Let's all laugh at the F1 Thread

[SirAnderson]

Surely in contention for worst or best thread of 2021. and posts in it a right up there for nominations as well.

What a trip it has been, it honestly went toe to toe with the sport itself and surely came out the winner in terms of entertainment. (Not for those heavily invested of course)

Over the cause of the next few hours, let us post some gems that stand out.

In no particular order or allegiance to a driver/team, the stand out performers for me include, but not limited to:


@ArjenIsM3
@hobbers
@Jerch
@Fluctuation0161
@The Hilton

Thanks for the laughs this season!

Some very early front runners for this season stand out performers. Looking forward to the awards end of the season.

@ArjenIsM3 impressively/shamelessly (take your pick) picking off where he left it. Bravo sir, keep it up.

A new kid on the block @Asger has come storming in, taking on multiple posters at a time.
Will he be able to maintain this form?
Or will our regulars @hobbers @mariachi-19 and company give him a run for his money?

Will the resurgence of Ferrari bring some closest ultra fanbois out of hiding?

Stay tuned, all shall be reveal!

 

[ArjenIsM3]

What have I done wrong now? Honestly there's a lot of Merc/Hamilton fans in the F1 thread talking shite and being so one sided, if it had been the other way around.. well. You can imagine.

 

[VorZakone]

What have I done wrong now? Honestly there's a lot of Merc/Hamilton fans in the F1 thread talking shite and being so one sided, if it had been the other way around.. well. You can imagine.

We're all just having a laugh mate.

 

[Redlambs]

It's already great entertainment.

 

[Amar__]

I am guessing everyone who isn't Hamilton fan will be tagged here during some point of the season, right?

 

[SirAnderson]

I am guessing everyone who isn't Hamilton fan will be tagged here during some point of the season, right?

I'm not a respecter of persons, I just see the ones who stand out the most. Feel free to point me to any that fit the bill

 

[Amar__]

I'm not a respecter of persons, I just see the ones who stand out the most. Feel free to point me to any that fit the bill

By the looks of it, it seems that you've skipped everyone who has celebrated Red Bull's lack of luck today(it's basically like celebrating an injury in football), and tagged everyone who isn't fan of Hamilton, or doesn't think Verstappen is a cnut.

 

[SirAnderson]

By the looks of it, it seems that you've skipped everyone who has celebrated Red Bull's lack of luck today(it's basically like celebrating an injury in football), and tagged everyone who isn't fan of Hamilton, or doesn't think Verstappen is a cnut.

You serious?
Please, feel free to tag them, happy to laugh at it too.

 

[Buster15]

Some very early front runners for this season stand out performers. Looking forward to the awards end of the season.

@ArjenIsM3 impressively/shamelessly (take your pick) picking off where he left it. Bravo sir, keep it up.

A new kid on the block @Asger has come storming in, taking on multiple posters at a time.
Will he be able to maintain this form?
Or will our regulars @hobbers @mariachi-19 and company give him a run for his money?

Will the resurgence of Ferrari bring some closest ultra fanbois out of hiding?

Stay tuned, all shall be reveal!

Oi. I am feeling a bit left out.

 

[Amar__]

You serious?
Please, feel free to tag them, happy to laugh at it too.

It probably even costs even more tbf. Racing incidents are one thing, but failed fuel pumps, flat tires, etc. and things like that are just lack of luck that really shouldn't be celebrated, IMO.

 

[Redlambs]

By the looks of it, it seems that you've skipped everyone who has celebrated Red Bull's lack of luck today(it's basically like celebrating an injury in football), and tagged everyone who isn't fan of Hamilton, or doesn't think Verstappen is a cnut.

You'll do well this year!

 

[Moby]

It probably even costs even more tbf. Racing incidents are one thing, but failed fuel pumps, flat tires, etc. and things like that are just lack of luck that really shouldn't be celebrated, IMO.

Thoughts and prayers

 

[Amar__]

You'll do well this year!

I am actually Ferrari fanboy, have been since the Schumacher days, so I am supposed to hate Red Bull anyway.

 

[Redlambs]

I am actually Ferrari fanboy, have been since the Schumacher days, so I am suppsed to hate Red Bull anyway.

We are all Ferrari fanboys this year!

We don't all post such sad drivel though. Step up your game, or enjoy your team. Either way, make it interesting!

 

[christy87]

You serious?
Please, feel free to tag them, happy to laugh at it too.

Hope this happens to Verstappen in every race. The cnut.

Here you asked for it

 

[Amar__]

Here we go:

Lewis was winning the gp and would have finished first if massi hadn't made up rules on the last lap.... what more do you expect... he didn't misinterprate the rules or go full on cheating whichever it was that made him do what horner told him

@Redlambs Am I doing this right?

 

[horsechoker]

Do F1 fans even support their local luxury car manufacturer?

 

[mitChley]

Do F1 fans even support their local luxury car manufacturer?

Or your local CNC manufacturer

 

[mariachi-19]

Or your local CNC manufacturer

Do you support your local tobacco company?

 

[Sandyman]

We have so many ABMs and ABHs.

The solution is simple - get behind Ferrari for this season

 

[Schmiznurf]

I laugh at people who like F1 already, such a boring "sport".

 

[WeePat]

I laugh at people who like F1 already, such a boring "sport".

People say that about any sport they don't understand.

 

[Schmiznurf]

People say that about any sport they don't understand.

It's driving in laps, it's not hard to understand.

 

[hellhunter]

It's driving in laps, it's not hard to understand.

Well done on proving his point

 

[Schmiznurf]

Well done on proving his point

Go on then, what else do they do besides drive in laps around courses? Enlighten me as to the complexities of the great sport where people drive around laps trying to be faster and finish before others.

 

[SirAnderson]

Go on then, what else do they do besides drive in laps around courses? Enlighten me as to the complexities of the great sport where people drive around laps trying to be faster and finish before others.

Go make your own thread should you wish for enlightenment and not clutter this one please. We here to laugh.

 

[rimaldo]

Go on then, what else do they do besides drive in laps around courses? Enlighten me as to the complexities of the great sport where people drive around laps trying to be faster and finish before others.

jesus christ. there’s always someone that you need to spoon feed. they don’t “just have to drive around in circles.” they also have to stop their cars precisely in grid boxes and pit lanes. sounds easy still? the visibility from the cockpit is shocking.

they also need to be able to give really bland interviews pre and post race. they make sacrifices. they have to keep themselves small so they can fit into the cars. hamilton used to be a basket baller but had a procedure to attach his feet to this knee stumps so he could fit.

 

[The Firestarter]

It's driving in laps, it's not hard to understand.

 

[hobbers]

Football is just kicking a ball in between some lines. Pointless.

 

[SirAnderson]

Another scintillating week of F1 threading has just come to and end and the post-race discussion is just getting started.

I don't think anyone would argue that the utter dominance of @James Peril to take the 1st place thread Podium, is utterly deserving. Outstanding performance.

@Kevin comes in with our fastest lap with this quick fire double gems.

Max the KING, he rules over small fry like leclerc and hamilton. What a world champion.

What a king. World champion for a reason. Destroyed leclerc. Small fry talent compared to him.

@Rooney1987 spoilt what would have been a clean sweep of achievements for James Peril, with this absolutely nasty burrrrrn. How could you deprive him Rooney...

This you bro?

Some honorable mentions of those Hamilton fans still sore whenever they see the words Max and Champion together...and then can't help but respond with words like "Masi" "Maxstrics" "Cheat".

All in all, another excellent F1 thread weekend.


PS: a shout out to @rimaldo brundle for his peerless F1 commentary.
Second to none.
Poignant response to some F1 thread rumors...

feck. monaco is literally f1. get rid of that and you may as well just decide whom wins the championship on a whim at the end of the season. crazy talk.

Commentary on the on going mercedes crisis well summarized...

the main problem for mercedes is their engine. there are a lot of wannabe engineers thinking they know what they talking about with their purposing and airo mumbo jimbo but the real reason russell and hamilton’s heads are bobbing up and down on the straights is that they’re having to fred flintstone their car to try and get any speed up. it’s just their heads bobbing as a result of their running. you try and run fast whilst keeping the top half of your body completely still. it’s impossible.

Some in race thread controversy easily explained...really guys, it's just too easy for rimalo brundle, give him some harder questions next time.

no, you need to allow any of the car alongside you, not all the car alongside you.

Please don't forget to vote for your F1 threader of the day!

 

[hellhunter]

I really like your write-ups

 

[SirAnderson]

I really like your write-ups

I'd probably not bother watching F1 if I didn't follow it together with the Cafe F1 thread. It makes the sport

 

[rimaldo]

PS: a shout out to @rimaldo brundle for his peerless F1 commentary.
Second to none.
Poignant response to some F1 thread rumors...


Commentary on the on going mercedes crisis well summarized...


Some in race thread controversy easily explained...really guys, it's just too easy for rimalo brundle, give him some harder questions next time.



Please don't forget to vote for your F1 threader of the day!

i have a slight advantage due to my f1 background. i don’t want to say too much but all i’ll say is that i’ve never seen me and johnny pervert in the same room at the same time.

 

[Amar__]

i have a slight advantage due to my f1 background. i don’t want to say too much but all i’ll say is that i’ve never seen me and johnny pervert in the same room at the same time.

I knew you get your information somewhere, my first guess was that you have someone from Jamaican F1 delegation giving you information.

 

[rimaldo]

I knew you get your information somewhere, my first guess was that you have someone from Jamaican F1 delegation giving you information.

as you mention it, i just spoke to someone from the jamaica delegation and as it has been suggested, max does have mental health issues. in fact, the official stated the condition and it is the same disorder that i suffer from. he said they have had to be patient with him and supportive. he also stated that the medications that he has to take are stimulants and may result in adverse analytical findings if he takes them while driving (he opted not to to continue his crashing) which has resulted in his struggles. the individual did not have to tell me. for years people called me lackadaisical and disinterested in not crashing. i now have 2 masters degrees in not crashing but i am a lot older than max and i am more concerned with what will happen once f1 stops because f1 is a great outlet when dealing with mental health issues.

 

[Amar__]

as you mention it, i just spoke to someone from the jamaica delegation and as it has been suggested, max does have mental health issues. in fact, the official stated the condition and it is the same disorder that i suffer from. he said they have had to be patient with him and supportive. he also stated that the medications that he has to take are stimulants and may result in adverse analytical findings if he takes them while driving (he opted not to to continue his crashing) which has resulted in his struggles. the individual did not have to tell me. for years people called me lackadaisical and disinterested in not crashing. i now have 2 masters degrees in not crashing but i am a lot older than max and i am more concerned with what will happen once f1 stops because f1 is a great outlet when dealing with mental health issues.

I like how you replaced all capital letters.

 

[hellhunter]

@SirAnderson waiting for the update

 

[SirAnderson]

@SirAnderson waiting for the update

Will comb through the content today, can't wait!

 

[SirAnderson]

Down under has come and gone, and once again, has not left us disappointed.
So without further ado...let's get in!

First and foremost, an acknowledgement of the innocence of posters like @oates , it very important!

...if you don't appreciate a driver being frustrated when things don't go their way not to express that then you have an ulterior motive is all I can think.

The digs this race have been relentless and you do have to start wondering I'm afraid.

You may stop wondering, the answer is clearly that there is certainly NO ulterior motive of ANY of the rabid posters in the F1 thread, ALL of them have pure unbiased view of all thing Formula 1.

Which means, our outright winner for today, taking the fastest lap with him...Unrivaled in his objectivity and could even be classed as the epitome of one who has no ulterior motive, goes to none other than @mariachi-19
Well done to you sir! It would seem a combination of last weeks front runners dropping off the pace and your sheer determination, have clinched it for you today!

We do however, wish James Peril and Kevin a speedy recovery, and hope to see them back at it in no time!

On that note, I do have it on good authority, in fact, someone from the Jamaican delegation informed me that @Kevin 's absence in this week's thread is due to him being held back by Airport security for trying to force himself on a plane to Australia with life size cutout of Leclerc and the words "small fry" marked all over the cutouts face. Come back soon buddy.


Alas, we digress, it is important to note just how our Poster of the day staved off any would be challenger for his crown!

At this point, @hobbers primary objective in the F1 thread is bring out Hamilton fans in their numbers to his defend his behavior or lack thereof, but hopefully next time he can get them to actually take out handbags instead of just placing him on ignore! Rooting for you mate!

Next up is giorno...

Max has to be the luckiest sumbitch in the world ffs

Such a pity about Sainz. Doesn't matter anyways, Max will get another SC at juuuust the right time to change tyres while Charles can't and win the race again

ffs

Max DNF...

YESSSSSSSS MWAHAHAHAHAHAGA YEEEEEESSSSSSSSS

I'll admit, this is a surprising addition. Usually he is a contender for Best Non-Utd Poster and not for the F1 thread! So Sevilla @duffer will be pleased to see a potential rival dent his chances at that award!

Our Real Madrid poster clearly showing just how much more he loves sticking it to Max than seeing his own team win! Has anyone EVER seen him celebrate so exuberantly, I certainly haven't! @carvajal can confirm.

One might even need to report him for taking so much pleasure in Max's failure...after all, it's basically like celebrating an injury! I'll leave that for you to report @Amar__ I'm assuming the below post is still valid?

everyone who has celebrated Red Bull's lack of luck today(it's basically like celebrating an injury in football)

Judging but how the season is going for Redbull (Max) so far, there will be quite a bit of reporting to be done!

Nice to see some new Ferrari fans sticking out their heads now!

LeClerc is a boss!

Although Kevin disagrees.

On to the driver of the day...

But then again my team just won the gp at a canter so why do I care?

I usually try to take people at their word, but then you know...

This...

Welcome to the last 15 years. He hasn’t stopped whinging since he entered the sport which is why people don’t like him.
it get 10x as bad when he’s challenged by his team mates or doesn’t have the quickest car.

This...

If you’re inferring that I’m being racist, you need to have a word with yourself.
Perhaps you should see the shit Schumacher kopped during his career from British fans before you open your mouth

This...

What utter crap.

Non-merc/Hamilton fans have had to listen to absolute dribble about how good he is for the last 8 years and then after the finale last year, the bullshit being slung at Max despite winning the title on merit.

There’s no ulterior motive, Merc/Ham fans are just about to kop the same bullshit they’ve dished out for the last 8 years and it’s time to wear the pain.

As a Ferrari fan we’ve had it since 2007 and even before that in 2005/2006.

I'd go on but I think the point is quite clear...100% nothing to see here, he definitely doesn't care at all, not one bit!

To end off, @Withnail a point of correction. The word is indeed dribble, not drivel.

Non-merc/Hamilton fans have had to listen to absolute dribble about how good he is for the last 8 years

Any of you guys suffer from it? You think you've shaken everything out after a pee but once tucked in it keeps flowing. I hate it.

@Stanley Road, as our resident dribble expert, would you be so kind as to explain the F1 dribble phenomenon that mariachi has experienced, seems to have occurred in the F1 thread over the last 8 years! Our question is, how is it possible to HEAR dribble!?
For those interested in learning more about dribble, please follow Stanley's Expert opinions in the thread below.
https://www.redcafe.net/threads/older-fellas-dribble-d1ck.464503/

Thanks again to all our contenders, feel free to mention any worthy posts that deserve to be in this thread!

PS: We cannot, in good conscience, sign off without another @rimaldo brundle insight of the day:

latifi is a joke.

as is stroll.

 

[hellhunter]

Down under has come and gone, and once again, has not left us disappointed.
So without further ado...let's get in!

First and foremost, an acknowledgement of the innocence of posters like @oates , it very important!


You may stop wondering, the answer is clearly that there is certainly NO ulterior motive of ANY of the rabid posters in the F1 thread, ALL of them have pure unbiased view of all thing Formula 1.

Which means, our outright winner for today, taking the fastest lap with him...Unrivaled in his objectivity and could even be classed as the epitome of one who has no ulterior motive, goes to none other than @mariachi-19
Well done to you sir! It would seem a combination of last weeks front runners dropping off the pace and your sheer determination, have clinched it for you today!

We do however, wish James Peril and Kevin a speedy recovery, and hope to see them back at it in no time!

On that note, I do have it on good authority, in fact, someone from the Jamaican delegation informed me that @Kevin 's absence in this week's thread is due to him being held back by Airport security for trying to force himself on a plane to Australia with life size cutout of Leclerc and the words "small fry" marked all over the cutouts face. Come back soon buddy.


Alas, we digress, it is important to note just how our Poster of the day staved off any would be challenger for his crown!

At this point, @hobbers primary objective in the F1 thread is bring out Hamilton fans in their numbers to his defend his behavior or lack thereof, but hopefully next time he can get them to actually take out handbags instead of just placing him on ignore! Rooting for you mate!

Next up is giorno...


Max DNF...


I'll admit, this is a surprising addition. Usually he is a contender for Best Non-Utd Poster and not for the F1 thread! So Sevilla @duffer will be pleased to see a potential rival dent his chances at that award!

Our Real Madrid poster clearly showing just how much more he loves sticking it to Max than seeing his own team win! Has anyone EVER seen him celebrate so exuberantly, I certainly haven't! @carvajal can confirm.

One might even need to report him for taking so much pleasure in Max's failure...after all, it's basically like celebrating an injury! I'll leave that for you to report @Amar__ I'm assuming the below post is still valid?

Judging but how the season is going for Redbull (Max) so far, there will be quite a bit of reporting to be done!

Nice to see some new Ferrari fans sticking out their heads now!

Although Kevin disagrees.

On to the driver of the day...



I usually try to take people at their word, but then you know...

This...


This...


This...

I'd go on but I think the point is quite clear...100% nothing to see here, he definitely doesn't care at all, not one bit!

To end off, @Withnail a point of correction. The word is indeed dribble, not drivel.



@Stanley Road, as our resident dribble expert, would you be so kind as to explain the F1 dribble phenomenon that mariachi has experienced, seems to have occurred in the F1 thread over the last 8 years! Our question is, how is it possible to HEAR dribble!?
For those interested in learning more about dribble, please follow Stanley's Expert opinions in the thread below.
https://www.redcafe.net/threads/older-fellas-dribble-d1ck.464503/

Thanks again to all our contenders, feel free to mention any worthy posts that deserve to be in this thread!

PS: We cannot, in good conscience, sign off without another @rimaldo brundle insight of the day:

Worth the wait, good job mate