Blimey, he really said that. 
The Brendan & Gerrard Show
- Thread starter SteveJ
- Start date
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In the latest episode of the United Hour Podcast, Nik and Imran hold a long overdue conversation about United's awful league form with 1 win in 7. They discuss a disappointing draw at Bournemouth, a not so disappointing draw against Liverpool and a crushing defeat at Chelsea - Is time nearly over for Erik Ten Hag?
Then in a special second half of the pod, Nik welcomes Natalie ( https://twitter.com/natalie_17) to discuss the fortunes of Manchester United Women as they booked a place in the FA Cup Final after a historic first ever win vs. Chelsea.
Dive Bunny and the Mastermixers win, go 1 point behind Celtic. There could be a genuine title race!!!
The power oflove me
A force from above
Cleaning your soul
A Steven Gerrard inspired Rangers side kept the 'pressure' on Celtic as they came from behind to win 2-1.BrendanSteven praised his side's character and himself, but acknowledged that the first 45 minutes were poor and didn't represent Steven Gerrard well. Speaking to Rangers-backed media, Rangers TV (RT), Gerrard was in a festive mood, and believed that the turning point of the match was his half time team talk. "Clearly half time and my words were the turning point. Up until it then wasn't a Steven Gerrard team, it was a betrayal of my philosophy, and an insult to me, myself and I. I told my players that if they didn't improve I would bring myself on and it seemed to do the trick. We shouldn't have to work that hard to win at places like this [EvertonSt Johnstone]". St Johnstone were winning at half time, but they aren't going to win the league, so the three points would have been pointless for them anyway.
According to S*n sauces (BBQ), Gerrard mouthed something to his players.
Expert lip reader#1:- He clearly says "This doesn't slip"
Expert lip reader#2:- He clearly says "This form doesn't dip"
Expert lip reader#3:- He clearly says "Parsnip looks like chips"
The power of
A force from above
Cleaning your soul
A Steven Gerrard inspired Rangers side kept the 'pressure' on Celtic as they came from behind to win 2-1.
According to S*n sauces (BBQ), Gerrard mouthed something to his players.
Expert lip reader#1:- He clearly says "This doesn't slip"
Expert lip reader#2:- He clearly says "This form doesn't dip"
Expert lip reader#3:- He clearly says "Parsnip looks like chips"
"Up until it then wasn't a Steven Gerrard team, it was a betrayal of my philosophy, and an insult to me, myself and I. I told my players that if they didn't improve I would bring myself on and it seemed to do the trick"
I'm looking forward to the king's speech from The People's Brendan on Xmas Day Eve. Ahem...
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The King's Moan
A great big bell
"I made the first team and myself, Brendan Rodgers Trademark Pending, go to a Glasgow childrens' hospital tonight. We were like the twelve wise men, humbly bestowing magnificent photo-opportunistic Christmas gifts to those worse off than ourselves, like skint kids or Jose Mourinho. But when I appeared as if by royal magic at thestable bedside of one of those unwell 'kids', to my horror, lying in wait was my nemesis Steven Gerrard(!) I nearly fell off me stilts in shock.
'You're not Jesus!' I said heatedly, 'What are you foing here?!?', I mistyped, as he tore off his facial bandage hoodie to reveal big pointy teeth. 'You're taking up a valuable NHS bed, Granny. I mean, Steven!' I shouted quietly, as I don't like to draw attention to myself. Instead of explaining himself, he read a bunch of managerial clichés which he'd written in biro on his hand, as he does after every Rangers match. And also before and at halftime:
'We're not getting carried away. There are bigger challenges ahead. No disrespect to our opponents but they're no-mark tramps and I'm the celebrated Amadeus Gerrard.' And on he bored...'I'm only here because of the bad back which caused My Unfortunate Slip.'
I, Brendan X. Rodgers, replied in anger: 'Look 'ere, Red Sliding Hood - I've dragged meself away from a golf club Christmas dinner and disco to lob presents at sick kids only to find YOU invading every part of my life. It's like you're obsessed! Even my fiance Babycham has taken down her Gerrard poster from the headboard in protest!'
'I know your fiance intimately,' he sneered, 'She's been 'round the block more often than Pokemon Go. Anyway, just wait until December the 29th, when your team of expensive imports from the Isle of Man get turned over at Ibrox Petting Zoo and Athletics Stadium™. Look on my works, ye mighty etc etc.'
I departed with a contemptuous turn on cuban heels and a special-effects swirl of my kingly cape. He's bloody ruined my Christmas, the bastid. I'd text Jurgen about it but he keeps changing his phone number... "
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Rangers v Celtic, 12.30pm December 29th, ITVBe.
A great big bell
"I made the first team and myself, Brendan Rodgers Trademark Pending, go to a Glasgow childrens' hospital tonight. We were like the twelve wise men, humbly bestowing magnificent photo-opportunistic Christmas gifts to those worse off than ourselves, like skint kids or Jose Mourinho. But when I appeared as if by royal magic at the
'You're not Jesus!' I said heatedly, 'What are you foing here?!?', I mistyped, as he tore off his facial bandage hoodie to reveal big pointy teeth. 'You're taking up a valuable NHS bed, Granny. I mean, Steven!' I shouted quietly, as I don't like to draw attention to myself. Instead of explaining himself, he read a bunch of managerial clichés which he'd written in biro on his hand, as he does after every Rangers match. And also before and at halftime:
'We're not getting carried away. There are bigger challenges ahead. No disrespect to our opponents but they're no-mark tramps and I'm the celebrated Amadeus Gerrard.' And on he bored...'I'm only here because of the bad back which caused My Unfortunate Slip.'
I, Brendan X. Rodgers, replied in anger: 'Look 'ere, Red Sliding Hood - I've dragged meself away from a golf club Christmas dinner and disco to lob presents at sick kids only to find YOU invading every part of my life. It's like you're obsessed! Even my fiance Babycham has taken down her Gerrard poster from the headboard in protest!'
'I know your fiance intimately,' he sneered, 'She's been 'round the block more often than Pokemon Go. Anyway, just wait until December the 29th, when your team of expensive imports from the Isle of Man get turned over at Ibrox Petting Zoo and Athletics Stadium™. Look on my works, ye mighty etc etc.'
I departed with a contemptuous turn on cuban heels and a special-effects swirl of my kingly cape. He's bloody ruined my Christmas, the bastid. I'd text Jurgen about it but he keeps changing his phone number... "
--------------------------------------
Rangers v Celtic, 12.30pm December 29th, ITVBe.
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"Do you like pina colada and getting caught in the rain, love?"
In between Loose Women and How the Grinch Stole Christmas (Jim Carrey version)
"Also available on Notflix. "
In between Loose Women and How the Grinch Stole Christmas (Jim Carrey version)
Scottish Sun said:
FT: Gerrard 1 Rodgers 0
Amadeus Gerrard said:
The Gerr-inch that stole the Old Firm Derby
You're a mean one,Mr Grinch Stevie G
Rangers are daring to dream and dreaming to dare, as Steven Gerrard and himself alone masterminded a 1-0 win over the Celtic Empire led by Brendan Rodgers PLC. It has been 29 years 7 hours and 15 days since Rangers took away 3 points from Celtic, and has now given Scotland a long awaited title challenge, not like in England where Liverpool won their first league title with an uncatchable 9 point gap and only 18 games to go
Inspirational Memes
A number of memes have been floating around Twitter (rumoured). One lovely meme involves the classic 'how am i doing boss' meme. The new updated version sees Gerrard's face(above) photoshopped onto Brendan's body looking to the heavens asking the late Walter Smith* 'how am I doing boss'.
Brendan Rodgers is ashamed of Brendan Rodgers
Brendan Rodgers Ltd (internally screaming) was understandably disappointed.
"Frankly Brendan Rodgers is disappointed with himself and his Celtic team. If I was my own boss i'd probably considering firing myself!! And as for my Celtic, i call that performance gross misconduct. I am going to need more than 3 fecking envelopes.
Steven Gerrard= A Man in Motion
I can see the music playin', i can see the banners fly, Feel like we're back again, and hope ridin' high. Gonna be your man in motion, all I need is a pair of wins. Take me where the future's lyin', St Celtic's DIRE!!
You're a mean one,
- The Guardian: Why Steven Gerrard winning the league could be problematic for Manchester United fans
- Daily Mail: Redcafe goes into MELTDOWN, AS WE USE CAPITAL LETTERS TO GET YOUR ATTENTION TO READ OUR CLICKBAIT STORY
- The Sun: Ex Liverpool player Raheem Sterling (incl. GUN TATTOO) doesn't have an opinion about the Old Firm Derby
- Daily Express: Gerrard's FINEST HOUR as Rangers close in on first title in 147 years. Just gerron with it!!!
- CelticFanTV: Cannae take the strain capt'n
Rangers are daring to dream and dreaming to dare, as Steven Gerrard and himself alone masterminded a 1-0 win over the Celtic Empire led by Brendan Rodgers PLC. It has been 29 years 7 hours and 15 days since Rangers took away 3 points from Celtic, and has now given Scotland a long awaited title challenge, not like in England where Liverpool won their first league title with an uncatchable 9 point gap and only 18 games to go
Inspirational Memes
A number of memes have been floating around Twitter (rumoured). One lovely meme involves the classic 'how am i doing boss' meme. The new updated version sees Gerrard's face(above) photoshopped onto Brendan's body looking to the heavens asking the late Walter Smith* 'how am I doing boss'.
Brendan Rodgers is ashamed of Brendan Rodgers
Brendan Rodgers Ltd (internally screaming) was understandably disappointed.
"Frankly Brendan Rodgers is disappointed with himself and his Celtic team. If I was my own boss i'd probably considering firing myself!! And as for my Celtic, i call that performance gross misconduct. I am going to need more than 3 fecking envelopes.
Steven Gerrard= A Man in Motion
I can see the music playin', i can see the banners fly, Feel like we're back again, and hope ridin' high. Gonna be your man in motion, all I need is a pair of wins. Take me where the future's lyin', St Celtic's DIRE!!
Fantastic work lads.
---------------
Christ.Gerrard said:
THE FALLOUT FROM THE BIG MATCH
Steven A. Gerrard: "Ever since I invented football, there's been millions of unworthy imposters trying to snatch the spotlight away from yours truly; Brendan Rodgers is all of them. I'm no psychiatrist but I'll have a crack at it: he's got Short Arse Syndrome. He's jealous of my achievements and my sporting legacy, unmatched since the days of the Olympics in ancient Greece. This latest triumph of mine only antagonises the festering wound in his psyche. So, spare a thought for Brendan Rodgers...I'd do the same but I'm busy thinking of me."
Brendan X. Rodgers: "Ever since I invented football, there's been millions of unworthy imposters trying to snatch the spotlight away from yours truly; Steven Gerrard is all of them. I'm no psychiatrist but I'll have a crack at it: he's got Brendan Rodgers Syndrome. He's jealous of my achievements and my cultural legacy: my revolutionary Tonterías formation; my league titles; my successes in Europe - my albums Dance Yourself Delusional and Disco 'Dan the Music Man topped the charts in Lithuania - and my harem of fiances. This latest noble defeat of mine only antagonises the festering wound in his psyche. So, spare a thought for Steven Gerrard; I'd do the same but I'm busy thinking of a tactical masterplan, like Eric B."
Steven A. Gerrard: "Ever since I invented football, there's been millions of unworthy imposters trying to snatch the spotlight away from yours truly; Brendan Rodgers is all of them. I'm no psychiatrist but I'll have a crack at it: he's got Short Arse Syndrome. He's jealous of my achievements and my sporting legacy, unmatched since the days of the Olympics in ancient Greece. This latest triumph of mine only antagonises the festering wound in his psyche. So, spare a thought for Brendan Rodgers...I'd do the same but I'm busy thinking of me."
Brendan X. Rodgers: "Ever since I invented football, there's been millions of unworthy imposters trying to snatch the spotlight away from yours truly; Steven Gerrard is all of them. I'm no psychiatrist but I'll have a crack at it: he's got Brendan Rodgers Syndrome. He's jealous of my achievements and my cultural legacy: my revolutionary Tonterías formation; my league titles; my successes in Europe - my albums Dance Yourself Delusional and Disco 'Dan the Music Man topped the charts in Lithuania - and my harem of fiances. This latest noble defeat of mine only antagonises the festering wound in his psyche. So, spare a thought for Steven Gerrard; I'd do the same but I'm busy thinking of a tactical masterplan, like Eric B."
--------------------------------
2019. A New Year, Not a new Stevie Me. We go again!
Pukahontas
Don't cry for me, I'm already dead...tired
Joe Worrall was pictured throwing up following Rangers' training in Tenerife as Steven Gerrard put his stars through a brutal running session.
Rangers are hard at work in Tenerife ahead of the second half of the Premiership season and it seems Gerrard is doubling down in his quest to wrestle the title away from Senator Rodgers and his Empire.
In his speech to the Rangers union, Steven Gerrard MBE CBA dismissed questions that his training session were too brutal. "People these days are so over sensitive. Fecking snowflakes. Such questions trigger me. One footballer throws up and all of a sudden I'm Scouse Felix Magath. Back in my day, before the 2006 Community Shield, I swam the fecking Mersey in my SG Liverpool tracksuit. Backstroke as well, not frontcrawl. Scouse oracle Phil Thompson once told me "no pain, no gain". That quote stuck with me. The more pain my Rangers team suffers now, the more gain they and myself get. They'll thank me at the end of the season when they get their winner's medals and see me lifting the trophy.
https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/joe-worrall-throws-up-rangers-13834357
Don't cry for me, I'm already dead...tired
Joe Worrall was pictured throwing up following Rangers' training in Tenerife as Steven Gerrard put his stars through a brutal running session.
Rangers are hard at work in Tenerife ahead of the second half of the Premiership season and it seems Gerrard is doubling down in his quest to wrestle the title away from Senator Rodgers and his Empire.
In his speech to the Rangers union, Steven Gerrard MBE CBA dismissed questions that his training session were too brutal. "People these days are so over sensitive. Fecking snowflakes. Such questions trigger me. One footballer throws up and all of a sudden I'm Scouse Felix Magath. Back in my day, before the 2006 Community Shield, I swam the fecking Mersey in my SG Liverpool tracksuit. Backstroke as well, not frontcrawl. Scouse oracle Phil Thompson once told me "no pain, no gain". That quote stuck with me. The more pain my Rangers team suffers now, the more gain they and myself get. They'll thank me at the end of the season when they get their winner's medals and see me lifting the trophy.
https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/joe-worrall-throws-up-rangers-13834357
When the days are dark and cold, I go here for the laughs at Steve Me Special.
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BRENDAN ON THE BRINK (Part 943)
MillionaireBruce Wayne Brendan Rodgers has been linked with the Leicester job(!)
The Foxes have struggled this season, under a manager whose name I can't remember.
Now, relentlessly ambitious Showbiz Brendan has generously recommended himself for that bloke's job.
In an exclusive interview with a disinterested taxi driver, Rodgers said: "I'm happy at Celtic and thanks for all the fish."
More shit news, posted in the formatting style of the Daily Star, as I steal it from other websites.
Millionaire
The Foxes have struggled this season, under a manager whose name I can't remember.
Now, relentlessly ambitious Showbiz Brendan has generously recommended himself for that bloke's job.
In an exclusive interview with a disinterested taxi driver, Rodgers said: "I'm happy at Celtic and thanks for all the fish."
More shit news, posted in the formatting style of the Daily Star, as I steal it from other websites.
Outgoing Celtic manager was met by club captain Scott brown and new star striker Timothy weah in his office today.
Weah spoke first, and reminded Rodgers that his father is George weah, 7 times, and then left.
Scott Brown then produced 3 envelopes;
“ right pal, inside these envelopes are the 3 clubs I believe are big enough fur you tae leave us, and also wans that are realistic fur yi. Leicester isnae wan ae them gaffer so yi can feck that idea right off”
Without batting a perfect eyelash (both length and darkness) Brendan said;
“Scott, the names inside the 3 envelopes are Barcelona, Real Madrid and Manchester United. I’m only a 9/10 for conversational Spanish based on my linguaphone exerts, and I don’t think the kop would be happy if I went and took over from Sir Alex Ferguson’s brigade”
Flabbergasted, brown leaves the envelopes on the table, positioned in such a way that Brendan can just make out the capital W which is at the start of each teams name.
Rodgers then Instructed his agent to contact the C.E.Os of west ham, wolves, Watford, werder Bremen and Wolfsburg to let them know that he definitely wasn’t interested in leaving Celtic for them.
“Can you make sure you contact Barcelona, Real Madrid and Man Utd aswell please, just incase Scott was having a bad day”
The rest of the morning consisted of Brendan selecting a bunch of his all time favourite XI made up of very specific criteria, including “best natural tan FC” “best looking lateral incisor FC” in which he named himself as player manager for both.
All eyes now turn to the recommencment of the Scottish premier league, where Brendan looks to ingrain Oliver Burke, some guy who played well in the Slovakian leagues and the future heir to wakanda in the same attacking outlet that already contains the leagues most in form player and a 9millon pound striker from PSG who isn’t George weahs son.
Weah spoke first, and reminded Rodgers that his father is George weah, 7 times, and then left.
Scott Brown then produced 3 envelopes;
“ right pal, inside these envelopes are the 3 clubs I believe are big enough fur you tae leave us, and also wans that are realistic fur yi. Leicester isnae wan ae them gaffer so yi can feck that idea right off”
Without batting a perfect eyelash (both length and darkness) Brendan said;
“Scott, the names inside the 3 envelopes are Barcelona, Real Madrid and Manchester United. I’m only a 9/10 for conversational Spanish based on my linguaphone exerts, and I don’t think the kop would be happy if I went and took over from Sir Alex Ferguson’s brigade”
Flabbergasted, brown leaves the envelopes on the table, positioned in such a way that Brendan can just make out the capital W which is at the start of each teams name.
Rodgers then Instructed his agent to contact the C.E.Os of west ham, wolves, Watford, werder Bremen and Wolfsburg to let them know that he definitely wasn’t interested in leaving Celtic for them.
“Can you make sure you contact Barcelona, Real Madrid and Man Utd aswell please, just incase Scott was having a bad day”
The rest of the morning consisted of Brendan selecting a bunch of his all time favourite XI made up of very specific criteria, including “best natural tan FC” “best looking lateral incisor FC” in which he named himself as player manager for both.
All eyes now turn to the recommencment of the Scottish premier league, where Brendan looks to ingrain Oliver Burke, some guy who played well in the Slovakian leagues and the future heir to wakanda in the same attacking outlet that already contains the leagues most in form player and a 9millon pound striker from PSG who isn’t George weahs son.
Surprised that Yorkshire pudding connoisseur Brendan Rodgers is not linked to the Huddersfield job
I'm thinking...that he's doing the linking.
Hello, I'm Mr Sregdor, I come er... from someplace far away! Yes, that'll do. Anyway, I... I say we invest in Brendan Rodgers back into the Premier League
Paid journalist/Brendan shill: I like the way Sregdor thinks
Steven Gerrard on Leeds spying
https://www.thesportsman.com/articl...their-views-on-marcelo-bielsa-s-spying-antics
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
https://www.thesportsman.com/articl...their-views-on-marcelo-bielsa-s-spying-antics
This thread is genius. Why have I not read it before?
Celtic Casuals v Airdrieonians Knuckleheads
Celtic Boss Brendan Rodgers has given his thoughts on the pre and post game trouble between the two sets of fans.
Reporter: brendan, there’s a lot of rumours out there that Airdrie fans are simply Rangers fans who can’t afford the season tickets at Ibrox which -as you’ve told me 7 times going over the questions for this interview- are nowhere near as good value as a Season ticket to paradise. Just what do you make of the ugly scenes?
Brendan Rodgers: we were also discussing whether or not when you put this article in the paper, that you capitalize and bold the letters B and R throughout the article. Is your stance still the same?
Reporter: Yes it is, I won’t be doing that. My editor would fire me.
Rodgers: well then this interview is over. Tell your editor if he wants any more articles with MY name in them to come see me at the office. It’s on the top floor, last office on the right hand side. If he can’t find it just tell him to ask MY staff at reception where the office with the most square feet is.
Celtic Boss Brendan Rodgers has given his thoughts on the pre and post game trouble between the two sets of fans.
Reporter: brendan, there’s a lot of rumours out there that Airdrie fans are simply Rangers fans who can’t afford the season tickets at Ibrox which -as you’ve told me 7 times going over the questions for this interview- are nowhere near as good value as a Season ticket to paradise. Just what do you make of the ugly scenes?
Brendan Rodgers: we were also discussing whether or not when you put this article in the paper, that you capitalize and bold the letters B and R throughout the article. Is your stance still the same?
Reporter: Yes it is, I won’t be doing that. My editor would fire me.
Rodgers: well then this interview is over. Tell your editor if he wants any more articles with MY name in them to come see me at the office. It’s on the top floor, last office on the right hand side. If he can’t find it just tell him to ask MY staff at reception where the office with the most square feet is.
Jabba spotted in Stevie's forehead.
Space criminal and Star Wars-star Jabba The Hutt has appeared in the lines of Steven Amadeus Gerrard's forehead for the first time since he kept Princess Leiva captured for sexual space activity.
The appearance of Jabba is seen (by many Glaswegian people, some conspiracists) as an escape act, but it is also fairly easy to read between the lines when it comes to Mr Gerrard's fantastic forehead.
Some believe that Jabba the Hutt (Not to be confused with Southampton manager Hassl the Hutt) has gone into the wrinkles because he thought Mozart was playing inside. Shockingly it has been reported that only "Another day in Paradise", "Against all odds" and "Easy Lover" is to be heard inside of the Liverpudlian mastermind. Friends of Mr Gerrard, have all confirmed that they have heard Phil Collins songs when standing close to Steven: "It's like we could all hear it, la, but there was this sort of big reverb coming out of of the skull too, which was not in the originals, knowamean?". Mythbusters have since debunked the myth, claiming it was mostly just Steven Gerrard humming the Collins-songs in an Enya kind of way.
Back to space gangster Jabba the Hutt, an anonymous insider has spoken to Daily Mail claiming the following was spoken:
"Dizze Dozzza na fafafafacking slip, la-zarrr"
It's unconfirmed whether the inner-voice was of Jabba the Hutt or Mr. Steven A. Gerrard.
In an interesting turn-around, major scientists have now claimed that Jabba did not go into the wrinkles by will, but was instead sucked down into the wrinkles, which have grown even bigger over the last couple of years. Bulgarian scientists believe that the lines of Steven Gerrard's face have a sort of black hole effect and that a lot of Galaxies (Samsung) have been lost in there over the years. Dr. Dimitri Berbatov says: "Like the Orion Belt, the 3 lines are always visible to everyone in the Glasgow area. The wrinkles suck everything of valuable life into them, turning them into a personality with prestige, honour and glory giving Steven the quality of always knowing and doing what is morally right. Also there's a great bar called Coco Beach Bar if you're ever in the Sunny beach-area."
Adding further to the conundrum is the fact that professional photoshoppers have all tried to retouch Steven's wrinkles, but none have been able to alter the lines. Instead their photoshop apps have all started to crash and their photoshop-tools in photoshop have all been sucked into and lost inside the black hole. It's even believed by some Liverpool residents that the title challenge of 14' was lost inside too.
Now they are stuck in my head. Thanks
Better than Princess (Lucas) Leiva in a golden bikiniNow they are stuck in my head. Thanks
BRODCAST
"Welcome to the Brendan Rodgers Podcast on Brendan Rodgers FM, with me Brendan Rodgers. Tonight my special guest is Steven Gerrard, who once served under me at everybody's favourite club, Liverpool. I'm overjoyed to see that you've recovered from that pesky 'bad back'."
"Good evening. It's a great honour for you to meet me."
"We've already met - I wouldn't be freezing me arse off here in Scotland if we hadn't 'met'."
"Don't let our great rivalry get under your tan, Mr Yesterday."
"Rivalry?!? You've won less than bloody Poch!"
"I've only been a manager for five minutes, and I've already beaten your donkey sanctuary of a club. If Hillary Clinton and the aliens hadn't corrupted the fixture list, I'd be a league champion right now."
"F*ck off, Slippy!"
*Brodcast ends*
"Welcome to the Brendan Rodgers Podcast on Brendan Rodgers FM, with me Brendan Rodgers. Tonight my special guest is Steven Gerrard, who once served under me at everybody's favourite club, Liverpool. I'm overjoyed to see that you've recovered from that pesky 'bad back'."
"Good evening. It's a great honour for you to meet me."
"We've already met - I wouldn't be freezing me arse off here in Scotland if we hadn't 'met'."
"Don't let our great rivalry get under your tan, Mr Yesterday."
"Rivalry?!? You've won less than bloody Poch!"
"I've only been a manager for five minutes, and I've already beaten your donkey sanctuary of a club. If Hillary Clinton and the aliens hadn't corrupted the fixture list, I'd be a league champion right now."
"F*ck off, Slippy!"
*Brodcast ends*
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