's leg; he was so incensed at being booked, instead of winning a penalty, that he head-butted keeper Edwin van der Sar, who, writhing in pain, threw himself to the ground. Ortega - out-dived and humiliated - was sent off.

Roberto Rojas was the clear winner, however, not least because he inspired a copycat self-slashing from Esperance keeper Chokri el Ouaer in the 2000 African Champions League final. Chokri's attempt at self-knifing, though, was seen by all, including the officials. He was substituted and banned for a year.

dejans

this thread is useless without videos

Lawman

Is Steven Gerrard not on this list as he has his own top 10?

GE

What about Gilardino's? surely the worst dive EVER.



"That was an outrageous dive" the commentator summed it up.

TheRedPirate

No. 1, fucking hell

duffer

Rivaldo



Drogba and Lehman

Doogie

Roberto Rojas

duffer

Loads in here. The last 2 are brilliant.

Redlambs

Love the music!

Skholesy

I find it disturbing that players are allowed to bring razorblades onto the pitch.

Whether they use it on themselves or others is irrelevant

Floyd

Ha ha, brilliant.

The last one in there is from Norway, cringe worthy stuff.

Here's a piss take of the very same situation during a goal celebration, the following week.

A MUST SEE! (BTW it's Carew from his Rosenborg days)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwST-t-YyCs

Sam#1

Giggsy PO

fuckin hell

olesmyhero

Drogba and Lehman, what a couple of spastics.

IBleedRed

with a little luck we wont have to suffer either of them next season in the PL

KingEric7

That's the first one that came into my head upon opening this thread,

KeyserSoze

What the fuck.

McGRATH LEGEND

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZviLX37sMY



I would be grateful if someone could tell me how to embed the video

Nick 0208 Ldn

What about Dida and that Celtic supporter from earlier this season? It was so bad that even UEFA got off their useless ass and did soemthing.

I can't remember anythign specific but that away leg agaisnt Porto [the year they won the CL], there must be an incident from that match.

Nick 0208 Ldn

Take the latters and numbers that come after the = in the URL, and put them between "". Without the quotation marks of course, that is jsut so it shows up in this post.

That shoul do the trick.

soulblight3r

Between "" actually

Smash-E

the obvious one that is missing is Dida.

Also Rooney against Arsenal

Alex

Dida's dive was pathetic

iPete

Lehmann trying to outdo the master of dives!

iPete

The part with the headbutting coach was hilarious.

-Bad acting skills by Nani!



edit...the first vid was of bad quality

Nick 0208 Ldn

Quite so, whoops, missed out a /



Let's try it like this instead.

McGRATH LEGEND, this is what you are aiming for, this is your vid. If you quote this post you should be able to see what i have done.In future simply replicate the process, only with the unique characters that follow the = in the URL from the new youtube video.

Smash-E

Steven Taylor's was much worse.

Robbo

Celtic vs United...The jarosik dive before Nakamuras free kick against us was appalling..

brad-dyrak

That one slays me.

McGRATH LEGEND

Thanks for the advice on embedding the videos.

Name Changed

That was awful. He should have been sent off.

MrMarcello

The article was written in 2003 well before many of the dives you spastics are mentioning.