Who are the really stupid footballers?

Adam-Utd

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Aaron Wan Bissaka seems like an absolute tool
 

RedDevilMachine

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This is a pretty stupid thread.
Agreed. This is what happens when some people have too much free time. Anyway to answer the OP, Grealish is the one that comes to mind. Just watch a video of him where he can't even point out England on the map. Lad is lucky he made it in professional football or else he would be making minimum wage.
 

FrantikChicken

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This is a pretty stupid thread.
It’s always interesting how so many fans are very keen to call players stupid even though they’ve often never even heard them speak. It’s like some sort of superiority complex in order to make yourself feel better that someone else is more successful than you :houllier:
 

FrantikChicken

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Agreed. This is what happens when some people have too much free time. Anyway to answer the OP, Grealish is the one that comes to mind. Just watch a video of him where he can't even point out England on the map. Lad is lucky he made it in professional football or else he would be making minimum wage.
How exactly does memorising the visual location of a country point to higher intelligence than the spacial and physical intelligence required to play top level football?

maybe we need to define what intelligence actually means in this thread

EDIT:spelling
 

Mwooyo

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Mason Greenwood hands down. Kid had it all, amazing technique, amazing goal scorer, and the big contract. Could have any other girl he wanted but decided to risk all that for the one girl who says no. Whether guilty or innocent, it just doesnt make sense to risk it all. Am sure he never thought things would change completely for him within a few hours
 

Red Star One

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How exactly does memorising the visual location of a country point to higher intelligence than the spacial and physical intelligence required to play top level football?

maybe we need to define what intelligence actually means in this thread

EDIT:spelling
Perhaps we do, but not being able to point your own country on the map is quite an universal definition of stupid - especially if you can't justify it with lack of access to education
 

FrantikChicken

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Perhaps we do, but not being able to point your own country on the map is quite an universal definition of stupid - especially if you can't justify it with lack of access to education
But how is it stupid? In what way does knowing the world map make you more likely to be financially successful? Maybe Grealish will find it funny that most of us can’t keep a ball in the air for more than 3 touches?
 

Red Star One

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But how is it stupid? In what way does knowing the world map make you more likely to be financially successful? Maybe Grealish will find it funny that most of us can’t keep a ball in the air for more than 3 touches?
We operate on some generalisations here mate - everyone has their own definition of stupidity, for me intelligence has very little to do if you can be financially successful - you can be a criminal, instagram influencer, sexworker, a heir to fortune and still come across as a complete idiot, even if you made real money. I believe most here would describe stupidity as a mix of extreme ignorance / lack of knowledge considered basic (pointing your own country on the map is included here) + naivety + inability to manage your life / wasting the talent. To each their own. It's a matter of semantics and I think we're just having some fun here, I'd personally never call Balotelli stupid - for me he was immature and unprofessional, but not necessarily an idiot.
 

FrantikChicken

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We operate on some generalisations here mate - everyone has their own definition of stupidity, for me intelligence has very little to do if you can be financially successful - you can be a criminal, instagram influencer, sexworker, a heir to fortune and still come across as a complete idiot, even if you made real money. I believe most here would describe stupidity as a mix of extreme ignorance / lack of knowledge considered basic (pointing your own country on the map is included here) + naivety + inability to manage your life / wasting the talent. To each their own.
Sure, the original post I quoted said he’d be making minimal wage because he’s not intelligent. I’m pointing out that there’s plenty of highly intelligent people who have no idea how to make money.

I think the traditional idea of intelligence is a bit outdated tbh because even with something like being a successful criminal or instagram influencer, they’re not actually all that easy. You need to have a skill set and knowledge on how to navigate your space and be successful in it.
 

Spark

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Apparently Martial is really thick, according to a very tenuous link. Not saying it’s true, but when I asked for inside stories that’s what I got (2018 though!).
 

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A far more interesting question; who are the very smart players. Don't Leeds have some posh polyglot cnut up top?

Luuk de Jong is also a smart dude I think.
 

Red Star One

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A far more interesting question; who are the very smart players. Don't Leeds have some posh polyglot cnut up top?

Luuk de Jong is also a smart dude I think.
Again it depends on your definition of intelligence and being smart. Many people associate it with ability to speak a few languages (and I enjoy this definition as I could be categorized as smart myself lol), Lukaku always came across as very well-spoken and quite a polyglot, but can you really claim he's so intelligent after the trainwreck of his interviews? Easy answer is also Bamford that supposedly turned down a scholarship from Harvard in order to become average player and FPL troll.
Edit: Lampard had a rather high IQ, didn't he? Not that it really translates to intelligence.
Also Chiellini is a very smart and well educated guy, I'm used to Italians giving interviews with a language that makes me wish forget Italian at all (Donnarumma after 2020 triumph and his media presence had the vibe of a braindead guy, really) and Giorgio always seemed sharp.
 

horsechoker

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A far more interesting question; who are the very smart players. Don't Leeds have some posh polyglot cnut up top?

Luuk de Jong is also a smart dude I think.
Lukaku is a polyglot and probably quite clever with facts but emotionally he's very dim
 

Red Star One

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This is cute, didn't know that. Always though he is kind of average player and was surprised he's moving to City and even getting so many minutes there - perhaps it's down to him being a smart lad :lol: then again, you could have a long discussion whether such snap maths skills are really a sign of "intelligence".
 

Blackwidow

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Kai Havertz has the most stupid anecdote, that I'm aware of, to his name.
Kai Havertz has successfully finished his A-levels. He might not be "from this world" when it means practical wisdom... - but really stupid people have problems to finish the lowest levels of school. I guess we have to define here again what intelligence is. It is not school smartness, but stupid people have problems with school, too.
 

stefan92

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Kai Havertz has successfully finished his A-levels. He might not be "from this world" when it means practical wisdom... - but really stupid people have problems to finish the lowest levels of school. I guess we have to define here again what intelligence is. It is not school smartness, but stupid people have problems with school, too.
I guess Havertz is a good example for a young player who grew up a bit detached from reality, as you called it practical wisdom. I could never imagine seeing him driving a tractor on a farm like Haaland does in his holiday and dreaming of becoming a farmer in the future.

I think both are intelligent, but have had a much different youth.
 

HTG

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Ronaldo strikes me as the sort of dude who doesn’t even know how to open a book.
 

(...)

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A far more interesting question; who are the very smart players. Don't Leeds have some posh polyglot cnut up top?

Luuk de Jong is also a smart dude I think.
Flamini is now CEO of a biochemical startup he co-founded. Always thought he was one of the dumb ones, I was wrong.
 

KirkDuyt

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Flamini is now CEO of a biochemical startup he co-founded. Always thought he was one of the dumb ones, I was wrong.
Wow :lol:

Bloody hell, his company is worth 10 billion and he's the richtest player in the world :eek:
 

The Urban Goose

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El Hadji Diouf.

I was also going to lay into Harry Kewell, but I've just googled him and seen that he's still married to that actress after 20 years, so instead I'll just say good man.
 

Andersonson

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Martial, his early instagram was filled with him being blatantly stupid.

Why so many saying AWB, whats this based on?
 
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King Eric 7

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The one who is married to the most stupid WAG. He must be stupid by association. Especially after spunking so much money on legal fees.
 

Baxquux

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Top-flight footballers require above-average non-verbal reasoning skills (at speed, under pressure) and beyond that executive functioning. Part of the reason why English football on the whole fell behind is that coaching didn't systematically cultivate problem-solving, relying on 'instinct' and 'pashun!' -although 'instinct' itself obviously involves certain forms of quick computation, 'pitch pictures', visualizing multiple scenarios etc. Relatedly, footballers on average probably have better Maths skills than your average sample size.

The development of more general skills (verbal reasoning; acquisition of, i guess, semantic concepts, or whatever designation psychologists/neuroscientists would give to them; cultural breadth and general knowledge) is another matter, especially given footballers on average tend to have spent an inordinate amount of time...playing football or thinking about football strategies during their developmental years, rather than reading around subjects or gaining exposure to wider culture. Also a disproportionate amount of them grow up in working-class families where, again as a major generalization, there isn't as much exposure to reading or 'high culture', and a greater emphasis on practical, job-related skills (there are obviously plenty of exceptions, both in footballers economic backgrounds, and what a working-class family looks like).

Also you can cultivate both non-verbal and verbal skills to a level where you're formally intelligent, but still have awful judgement outside of those narrow game scenarios, whether it's a mensa test or the football pitch. Le Tissier is actually a classic example - multiple Countdown winner, supreme footballing vision, but a complete pillock with generally bad evaluative skills around conspiracy theories or politics in general...
 
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Forest Red

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Oli Burke - has the physical attributes to be a superstar but the footballing brain of a plant pot. Apparently before we flogged him for silly money to RB, he struggled to understand where to stand for a throw in. If Mongo from Blazing Saddles was a footballer!
 

Blackwidow

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It’s a bit cruel how you all German speakers joke about a tweet with a video in German (I can’t even translate that) with so many responses in that thread and nobody cared to translate the context of it :lol: what did he say and what’s that about?
Cut open a cool-pack (the ones with the blue chemical in it that you use for injuries) from the fridge in a hotel room and put it into a drink as he thought it was normal ice.
 

djd

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Was it Dameri Grey that almost walked into a helicopter rotor?
 

Strelok

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Gazza didn't actually do himself any favours. So much talent that went to waste and I'm talking during his career!
Yeah Gazza. I don't think he'd read much and how he ditched SAF and United for a couple pounds more. Or that Arsenal chap who let his wife took all his money and kick him out of the house.
 
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