Did you really just ask Rimaldo to do you?
Be very careful young one, the Doc can't help you now.
poster origins
- Thread starter rimaldo
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girish - indian for "i like to have my picture taken with my male conquests" a dangerously homosexual man. he grew up in the outskirts of mumbai and some say he was an extra on slumdog millionaire. others say that just because he was quickly seen in an unfortunate a pan shot bumming a small boy in one of the deleted scenes on the dvd it does not mean he was an extra in the film as it was cut from the final production. the forests of india are his favourite location for the love making between males he is so fond of. many pictures are found of him with his lovers on the internet. the "i want your pictures" thread is the best place to find these. girish. he may be a gay indian, but he's our gay indian.
brilliant"A dangerously homosexual man"
I know what I asked, and I meant it 
the flying potato - england's very own answer to the flying fox. a masked maniac who prowls the gardens of south eastern england looking in compost heaps for discarded vegetable peelings. peelings he believes hold the secret to eternal life and youth. he is wrong of course as the flying fox will tell you. running around on all fours like a dog he is often seen stuffing rotting organic matter into any available orifice, just hoping that one day he'll have enough of it in his body to live forever. medical science has told him numerous times that his goals are impossible. some say he actually believes them. he just wants an excuse to shove vegetation into his bum hole.
How on earth are you able to type them up so quickly rimaldo?
fecking hell
"up into his bum hole"
"up into his bum hole"
good work rimaldo, some fantastic lines in there
Some classic stuff in here
boothy - quite simply a pun on the place he was conceived. a booth in a seedy lap dancing club with a trucker who had enough cash to get happy times with the tuesday day time dancer who was passed her best and needed money for a hip operation to replace the hips she has worn down after 42 years of gyrating them into the faces of men. you could tell the long years of this had taken a horrible affect on her body. the sagging breasts, the wrinkly skin, the constant smell of semen, all tell tale signs that she maybe should have hung up her stockings years ago. 16 years on boothy still doesn't know the identity of his father. 15 years on his mother is still stripping.
with my hands.
Do me! But i'd doubt there would be anything funny to write about me.
moses - biblical figure. this man was the first to inhabit the earth in the garden of eden. he wandered around this utopia and got so very lonely. he'd been with every animal under the sun and wanted one that looked more like him. he confided in god, who in exchange for one of his testicles, moulded him a female companion. one balled moses lived forever with his wife eve and after many years of begging god finally got the internet. ever since he has posted on this site. ever since he has been shoving kidney beans into his scrotum to make him seem a normal man again.
r.nilsson7 - a dark secret shames nilsson. a secret so dark he is unable to type all of it. just the first letter in fact. for he was christened rasmus by his loving parents who decided it during a game of truth or dare. his dad wasn't prepared to answer the question of "have you ever had sex with anything else other than a women" so had to forfeit a dare. this name has been nothing but a curse for poor r.nilsson as it has lead to a prolonged drought of women and the ridicule of his peers and lack of friends has turned him to confide himself to his bedroom, giving names to his teddy bears and eking out a semblance of a normal existence by talking to them and imagining them as real.
Do one of me too Rimaldo.
Very good.
Jesus hes on fire!!!!
Espada's one is fantastic.
Espada's one is fantastic.
devil_forever - a maritime sailor who was exiled from the navy for being a gay. as brass eye clearly informs us "gays can't swim, they attract enemy radar, they attract sharks, they nudge people when they're trying to shoot, ... imagine... the fear... when you go to sleep with a gay man on board and think "oh god, when i wake up, will everyone be dead?" you can't run a ship like that." assimilating into society once more was hard for this lifelong sailor and captains first mate. watching captain pugwash over and over again helped but didn’t quite give devil_forver the cure he desired for his sea lust. so he joined the caf. the seemingly gay camaraderie appealed to him and reminded him of those long, jaunty sea adventures with nothing but a man's anus for company. he wanted to make everyone aware of his naval pedigree and choose the name weevils_forever. unfortunately it was just too long to be accepted and he choose devil_forever instead due to obvious united related reasons.
raven_blade - a complex origin fits this caf poster. during his adolescent years all he heard his uncle talk about was illegal cock fighting. the adrenaline rush of seeing two coks go at it until one was vanquished. raven_blade was particularly close to his uncle. it could have been because they shared a love of united, it could have been a result of many a drunken fondling after he returned from the pub but either way raven cherished him. he longed for affection from him and thought of no better way of pleasing his uncle than becoming a cock fighter. he trained hard for years and years until he felt ready for his first fight. he turned up at the locked warehouse and realised his mistake. these were chickens fighting one another to the death. not what he had imagined it to be. disillusioned with the world of cock fighting he set out to start his own sport. raven knife fighting. he'd train ravens, crows and rooks to fight one another in knifed combat. he devoted the next 5 years of his life to training them up to do so. his work has been hindered slightly by the fact he is yet to acquire one of these birds to train up let alone teach them to hold a blade. some say he's wasted his life. others agree.
when will we get one for Rimaldo himself
i will document mine tomorrow. it will be the total truth. just like all my other ones.
Rimaldo is aon a roll.
I bet he's on weed.
I bet he's on weed.
bored at work and gives me something to do.
these are great!
decotron - a 35 year old american man with not much of a life. he sits on the internet all day long debating transformers and his personal belief that the newly made films let down the original cartoon. he lives in his mother's basement which of course, is transformer themed. duvet sets, posters, memorabilia, the lot. over the years and many cardboard boxes and spare parts from washing machines later he has built himself his own transformers costume. he is decotron. he wears it every day and never leave his computer chair, even though the cardboard is sodden with body fluids. he only ever leaves his chair when he believes he has found new evidence in the press that locates the all spark. he sits reading the first letter of every line of every story until he can get some kind of conceivable location to go and search for the all spark, that is unless he isn’t grounded by his mother or still has chores around the house that need doing. over the years he has perfected the sound of the transformation used in the films. unfortunately the women don’t seem to be as turned on by it as he does.
brilliant stuff rim!Good to have you back rim, where have you been?
feckin hell, That is brilliant.
If you were to write one for me, I'd guess this.
If you were to write one for me, I'd guess this.
cheers buddy. have been really busy at work and not really had a lot of time to get on in the evenings and have had a few internet related issues. namely lack of it for a couple of months. work's quietening up of late though so should be about more often.
Some imaginitive mind you have Rimmers.
Brilliant stuff mate.
Brilliant stuff mate.
fishfingers? there might just be something there i can work with you know.....
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