The solution is simple. Have 20 members of the caf film themselves in kit (ideally 10 in one colour and 10 in another):
- receiving a ball
- passing a ball
- shooting a ball
- running with ball
- running off the ball
- going in for a slide tackle
- doing a kick-off
- running towards a ball and falling down
- diving (show everything including feet)
- pretending you've been tackled by a player (don't show feet)
- losing the ball
- seeing a loose ball and running towards it
- taking a throw-in
- receiving a ball from a throw-in
- taking a penalty
- taking a corner
- taking a freekick
- standing in a wall
- receiving a ball from a corner and heading it
- receiving a ball from a corner and shooting
- doing a 'hand of god'
- headbutting camera
- act as if you've been headbutted and go down
- same as above but roll on floor a few times with hands over face, but looking through fingers smiling
- celebrating a goal
- doing VAR signal
- shouting at the camera (ref)
- putting two fingers up at the camera (ref)
- shake head from opponent scoring a goal
- letting ball hit your hand and look sad as ref has given freekick/penalty
- walk off camera as if you've been sent off
Then have 2 members of the caf film themselves in front of goalposts (both in different coloured kit):
- catching a ball
- punching a ball away
- conceding a goal
- diving to save
- goalkick
- passing ball
- catching ball but slips out of your fingers
- ball hitting post and going back out
- ball hitting post and going in goal
- ball hitting post, bounce off, hit goalkeeper in face and go in net
- basically, just watch this
Then have one person in black kit film themselves:
- holding up yellow card
- holding up red card and pointing off camera
- running
- wheezing with hands on knees trying to get breath back
- blowing whistle for foul
- pointing to penalty spot
- using some sort of aerosol to set up freekick
- doing VAR signal
- blowing whistle for kick-off, half-time and full-time
Then have another person in black kit with a flag film themselves:
- running across a straight line looking at the pitch
- holding up the flag
- back view of both
Then have two people film themselves (one wearing suit, one trackies):
- sitting down
- sitting down shouting
- sitting down talking to someone
- barking instructions standing up
- arguing with someone (fourth official)
- celebrating a goal
- act pissed off at a decision
- act as if your player has been hurt/want opposition player to be punished
- shaking someone's hand off camera (opposition manager)
- go to shake someone's hand but they blank you (react disappointed)
- see someone shake your hand but walk away blanking them (smirk)
Then have one more person in black kit film themselves:
- doing fourth official things
Then have a kid film themselves:
Then have someone record themselves (audio only):
- doing various chants including "the referee's a wanker" and "feck VAR"
- booing
- cheering
- whistling
Then have
@Rolandofgilead commentate a number of catchphrases, someone can splice everything together with the audio overlayed to make a match and you're looking at the next Cannes Film Festival winner.
I spent way too much time on something unlikely to get one green smiley.