Bold Predictions/Steamin' hot takes for the 22/23 Season.

Revaulx

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well part of my "bold" prediction is shaw will not even make a bench spot
Which is why I don’t think it’s remotely likely, unlike your other predictions, all of which I thought had a reasonable probability of being fulfilled.

As far as I’m aware Shaw is genuinely injured (again :boring:) and isn’t out of contention for any other reason (health problems, off-field issues etc). EtH seems to be the type of harsh but fair manager that can cope with a high maintenance player like him. So I doubt that he won’t get a chance at the very least.

If I had to back one of our sorry crop of full backs to prosper next season it would be Dalot. He’s a hard worker, isn’t injury-prone and has a reasonable level of basic skill. Something for the manager and coaches to work with.
 

Eyepopper

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Joel Glazer will be announced as Cavanis replacement, on £350k a week, and never see a minute of playing time.

Much fanfare will be made when the Glazers announce they will no longer be taking dividends from the club.
 

mctrials23

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ETH will get United playing erratically form wise but our fans will actually get to see what a well coached and drilled side looks like for the first time in god knows how long.

People will realise that we didn't need to sack every player in the squad and that plenty of them are just weak willed and go with the flow of the leaders in the dressing room.

Ronaldo won't play more than half the games this season.

We will finish in the top 4.

Sancho will look something like the player we thought we signed now that he has a framework to play in rather than abject chaos around him.

With a better midfield who work harder we won't have so many defensive issues.

Right back will still be a massive issue for us until the summer.

We will outplay more than 60-70% of the teams we face and actually come away from games having enjoyed the football and won't have to listen to bollocks like "if you can't enjoy United winning then you shouldn't be a fan" after Norwich have outplayed us for 90 minutes and we scrape past them.
 

Hughes35

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1. We will finish outside the top 4
2. Some fans will say we are making progress, some will say ETH is to blame and we should of hired Poch
3. Fred will be a mainstay in the team...... Like point 2, he will split opinion all season
4. Ronaldo will have a similar season to last year. Keep getting goals but the media talk will weirdly be about how he's the problem
 

Lynty

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Poch fanbase will be back in force come November, calling for Ten Hag to get the sack.

Rashford will hit his best form this season.

The club will attempt to bring Greenwood back into the squad and cause a media shitstorm before changing stance and selling him.
 

Revaulx

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Our adult babies complained about double training session and have to leave training in the dark
This is a big worry for me.

Many players have been so deeply immersed in the lazy ways that have characterised United in recent years that I can see them struggling to cope. They couldn’t do it under Ralf and kicked off about it; why do people assume things will be any different under EtH? Because he’s a nice cuddly guy in comparison to Evil Ralf? Because the coaches won’t be from the MLS? Really?

The only silver lining is that I have more confidence in the new hierarchy backing the manager over the players than was likely in the Ed era.
 

Stobzilla

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The club will attempt to bring Greenwood back into the squad and cause a media shitstorm before changing stance and selling him.
I absolutely believe this one will happen but I don't think they will sell him. My guess is they integrate him while they are abroad in either Australia or Bangkok.
 

youmeletsfly

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I have a few:
- the pattern of play will be visible
- dogshit players like Rashford and Shaw will rot on the bench if they don't perform and then leave next summer
- Bruno & Maguire will be slowly fazed out
- we won't make top5
- we'll win the FA Cup
- Europa League semis
 

The Corinthian

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Martial will finish the season as our top scorer.
with 8 goals in all comps to his name.
 

Big Andy

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No matter who we sign, they'll inevitably turn to shit, and we'll end up back where we started at the end of the season.
 

DOTA

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Brighton will make it into Europe
Think you'll go down.

Hope you're having a nice day.
 

pawanraj

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In ManUtd's version of the Groundhog day, we will finish 6th again, and Eric Ten Hag will be sacked.


I hope to God I am wrong.
 

DOTA

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West Ham will be in a relegation scrap.
 

Lynty

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I absolutely believe this one will happen but I don't think they will sell him. My guess is they integrate him while they are abroad in either Australia or Bangkok.
Ye, I think as soon as any pending case is dropped, we'll try to integrate him back into the squad - claiming that Police have concluded their investigations etc. Our PR team have already demonstrated how tone deaf they are on many occasions, so I can't imagine they'll run a successful enough PR campaign to combat the general cry of outrage.

At which point it's a very easy win for Ten Hag to just keep him in reserves to earn popular opinion - and declare him uneeded at the end of the season. You'll also have PR vultures like Rashford, circling to see whether showing support or distancing themselves from Greenwood will be better for thier image.

I lean towards his eventual sale. But the clubs got to try I suppose, after investing so much resources into a valued asset it would make sense test the fans pushback.
 

Yakuza_devils

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1. City will have injury crisis
2. Liverpool will be a different team without Mane and outgoing Salah
3. Chelsea owners refused to spend like Abramovich and the team form nosedived
4. Conte resigned as Spurs manager in Dec
5. Arsenal will be Arsenal
6. Man Utd with new manager and high intensity football fluke to EPL title
 

STYLOISRED

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Scott Mctominay will be a mainstay in ETHs starting 11.
Telles will leave in January as Alvaro Fernandes takes his spot on the bench and eventually makes the first 11 when Shaw goes on his usual 3/4 weeks seasonal injury.
Martial will have more goal contributions than Rashford.
 

DWelbz19

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Fernandes will struggle to hold down a position in the team.
 

Carl

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Fred will be our PotY.

Bruno will be moved around in multiple positions, before eventually settling up front.

Rashford will outscore Ronaldo across all comps.
 

tomaldinho1

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Ronaldo will get injured pre season meaning Martial comes in as No9. Expectations are low but under a bauld fraud, bald Martial rises like a Phoenix from the ashes of his dying career. 20 league goals.

We’ll also sign Antony meaning every assist he gives to Martial the commentator will refer to it as the Antony Martial connection.
 

No Idea For Nickname

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City will finish fifth.
Liverpool will finish seventh.
WHU will finish in top 4.
Gerard will be sacked.
We will score most goals.
We will conceide least goals.
Bruno will not bitch and moan.
Our full back will have most assists.
Ronaldo will win golden boot.
Lampard will be fired.
Jones will be best defender in the league.
Rashford will run whole game, every game.
Nunez will be flop.
Klopp will leave Liverpool.
Arsenal will finish 8th.
Pep will take vacation at the end of the season.
Halland will talk about his love for BVB in December.
Leeds will be relegated.
Conte will lose his...marbles.
We will win quadruple.
Eric's hair will grow back.
 

Yakuza_devils

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Phil Jones manage to stay fit the entire season playing like Duncan Edwards. Win Premier League POTY and Ballon d'Or award.
 

Kramer

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Tottenham will finish in the top 2 under Conte.

Darwin Nunez will turn out to be a complete fraud. Liverpool’s Nicolas Pepe.

Both Chelsea and Arsenal will finish outside the top 4.

United will finish third and above Liverpool in the league table.
 

Red Devil 26

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Bruno will eventually be benched mid way through the season when it becomes apparent he can't fit in to a more system oriented side.
 

grahamo

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Its a funny old game
United will be top of the league at the time of the world cup break as players play out of their skins to be included in world cup squads. After the world cup We will drop to 6th as the players will no longer give a sh*t!
 

Annihilate Now!

...or later, I'm not fussy
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At some point, we will be an actual competent football team.

and Marcus Rashford will be very good.
 

fps

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Martial will be given simple remits on the pitch and play rather well this season.

Rashford, Shaw and Fred will continue to play a good game every 3/4 to give a false impression of their quality.

The team will be involved in a lot of stale draws.

There will be at least one match where a newly promoted team looks like Real Madrid against us.
 

JinnerJamie

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City will saunter to the title and finally win the CL.
Liverpool will have average season finishing 2nd but being closer to 5th than the title.
United will just miss out on top 4 and will finish trophy less again but ETH will survive.
Spurs will have a good season beating Chelsea to 3rd and they will win a domestic cup.
Arsenal to finish 7th and Arteta will finally bite the bullet.

Rashford will start the season off with a bang and will claim a spot in the England Squad.
Ronaldo will finish the season with 20+ goals again.
Maguire will have a very good season but will still not have a definite partner as Varane will struggle again.
Dalot will be a contender for our player of season...
 

Yakuza_devils

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Man Utd's players finally able to grasp the concept that there are 90 mins in a football match. They are able to run and press for 90 mins and have better fitness than the asthma team.
 

OpenIntrovert

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I wont make a prediction, since we got no idea if injuries will happen and how lucky we will be in terms of decisions. But I know that the top six are going to be very close to each other in terms of points. I am also feeling optimistic that we will be one of the six going for the title.

We will be inconsistent at the start, since ETH is still trying his best to make the most out of the squad using different formations. But after about 4 to 5 games, we should be consistent and building up pace towards the top. The world cup is tricky as there will be injuries and players mentally off, so we will be inconsistent after the world cup and then we will pick up the pace again.
 

yamo123x

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The PR train

- no value in the market
- we are man utd and wont be held to ransom
- we came 2nd a few years ago, so we already have a good squad
- VDB like a new signing
- Time to work with promising youth players in the true utd way
-Rashford hungry and back to his best

Team
- hopefully an attacking style of play
- underperforming players benched / no favouritism
- top 4 finish and semis of Europa minimum
 

Varane around town

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City will walk the league as Liverpool will begin to struggle.

Eric will do a 'not great, not terrible' job in his first season.

Arsenal will struggle and Arteta will leave,

Fred will be our most improved player under Ten Hag

Rashford will be loaned out in January