Goons' role of shame update

Discussion in 'Football Forum' started by Slabber, Jun 3, 2005.

  1. Jun 3, 2005
    #1

    Slabber Guest

    1886: Gooner Stench. Formed from leftovers and crap in South London Dial Square as they were originally known played their first match on a field with an open sewer running through the middle – the stench remains an integral part of them to this day
    1913: Gypsies: Henry Norris was a west London estate agent who dreamed of challenging the dominance of Northern and midlands clubs in the English League early in the last century. Norris, who later became mayor of Fulham, a Conservative member of parliament and earned a knighthood as well as a lifetime ban from soccer, believed that if he merged ailing Woolwich Arsenal of south London with Fulham in west London his dream of a London super-club could take shape. But the League blocked his proposals, so he cut his ties with Fulham, gambled all on Arsenal and moved them across the River Thames and north to the wide-open spaces of Highbury. The only trouble with this plan was that the new stadium was close to the established homes of Tottenham three miles north and Clapton Orient, two miles east. Despite Spurs and Orient's protests, the League was powerless to prevent the move and in 1913 the North London rivalry between Arsenal-Spurs began.
    1919: Get Spurs relegated and Arsenal promoted from 6th position - In 1915, when Football ended because of World War One, Chelsea and Spurs had finished bottom of the first division and Arsenal were sixth in Division two. The League planned to expand the first division by two clubs and precedent dictated that the two bottom clubs would stay up and the top two in the second division would join them. Sir Henry had other ideas. To this day the details of exactly what occurred at the league's meeting in March 1919 remains a mystery, but by the end of the day, Arsenal had been voted into the first division and Spurs voted out. Arsenal have never been out of the top flight since.
    1924: Druggie cheats – More tales of Gooners up to no good with manager Leslie Knighton admitting giving performance enhancing drugs to his shit players during their unsuccessful 1924 FA Cup run.
    1929: Justice for the First of the Gooners - Henry Norris – a lifetime ban from Football. In 1929 the FA banned him from soccer because he constantly flouted their rules and was also suspected of making illegal payments to players.
    1974: Don Howe – Criminally Insane individual
    1979: Alan Sunderland - "and you're just a murderer, Sunderland"
    1979: Peter Story - jail for running a brothel
    1980: Peter Story - jail again, this time for counterfeit gold coins
    1987: Paul Vassen - Drug stuff
    1988: Paul Davis - breaking Glenn Cockerill's jaw during a first division game
    1989: Paul Merson and Steve Bould are "disciplined by Arsenal" after late night incident at sponsor's function.
    1989: Arsenal are fined £20,000 by FA for part in brawl during game against Norwich
    1989: Andy Cole - Lightfingers with wallets and stuff in the dressing room apparently
    1990: Peter Story - jail again - this time for porn smuggling conviction
    1990: Merson, Groves, Winterburn & Richardson sent home from club tour of Singapore following another alleged "late night incident".
    1990: Arsenal fined £50,000 by FA and docked two points after Old Trafford brawl. The Club in turn fined manager George Graham two weeks wages after holding him responsible for lack of discipline on the field.
    1990: Tony Adams - Jailed on drunk-driving charges.
    1991: Paul Merson, Ian Wright and David Seaman charged by FA with misconduct after incidents at end of first division match at Oldham.
    1982: Lee Dixon – played for England, and even Adams used to sing “if Dixon plays for England so could I” to him in training
    1993: Andy Linaghan makes anti Semitic remarks to Jewish Taxi driver
    1993: Ian Wright banned for punching David Howells
    1994: Paul Merson , probably for a bet or when he was pissed, was sent to drug addiction clinic
    1994: David Seamen dumped his Mrs and Kids for some floozy
    1994: George Graham's £430,000 bungs first reported
    1995: Ray Parlour arrested after punch-up with Hong Kong taxi-driver on a club tour
    1995: Graham found guilty by FA inquiry and banned from football for 12 months.
    1995: David Hillier charged by police for credit card and luggage theft at airport.
    1996: Donkey Adams confesses to his teammates that he is an alcoholic (and then puts his arm round them telling them they are his best mate).
    1996:Nigel Winterburn under investigation by the FA after the police reported him to match officials for making inflammatory gestures towards rival supporters in the wheelchair section
    1996: Ian Wright smashes and badly breaks Coventry goalkeeper Steve Ogrizivic's nose
    1996. Unfounded & completely untrue rumours circulated about Arsene Wenger being a paedophile! which he most certainly is not.
    1998: From the repulsive JVC, they are now sponsored by the Spanish word for Wank, Sega. Apparently “Arsenal” means something disgusting in most languages
    1998: Dutch winger Glenn Helder attempted suicide after becoming a compulsive gambler whilst at Scumbury
    1999: Despite "New" Arsenal, they still have the worst disciplinary record in the league
    1999: Ian Wright Chicken tonight advert
    1999: Graham Rix - Old Gooner instincts die hard, as he joins the rest of his former team mates inside for a spot of under age sex
    1999: Sheffield United in the Cup scandal - Typical example of their cheating ethos. It was the 5th round, it was 1-1. A Sheff United striker had gone down after a Grimandi challenge and the ball was cleared, eventually coming through to the United keeper and, as Bergkamp closed in, the keeper cleared into touch so his teammate could receive treatment. There followed a break while the United man got treatment, and was substituted. Parlour then took the throw, but rather than give it back to United, as almost all honourable sportsmen will do, he threw it to Kanu who passed it to Overmars who scored the winner. Evil and wicked
    2000: Patrick Viera sent off twice in the space of 2 games for violent conduct.
    2000: Arsene Wenger charged with charged with threatening behaviour and physical intimidation of fourth official Paul Taylor
    2001: Ray Parlour illegal parking of a caravan
    2001: Sol Campbell using a public toilet
    2001: Monkey Keown assault charge during a game with Leeds
    2001: Viera sent off to 8th time – although to be fair he was having a go at Dennis Wise
    2001: Silvinho sold for possessing too much flair, Stepanovs, Grimandi, Luzhny breathe a sigh of relief
    2001: Monkey Keown pretends to be elbowed to get Hasselbaink sent off
    2001: Viera - cheats to win a penalty against Shalke
    2001: Gooner Bin Laden – The world most wanted man is revealed as a Gooner
    2001: Pires – caught spitting at Kevin Muscat during a France match
    2001: Planning permission for New Scumbury – Years after the Gillespie Road station naming fiasco, the Goons are in league with Islington Council to get planning permission to move to the council rubbish dump. No hint of wrong doing at all as the stadium gets the go-ahead despite:
    - Safety concerns at the North end of the complex,
    - Real jobs replaced by McJobs as 1,000’s of jobs at risk as the incumbent business have to move
    - Transportation problems already present on matchdays to double with the increased capacity (assuming they can fill it)
    - SSSI Gillespie Park to be ruined by Bovine Goons going too and from the match.
    2002: Goon Prince – Well known Goon Prince Harold has done his level best to make the rest of the goons proud of him by having an underage drink & drugs problem. All he needs now is to develop a gambling problem (which should not be too difficult considering him relatives) and he’ll be a ringer for a young Merson.
    2002: Ticket investigation – Parlour was at the centre of an investigation as to how his complimentary tickets ended up in the hands of touts. Police were alerted by the increased number of caravans within the vicinity of the stadium.
    2002: Mockney Twat – Jamie Oliver confirmed as a gooner – all those people you really hated – all goons!
    2002: Puddin Alert – Semen lets England down against Brazil in the World Cup
    2002: Start as you mean to go on – Diving Ashley Cole gets a Birmingham player sent off. Goons win against 10 men
    2002: Puddin Alert (2) – Semen & Rsol lets England down against Macedonia in the European Championships
    2003: Reg Hollis – Serially Dull TV copper admits he is a goon to no-one’s surprise
    2003: Prostitute Pennant – Step mum of young goon is a £60 hooker according to the People newspaper
    2003: Beast is a Gooner – One of the ugliest women ever to lumber around the planet, Eastenders Sonia Jackson has admitted she is goon which is hardly surprising.
    2003: Sex offender Goon – Goon youth team player Marcus Artry jailed for 9 years for sex attacks, inc on minors
    2004: Sad Man – Record new signing Reyes declares “I am the saddest man” on hearing he is going to be a Goon and tries to fit in by scoring a spectacular own goal Dixon would be proud of to knock the Goons out of the League Cup in his first game
    2004: Cheating Goons and the non penalty – For the first time in history a referee changes a decision because of player protests and it comes as no surprise to see that the goons are the beneficiaries against Fulham
    2004: Graham Stack on Rape charge – Another Goon in trouble with the old bill
    2005: Reyes and the bad men – Less than a year after joining, Reyes is duped into revealing his desperation to leave Arsenal cos of all the “bad men” in a radio wind up.
    2005: Pennant banged up – More goons in trouble, this time Jermaine Pennant is locked up for three months for the age old Scumbury tradition of drink driving & crashing motors
    2005: Sol Campell's brother convicted of GBH on a man who questioned the former England international's sexuality. He was beaten and punched unconscious in a frenzied attack.
  2. Jun 3, 2005
    #2

    Number7 Ret's Slave

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    :lol:
  3. Jun 3, 2005
    #3

    Donaldo Caf Vigilante

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    :rolleyes:

    'Scumbury'?The site where you whisked it off from had no imagination.

    Everyone knows you're scum, Slobber, live with it.
  4. Jun 3, 2005
    #4

    Looking Busy Full Member

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    Only one mistake 1998 Sega is slag for wank in Spanish not Italian
  5. Jun 3, 2005
    #5

    Slabber Guest

    Thanks. I've amended it accordingly.
  6. Jun 3, 2005
    #6

    Slabber Guest

    :tard:
  7. Jun 3, 2005
    #7

    Looking Busy Full Member

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    Always glad to be of assistance
  8. Jun 3, 2005
    #8

    Slabber Guest

    Former England defender Sol Campbell's brother has been jailed for 12 months for attacking a student who allegedly suggested the player "might be gay".
    John Campbell, 34, of Manor Park, in east London, was found guilty at Snaresbrook Crown Court in April of grievous bodily harm.

    The court heard Campbell punched and kicked Mark Golstein unconscious, shattering his jaw, last February.

    Mr Golstein has always denied making the remark about the Arsenal player.

    'Loss of control'

    Campbell was cleared of an alternative charge of GBH with intent.

    Sentencing him on Friday, Judge David Richardson said: "I am told you are frustrated when people taunt you about your brother... but it does not justify an attack with kicks.

    "Mr Golstein's behaviour could have been dealt with by words."

    Mr Golstein, 26, a student at the University of East London, spent three days in hospital after the attack and could initially only take food through a straw.

    Campbell, older brother of the Arsenal and England defender, had denied the charges, insisting he only defended himself after Mr Golstein struck the first blow.

    'Self-defence'

    The court heard Campbell punched and kicked his victim during a training session at Clapton Football Club in February 2004.

    Campbell told the court he acted in self defence after Mr Golstein told him, "Your brother's gay", and threw the first punch.

    Mark Golstein, who was on a four-year sport and exercise course with Campbell, denied he had made comments regarding Sol Campbell's sexuality.

    Campbell's barrister said his client had endured years of "turning the other cheek" and now he had "brought shame on his family and most ironically to his younger brother, whose reputation he had fought to protect".

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/4606713.stm
  9. Jun 3, 2005
    #9

    Donaldo Caf Vigilante

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    :lol: You are just laughable..the way you pronounce yourslf as a great club.You're nothing as a club and never will be..stay in the shadows of the Gunners, you 'kin tit.
  10. Jun 3, 2005
    #10

    Slabber Guest

    :tard:
  11. Jun 3, 2005
    #11

    Donaldo Caf Vigilante

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    Martin Jol is queuing in his local building society, when a gunman bursts in through the door demanding money. Jol attempts to tackle the raider, but gets knocked over...as he falls, his head smashes the counter and Jol is out cold. The robber escapes and the cashier tries to revive Jol. After a few minutes he comes round and looks bewildered. His first words are "Where the hell am I?". The Cashier replies: "don't worry, its ok, you're in the Nationwide." …Jol replies, "F**k me, is it May already?"


    Martin Jol is out shopping in town when he sees an old lady struggling with her shopping…
    MJ "Can you manage, love?"
    Old Lady: "Up yours Fat Boy, you took the job, you're stuck with it…"



    How many Tottenham fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
    None, they're all happy living in the shadows…
  12. Jun 3, 2005
    #12

    Spoony Guest


    Arsenal will never be as big as Spurs.
  13. Jun 3, 2005
    #13

    Donaldo Caf Vigilante

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    :)
  14. Jun 3, 2005
    #14

    Los Rojos Gobbledygook from the plastic spastic

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    Think they care? They win trophies - Spurs don't.
  15. Jun 3, 2005
    #15

    Slabber Guest

    Would a big club complain to the Premier League about having one of its players tapped-up? Middlesbrough complained about Liverpool and Ziege (to be fair to Boro, they had a confidential minimum fee release clause they were seeking to protect). Southampton complained about Aston Villa and James Beattie. Man Utd didn't complain about Chelsea and Rio Ferdinand. What did Arsenal do?
  16. Jun 3, 2005
    #16

    Slabber Guest

    Never have been, never will be...
  17. Jun 3, 2005
    #17

    Keane16 Redcafe Minister for Guinness Therapy

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    Eugene, are you even listening to me?
    Are you the bloke who keeps changing clubs or is that someone else?
  18. Jun 3, 2005
    #18

    VanNistelrater Poncey film buff

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    Well said.
  19. Jun 3, 2005
    #19

    Spoony Guest



    They'll never have their glamour.

    Small time. . . always have been.

    Spurs, Greater London's biggest club.
  20. Jun 3, 2005
    #20

    Donaldo Caf Vigilante

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    Nice to see you're as clueless as ever.

    So thats the basis for a big club now?

    And Arsenal stopped something which could soon become a reality in football globally.

    Don't worry Slabber, we're not interested in your present captain.... :smirk:
  21. Jun 3, 2005
    #21

    Donaldo Caf Vigilante

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    Never changed clubs never will.:)

    Thta was a major misunderstanding.
  22. Jun 3, 2005
    #22

    Slabber Guest

    It is already a global reality and they haven't stopped it. You can't stop agents calling agents.

    Arsenal have made themselves look like the whiney, small-club tits that they are.
  23. Jun 3, 2005
    #23

    Los Rojos Gobbledygook from the plastic spastic

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    They have some of the best players in the world at Arsenal and play the best brand of football seen for sometime. They entertain and are successful. You're telling me that's not glamorous?

    As for the rest, it doesn't matter. Arsenal, Greater London's most successful club.
  24. Jun 3, 2005
    #24

    Slabber Guest

    Let me guess, you've supported them since 1998 and haven't changed since, except for a brief spell supporting United in 1999?
  25. Jun 3, 2005
    #25

    Slabber Guest

    More successful but smaller...
  26. Jun 3, 2005
    #26

    Spoony Guest

    Sunderland's got more titles than Newcastle. North East's most successful club. So what.

    We're talking about glamour, prestige and class. Arsenal have never had it.
  27. Jun 3, 2005
    #27

    VanNistelrater Poncey film buff

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    :lol:

    The dirty, sordid, unspoken Footballing affair between the Scousers and Gooners rears its collectively ugly face again...

    ;)
  28. Jun 3, 2005
    #28

    Spoony Guest


    Arsenal fan since 2004, the 'unbeaten' season. Stuck with them through thick and thin this year though. . .
  29. Jun 3, 2005
    #29

    Keane16 Redcafe Minister for Guinness Therapy

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    Eugene, are you even listening to me?
    Spurs remind me of Offaly.

    That's hardly going to make sense to anyone.

    Except maybe DONADO who supported Offaly in the early eighties.
  30. Jun 3, 2005
    #30

    Slabber Guest

    mainly thin
  31. Jun 3, 2005
    #31

    Los Rojos Gobbledygook from the plastic spastic

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    Glamour. Thierry Henry, Robert Pires, Dennis Bergkamp, Freddy "pin up" Ljungberg, Jose Reyes. Stylish footballers and people, that's glamorous.

    Prestige. If prestige comes by winning trophies and being successful, then there isn't any argument to be had here.

    Class. What exactly have Spurs had that's more 'classy' than Arsenal?

    As for the Sunderland/Newcastle example, that's silly considering one of them is yo-yo club and their success in no way matches that of the club's we are talking about.
  32. Jun 3, 2005
    #32

    Slabber Guest

    Name some all-time great players to have played for Arsenal. I'm talking about players who might get into a top 50: maybe Henry and Bergkamp?

    At Spurs: Lineker, Gascoigne, Hoddle, Klinsmann, Greaves, Ginola etc. Teddy Sheringham would get my vote too.
  33. Jun 3, 2005
    #33

    Los Rojos Gobbledygook from the plastic spastic

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    No affair, I just thought a sense of realism and honesty wouldn't go amiss here ;)
  34. Jun 3, 2005
    #34

    Red Dreams Full Member

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    :lol:

    Arsenal and Liverpool supporters have the insurance of having a second team to support...probably will add Chelsea to that insurance scheme next season :)
  35. Jun 3, 2005
    #35

    Red Dreams Full Member

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    imo Greaves stands heads and shoulders above anyone who ever played for Arsenal past or present.
  36. Jun 3, 2005
    #36

    Donaldo Caf Vigilante

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    Tottenham since their inception have their Football league record as follows.

    Elected to Division Two 1908
    Division Two 1908-1909
    Division One 1909-1915
    Division Two 1919-1920
    Division One 1920-1928
    Division Two 1928-1933
    Division One 1933-1935
    Division Two 1935-1950
    Division One 1950-1977
    Division Two 1977-1978
    Division One 1978-1992
    Premier League 1992-


    They've finished first in the league 4 times, the last time recently in the 1960-61 season..:lol:
    They've also finshed at 10th or below a measly 31 times.(8 times in the Premiership)

    Their best showing in the Premiership is a 7th place finish in the 94-95 season.

    In Europe, their last win over a 'big' club would be a 2-0 win over Bayern Munich on 7th Dec 83.

    Big club.:lol:
  37. Jun 3, 2005
    #37

    Spoony Guest


    Sunderland 7 league titles. Have had crowds touching 80,000. More than Arsenal could dream of, but lets no go into that.

    Spurs historically have had the biggest support in London. And have always been seen as the biggest club in the South. History of quality football from Blanchflower to Greaves to Hoddle to Gazza, bigger crowds and more class. There's no way a good 2000 + is enough to even mention both clubs in the same breath.

    City were more successful than United in early to mid seventies. Some say for a short period they were the more glamorous club, but we still had the biggest crowds in England despite being in the second division. No matter how good they were with Marsh, Lee and Bell they STILL weren't as big as United. Same goes for Arsenal and their 'good' recent run. No matter what they do, Spurs will always be seen as the bigger club. . .

    Just the way it is. . . don't cry your eyes out.
  38. Jun 3, 2005
    #38

    Spoony Guest


    Bigger club. Not more successful but bigger. Notts Forest would be classed as bigger than Barcelona if it were up to you. And Sunderland would be in the top 5 in the UK.

    Spurs are bigger. Arsenal more successful.

    capiche?
  39. Jun 3, 2005
    #39

    Slabber Guest

    Europe? Arsenal won the Fairs Cup in 1970 and the Cup Winners Cup in 1994. That's it. Spurs have won more in Europe than Arsenal.

    Why were Arsenal elected to Division One in 1919 after finishing 5th in Division Two? Answer at the beginning of the thread.
  40. Jun 3, 2005
    #40

    VanNistelrater Poncey film buff

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    Its there, I tell you. The Scousers and Gooners really fancy each other, havent you seen them flirt?

    'Ah guv, you're de most succesful team in England, so much clarhs, pwestige - gweat admiration for ya'
    'Well youse play de best Footbahll ive ever ever seen la, even since King Kenny, the Invincibles youse are, nevermind dem dirty Mancs, dey doh dont dey do' etc.

    Alaister McGowern is shitting his kegs.