Footballers who'd thrive in a prison environment

horsechoker

Sailor vee, this is a right off.
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Roy Keane
Eric Bailley
Gennaro Gattuso
Duncan Ferguson


Who else do you think would do well in prison?

(this isn't to say these men are criminals)
 

Cloud7

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Rojo seems like he would probably be able to hold his own.
 

Haddock

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Kevin Muscat and Ivan Zamorano would be leading rival scumbag gangs. Nigel de Jong, van Buyten and van Bommel would have their own martial arts group going in a corner of the prison yard.
 

RobinLFC

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Too many hotheads in here, they'd constantly be in trouble. I think you'd have to be much more sly and level-headed to survive in there.

Fernandinho and Fabinho would get away with a lot.
 

Chipper

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James Milner, Paul Scholes, Gareth Barry etc.

Not going for the intimidating tough guy angle if that wasn't already obvious. Quiet blokes who just get on with it stay out of trouble would do well I reckon.
 

OleBoiii

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Juan Mata.

His likability would immediately make him friends with whoever runs the prison. Since he's tiny he'll be protected at all cost while he spends his time studying law in the prison library. He'll immediately pass the exam once he's released and spend the rest of his life fighting for the little man.

I'm sending the script to HBO as we speak, btw.
 

GenZRed

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No offense to the OP, but you can tell football is off with threads like this.

So many threads popping up that otherwise wouldn't.

Again, no offense intended towards anybody. Good to see people being imaginative with creating new threads though.
 

Champagne Football

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If it was Shawshank then -
Carrick would be Andy
Chris Houghton would be Red
Lee Bowyer would be Heywood
Freddie Ljungberg would be Bogs and Robbie Savage and Andy Johnson would complete the sisters


Jose would be Warden Norton
Zlatan would be Captain Hadley

If it was the Green Mile then Lukaku or Heskey
 
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Kostur

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No offense to the OP, but you can tell football is off with threads like this.

So many threads popping up that otherwise wouldn't.

Again, no offense intended towards anybody. Good to see people being imaginative with creating new threads though.
Party pooper has entered the building lads, pack your shit.
 

Redcy

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Martin Keown listen to his stories with Bentley
Cygan apparently a bit of a scrapper him and Kolo Toure went at it a few times in training.
 

Henrik Larsson

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Juan Mata.

His likability would immediately make him friends with whoever runs the prison. Since he's tiny he'll be protected at all cost while he spends his time studying law in the prison library. He'll immediately pass the exam once he's released and spend the rest of his life fighting for the little man.

I'm sending the script to HBO as we speak, btw.
Funnily enough HBO once had a fantastic prison show called "Oz" and I've always strongly felt that one of the main characters really looked like Juan Mata. Though I guess what happened to poor Tobias Beecher in the series was a little more grim than what you're describing.

 

SirAF

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Juan Mata.

His likability would immediately make him friends with whoever runs the prison. Since he's tiny he'll be protected at all cost while he spends his time studying law in the prison library. He'll immediately pass the exam once he's released and spend the rest of his life fighting for the little man.

I'm sending the script to HBO as we speak, btw.
This is a light version of OZ :D
 

OleBoiii

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Funnily enough HBO once had a fantastic prison show called "Oz" and I've always strongly felt that one of the main characters really looked like Juan Mata. Though I guess what happened to poor Tobias Beecher in the series was a little more grim than what you're describing.

This is a light version of OZ :D
Damn, I just reinvented the wheel.

But at least I haven't seen this "wheel", so I'm still a genius :lol: