Shreeves Crushing Dreams

Discussion in 'Football Forum' started by Hectic, Apr 24, 2012.

  1. Apr 25, 2012

    Hectic Moderator

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    I was about a second away from falling into a deep sleep when Shreeves text me saying "You know you can't fall asleep if you're reading a text message." I switched my phone off by the third text asking me if I definitely knew that.
  2. Apr 25, 2012

    Carl has permanently erect nipples

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    :houllier:
  3. Apr 25, 2012

    Bread Full Member

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    He tried it on with Terry too, reminding him about Moscow and saying with tonight as well, surprised he didn't say "and obviously you've already fecked your International career by boning your friends mrs and hating black people, what is there left to fight for John?"
  4. Apr 25, 2012

    Viper KGB Full Member

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    I haven't laughed this much in ages, bravo Hectic
  5. Apr 25, 2012

    Pscholes18 Full Member

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    hahahahahahahahaha
  6. Apr 25, 2012

    Bread Full Member

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    They should get him to do comic relief style appeals from famine ridden countries. "Just to Clarify please send your money in, it's to be a frank a drop in the ocean and very unlikely to solve anything but please do it"
  7. Apr 25, 2012

    NoLogo Full Member

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    Hahaha. Awesome.
  8. Apr 25, 2012

    Judge Red Don't Call Me Douglas

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    They should have got him to give the Ched Evans verdict.
  9. Apr 25, 2012

    Bread Full Member

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    "Ched, You've had a good season scoring in more than one sense. Have you seen The Shawshank Redemption?"
  10. Apr 25, 2012

    redevil2 Full Member

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    I just wonder if Shreeves tells Roy Keane "you're not playing in the final!" what will happen! I think Keane will go mental, "@&$@&/@*+£¥\{you x&@-/ f*cker!" lol
  11. Apr 25, 2012

    rcoobc Not as crap as eferyone thinks

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    To the original post, :lol:

    Really shocked me
  12. Apr 25, 2012

    kf Full Member

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    I may be a heartless bastard but I thought it was hilarious... as Fergie might say "Well done, Geoff!"
  13. Apr 25, 2012

    Lynk Obsessed with discrediting Danny Welbeck

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    Geoff Shreeves would be the perfect candidate to interview the McCanns.
  14. Apr 25, 2012

    Judge Red Don't Call Me Douglas

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    I would like a genius to Shreevesmeme something like this.

  15. Apr 25, 2012

    vuc First Team Serb

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    :lol:
  16. Apr 25, 2012

    stubie Full Member

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    Geoff Shreeves "You've beaten cancer today! you die tomorrow!"
  17. Apr 25, 2012

    amolbhatia100 Barbiturates ain't got nothin' on me

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    Fantastic thread, Hectic.
  18. Apr 25, 2012

    Solius Has a massive ginger bush

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    :lol:
  19. Apr 25, 2012

    Hectic Moderator

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    I genuinely woke up very ill today and have stayed at home sick. I've been casting nervous glances at my windows expecting Shreeves to swing through one of them at any moment on a bungee cord to tell me the extent of my illness, which no doubt will lead to imminent death.
  20. Apr 25, 2012

    Name Changed weso26

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    How would Ivanovic not of known he would have been out of the final with a booking?
  21. Apr 25, 2012

    Hectic Moderator

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    Shreeves probably told him before the game his slate was clean and he could play like a free man. He's a bit of a sicko.
  22. Apr 25, 2012

    Bread Full Member

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    Im sure he also pointed out what a warn torn political country serbia used to be and the chances of that happening again.
  23. Apr 25, 2012

    kps88 Full Member

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    [​IMG]
  24. Apr 25, 2012

    Hectic Moderator

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    Fair play to Shreeves though, not many people would take it on themselves to travel around a city like Barcelona throughout the night, with just one translator for company, going door to door and telling people in no uncertain terms they have been knocked out, with a smile on his face.
  25. Apr 25, 2012

    Bread Full Member

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    Dressing up as General Franco to do it was probably a bit much though
  26. Apr 25, 2012

    Hectic Moderator

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    Just watching that clip again, you can see Shreeves starts off his assault by asking Ivanovic if he was booked after the penalty. Now, Shreeves obviously knows he was, he has text messages saved under 'drafts' that he will send on the day to those Chelsea players who are ineligible to play, saying 'Today is final day!! You aren't playing though'. So we know Shreeves already knows this, but what he is doing is trying to make Ivanovic forget the momentary delight he is experiencing, take him out of that comfort zone which allows him to ignore reality, even ignore the adrenaline pumping through him, he is trying to bring him down to ground level. Of course, Ivanovic has no idea what is coming so he says yes, almost enthusiastically as if being booked was some kind of priviledge. This is all achieved in just 4 seconds, which sets him up wonderfully to deliver the haymaker upside Ivanovic's already internally bleeding head.
  27. Apr 25, 2012

    I'm always right Banned

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    :lol::lol::lol: feck me!
  28. Apr 25, 2012

    Ruud_boy_10 Full Member

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    :lol::lol::lol:
  29. Apr 25, 2012

    Hectic Moderator

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    "Well she's in a better place now, for that we can all be thankful"
    "You mean the ground? She's in the ground you know. Under that spot right there."
    "Her body may be there, but her spirit is elsewhere"
    "It's definitely there. Do you believe in heaven?"
    "Yes we do."
    "Then there's every chance she is in Hell."
    "Wh...Who are you and why are you here?"
    "I'm Geoff Shreeves and I'm alive, goodbye."
  30. Apr 25, 2012

    kf Full Member

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  31. Apr 25, 2012

    Adam-Utd Part of first caf team to complete Destiny raid

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    i find these stories work best when amagining him talking like Gob from arrested development, in his "hello micheal" sort of voice.

    Excellent.
  32. Apr 25, 2012

    Ruud_boy_10 Full Member

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    :lol::lol::lol:

    This is turning into a classic thread.
  33. Apr 25, 2012

    Ramshock Full Member

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    what a miserable fecking wanker...actually made me feel sorry for a chav player

    thought this was funny

    [​IMG]
  34. Apr 25, 2012

    dumbo Full Member

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    He has always been a vile weasel of a man. He grassed up Meireles for an apparant "gesture" he made to the Benfica fans, he snitched on wenger for apparantly contacting the bench when he was banned in the stands. And he is always looking to patronise or provoke in his interviews.

    He is a fat, greasy, sniveling, grass cnut.
  35. Apr 25, 2012

    Smith's Cove Full Member

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    This ^

    Ivanovic is a cnut.
  36. Apr 25, 2012

    Nani Nana Full Member

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    He ain't a cnut but a great, humble person.

    You're a cnut. Actually scratch that you're a shitc*nt. BOO
  37. Apr 25, 2012

    lysglimt Full Member

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    Have to tell a hilarious story from Norway from 20 years ago. Some of you might remember Lars Bohinen from Nottingham and Blackburn. Back when he was playing in Norway for Lillestrom there were a lot of rumours about Frank Clark of Forest wanting to sign him - and Lillestrom's coach Ivar Hoff dropped him from the next match which was televised.

    There was a female tv-reporter (quite young and inexperienced - but very .. shall we say determined) who was interviewing Hoff before the game. And her first question was "why have you dropped Bohinen" - and he went ballistic screaming "We agreed before this interview that Bohinen wouldn't be mentioned and the first thing you do is ask about him" and he really yelled at her lacking professionalism and God knows what. It was hilarious! I even think he had to resign from the club mainly because of that interview! :)
  38. Apr 25, 2012

    RDCR07 Not a bad guy (Whale Killer)

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    How exactly is he a cnut?
  39. Apr 25, 2012

    vuc First Team Serb

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    :lol:

    Nani's right (I keep saying this, it's irking me), Ivanovic is a great guy.

    You must be calling him a cnut because of his performances against United - done no worse than Vidic has vs Chelsea.
  40. Apr 25, 2012

    FreakyJim Full Member

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    Didn't Ivanovic punch someone in the back recently?

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