Mister Jeebus
Full Member
This thread is inspired by the Giuliano Maiorana one. I posted it in the newbs when I was there, so apologies to anyone that's seen it before.
For every potential star from the academy such as Petrucci, King, Will Keane, and Ra'vel Morrison, there are ghosts of the next-big-things past to counsel against premature expectations.
I've chosen a first XI and 7 subs using a few criteria:
1) They came through the United youth system.
2) They need to have been hyped as the next big thing.
3) Their career is over, or nearly over.
4) They failed to live up to expectations.
Goalkeeper:
This is possibly the weakest position on the team, as we haven’t to my memory produced any keepers that were ever really described as the next big thing. I’ve plumped for Kevin Pilkington here. Although he only played 6 underwhelming games for United, it is more impressive than the approximately 1 second of first team action Nick Culkin managed in 7 seasons! Pilkington’s promising reputation took a nosedive when he was at fault for both goals in the FA Cup 3rd round match in the 95/96 season against Sunderland. He made no appearances the following season, and his final two games for United were consecutive matches in the 97/98 season in a defeat of Everton, and a 3-2 loss to Coventry memorable for Darren Huckerby waltzing though half our team in the last minute to score the winner.
United appearances/seasons: 8/6
United highlight: Keeping a clean sheet in a Boxing Day win against Everton in 97/98.
Where is he now? Eventually made a respectable career in the lower leagues with Mansfield and Notts County. In a cruel twist of fate he has now been usurped at County, by none other than the son of the Great Dane he couldn’t hold a candle to at United. Released just this month but has since been signed by Luton where he spent a brief loan spell during the season.
Full Backs
A position where United seem to produce an endless chain of supposed next big things. Of the current crop the Da Silvas look quite likely to be the real deal, but how about De Laet, who some on the Caf reckon to be an even better defender? Or will any of the three go the way of Danny Simpson, Phil Bardsley, Jonathan Spector, or Richard Eckersley? Even these latter four are still relatively young, so I have gone for mid-nineties starlets.
At right back Michael Clegg wins his place ahead of the older John O’Kane by virtue of his 15 league appearances to the latter’s 2. Something of a Gary Neville clone in both build and playing style, the latter of these attributes subsequently proved that we certainly are more than the product of our genes, as his career total of less than 100 professional appearances attests to.
United appearances/seasons: 15/6
United highlight: Playing in the 3-2 victory at Anfield in the 99/00 season.
Where is he now? Retired from football aged just 27 to follow in his father’s footsteps as a strength and conditioning coach and is currently working with Sunderland. Incidentally, his father Mike is employed in the same role with United.
At left back there was only one possible choice, and despite his career trajectory thereafter this player will always hold a warm place in United fans’ hearts after his winning goal in the 1990 FA Cup Final replay against Palace. Lee Martin (the original) is the elder statesman, and thus captain, of this team, and in fact was 22 when he scored that memorable goal. He scored only one other goal for United and rarely featured for the club in the 4 seasons following the cup win. However, his 109 appearances are more than his cumulative appearances at any of his subsequent clubs.
United appearances/seasons: 109/6
United highlight: Like you need to ask!
Where is he now? Retired from professional football aged 30 in 1998, although later played semi-pro in the League of Wales. Currently working with young people offering career and training advice.
Centre Halves
At the moment we are blessed with centre halves, and of the current squad both Evans and Brown came through the youth system. We have also produced, and hilariously made a fast buck on, some awful dross in this position. Paul McShane I’m looking at you. Furthermore, it is the one position on the pitch where if a player appears mature at 15 he is immediately rated as a future England captain. Still, having a hairy chest before you can legally have sex does not necessarily make for a prolonged career at the top. And the first of our centre halves can testify to that. John Curtis was regularly described exactly as above – future England captain. However, commanding displays in the 1995 FA Youth Cup winning team, as well as in England underage sides, did not translate into first team form. He made 4 league starts, 9 league appearances in total, during his 3 years in the first team squad, but as is often the case with young centre halves these were primarily at full back. A £1.5m transfer to Blackburn followed in 2000, but 78 appearances in 3 years did not augur well for a stable career. A journeyman career ensued, joining Northampton Town last summer, amazingly his 12th professional club. Although he started brightly, with 21 appearances for the Cobblers in the first half of the season, including 18 starts in the Fourth Division, he fell out of favour and was released from Sixfields this summer. We’ll see if a recent training spell with Gold Coast United in the AFL leads to a contract offer.
United appearances/seasons: 19/5
United highlight: 3 of his 4 league starts were in the 97/98 season, two against Barnsley, and the other being that painful 1-0 loss at home to Arsenal that effectively handed them the title. Still, he did start in the 7-0 trouncing of Barnsley, and he can’t but have enjoyed that leisurely stroll.
Where is he now? After slumming it in the nether regions of the Football League he has since pitched up down under. Hopefully he settles in the AFL because with the amount of clubs he’s had he must surely be living in a caravan.
Curtis’ defensive partner in the centre is, coincidentally, his former colleague in the Youth Team and Reserves. Ronnie Wallwork was, along with Curtis, part of England’s 1997 World Youth Championship squad, alongside other promising players such as Matthew Upson, Jamie Carragher, Danny Murphy, Kieron Dyer, and Michael Owen. Wallwork had greater longevity at United than Curtis, in part perhaps because of his greater versatility, often playing as a defensive midfielder throughout his career. Nevertheless, he started a mere 4 league games in 7 seasons for the club, appearing from the bench a further 15 times. As an aside he also managed to get banned for life, reduced on appeal, for attacking a referee whilst on loan to Antwerp, and he was also stabbed in a nightclub during a loan spell at Barnsley. So if nothing else he at least enlivens a dull night out.
United appearances/seasons: 28/7
United highlight: Made enough appearances in the 01/02 season to qualify for a Premier League medal. That’s one more than Steven Gerrard. How do you like them apples!
Where is he now? Joined West Brom in 2002, playing 107 games for them in 6 seasons, but after more bad loans than Lehman Brothers eventually found himself at Sheffield Wednesday. He only played 7 times for Wednesday and was released in May 2008. Has been without a club since then, and is currently running a clothes business in Failsworth (sounds like a retirement village for this team).
Right Wing
Terry Cooke was a small tricky winger who showed a huge amount of promise in his first couple of games – including one sublime flick and subsequent cross in the build up to a Giggs goal against Bolton – but he failed to start in his 4 further years at the club. His sunken cheekbones and dark eyes meant he bore a startling experience to a malnourished smackhead. Appropriately he signed for City after a reasonable loan spell with them, but it transpired that was but a cunning ploy from Agent Cooke to embezzle large sums of money out of them.
United appearances/seasons: 8/5.
United highlight: His one and only league start on his debut at Old Trafford in a 3-0 defeat of Bolton in the 95/96 season. A close second is his solitary United goal in his only other start for the club in a 3-1 win against York in the League Cup (an aggregate 3-4 loss following an embarrassing 3-0 defeat at Old Trafford).
Where is he now? Surprisingly enough had been busy outshining his more illustrious former digs mate playing in the MLS with the Colorado Rapids since 2005. However – let me put on my Stetson and ill-fitting Levis here – he was waived in summer 2009 by the Rapids, and after a trial with the Seattle Sounders came to nothing he missed the September 15th roster freeze date. Which I think means his contract wasn’t renewed and he has missed their transfer deadline day. After failing to win a contract following a brief trial at Nottingham Forest, he was most recently found slumming it down under with Robbie Fowler (now at Perth Glory) at North Queensland Fury.
Left Wing
Initially I thought this was a tight call. The Belgrade born Swede Bojan Djordjic joined United’s youth structure from IF Brommapojkarna as a 17 year old. Despite winning young player of the year in his first year with the club Bojan only made a paltry 2 appearances for United. And surely Keith Gillespie must be a shoe-in for this role? But no, he was only going to make the bench (which incidentally has three wingers, with another three in the starting XI - best not to give up the day job) but we found room for him elsewhere. Possibly the first name down on this team sheet, Ben Thornley was widely considered to be a star in the making, rated as highly as Ryan Giggs by some, yet more aggressive as well as two-footed. He made his first team debut during the first double winning season before fellow youth team stars such as David Beckham and Paul Scholes. Unfortunately, his career was blighted by serious injury, including one knee-shattering tackle in an April ’94 reserve game that led to a subsequent civil lawsuit against Blackburn’s Nicky Marker. I’m pissing in the wind here but because I can’t find the court case listed I’ll presume it was settled out of court.
United appearances/seasons: 14/7
United highlight: Very little to choose from here. Probably his one and only league start for United at Middlesbrough in a 2-2 draw in the 96/97 season.
Where is he now? Last seen playing with Witton Albion alongside little brother (and current United and England masseur) Rod in the Unibond Premier League. His contract expired last summer and he was released along with most of the Albion squad after the club’s relegation.
For every potential star from the academy such as Petrucci, King, Will Keane, and Ra'vel Morrison, there are ghosts of the next-big-things past to counsel against premature expectations.
I've chosen a first XI and 7 subs using a few criteria:
1) They came through the United youth system.
2) They need to have been hyped as the next big thing.
3) Their career is over, or nearly over.
4) They failed to live up to expectations.
Goalkeeper:
This is possibly the weakest position on the team, as we haven’t to my memory produced any keepers that were ever really described as the next big thing. I’ve plumped for Kevin Pilkington here. Although he only played 6 underwhelming games for United, it is more impressive than the approximately 1 second of first team action Nick Culkin managed in 7 seasons! Pilkington’s promising reputation took a nosedive when he was at fault for both goals in the FA Cup 3rd round match in the 95/96 season against Sunderland. He made no appearances the following season, and his final two games for United were consecutive matches in the 97/98 season in a defeat of Everton, and a 3-2 loss to Coventry memorable for Darren Huckerby waltzing though half our team in the last minute to score the winner.
United appearances/seasons: 8/6
United highlight: Keeping a clean sheet in a Boxing Day win against Everton in 97/98.
Where is he now? Eventually made a respectable career in the lower leagues with Mansfield and Notts County. In a cruel twist of fate he has now been usurped at County, by none other than the son of the Great Dane he couldn’t hold a candle to at United. Released just this month but has since been signed by Luton where he spent a brief loan spell during the season.
Full Backs
A position where United seem to produce an endless chain of supposed next big things. Of the current crop the Da Silvas look quite likely to be the real deal, but how about De Laet, who some on the Caf reckon to be an even better defender? Or will any of the three go the way of Danny Simpson, Phil Bardsley, Jonathan Spector, or Richard Eckersley? Even these latter four are still relatively young, so I have gone for mid-nineties starlets.
At right back Michael Clegg wins his place ahead of the older John O’Kane by virtue of his 15 league appearances to the latter’s 2. Something of a Gary Neville clone in both build and playing style, the latter of these attributes subsequently proved that we certainly are more than the product of our genes, as his career total of less than 100 professional appearances attests to.
United appearances/seasons: 15/6
United highlight: Playing in the 3-2 victory at Anfield in the 99/00 season.
Where is he now? Retired from football aged just 27 to follow in his father’s footsteps as a strength and conditioning coach and is currently working with Sunderland. Incidentally, his father Mike is employed in the same role with United.
At left back there was only one possible choice, and despite his career trajectory thereafter this player will always hold a warm place in United fans’ hearts after his winning goal in the 1990 FA Cup Final replay against Palace. Lee Martin (the original) is the elder statesman, and thus captain, of this team, and in fact was 22 when he scored that memorable goal. He scored only one other goal for United and rarely featured for the club in the 4 seasons following the cup win. However, his 109 appearances are more than his cumulative appearances at any of his subsequent clubs.
United appearances/seasons: 109/6
United highlight: Like you need to ask!
Where is he now? Retired from professional football aged 30 in 1998, although later played semi-pro in the League of Wales. Currently working with young people offering career and training advice.
Centre Halves
At the moment we are blessed with centre halves, and of the current squad both Evans and Brown came through the youth system. We have also produced, and hilariously made a fast buck on, some awful dross in this position. Paul McShane I’m looking at you. Furthermore, it is the one position on the pitch where if a player appears mature at 15 he is immediately rated as a future England captain. Still, having a hairy chest before you can legally have sex does not necessarily make for a prolonged career at the top. And the first of our centre halves can testify to that. John Curtis was regularly described exactly as above – future England captain. However, commanding displays in the 1995 FA Youth Cup winning team, as well as in England underage sides, did not translate into first team form. He made 4 league starts, 9 league appearances in total, during his 3 years in the first team squad, but as is often the case with young centre halves these were primarily at full back. A £1.5m transfer to Blackburn followed in 2000, but 78 appearances in 3 years did not augur well for a stable career. A journeyman career ensued, joining Northampton Town last summer, amazingly his 12th professional club. Although he started brightly, with 21 appearances for the Cobblers in the first half of the season, including 18 starts in the Fourth Division, he fell out of favour and was released from Sixfields this summer. We’ll see if a recent training spell with Gold Coast United in the AFL leads to a contract offer.
United appearances/seasons: 19/5
United highlight: 3 of his 4 league starts were in the 97/98 season, two against Barnsley, and the other being that painful 1-0 loss at home to Arsenal that effectively handed them the title. Still, he did start in the 7-0 trouncing of Barnsley, and he can’t but have enjoyed that leisurely stroll.
Where is he now? After slumming it in the nether regions of the Football League he has since pitched up down under. Hopefully he settles in the AFL because with the amount of clubs he’s had he must surely be living in a caravan.
Curtis’ defensive partner in the centre is, coincidentally, his former colleague in the Youth Team and Reserves. Ronnie Wallwork was, along with Curtis, part of England’s 1997 World Youth Championship squad, alongside other promising players such as Matthew Upson, Jamie Carragher, Danny Murphy, Kieron Dyer, and Michael Owen. Wallwork had greater longevity at United than Curtis, in part perhaps because of his greater versatility, often playing as a defensive midfielder throughout his career. Nevertheless, he started a mere 4 league games in 7 seasons for the club, appearing from the bench a further 15 times. As an aside he also managed to get banned for life, reduced on appeal, for attacking a referee whilst on loan to Antwerp, and he was also stabbed in a nightclub during a loan spell at Barnsley. So if nothing else he at least enlivens a dull night out.
United appearances/seasons: 28/7
United highlight: Made enough appearances in the 01/02 season to qualify for a Premier League medal. That’s one more than Steven Gerrard. How do you like them apples!
Where is he now? Joined West Brom in 2002, playing 107 games for them in 6 seasons, but after more bad loans than Lehman Brothers eventually found himself at Sheffield Wednesday. He only played 7 times for Wednesday and was released in May 2008. Has been without a club since then, and is currently running a clothes business in Failsworth (sounds like a retirement village for this team).
Right Wing
Terry Cooke was a small tricky winger who showed a huge amount of promise in his first couple of games – including one sublime flick and subsequent cross in the build up to a Giggs goal against Bolton – but he failed to start in his 4 further years at the club. His sunken cheekbones and dark eyes meant he bore a startling experience to a malnourished smackhead. Appropriately he signed for City after a reasonable loan spell with them, but it transpired that was but a cunning ploy from Agent Cooke to embezzle large sums of money out of them.
United appearances/seasons: 8/5.
United highlight: His one and only league start on his debut at Old Trafford in a 3-0 defeat of Bolton in the 95/96 season. A close second is his solitary United goal in his only other start for the club in a 3-1 win against York in the League Cup (an aggregate 3-4 loss following an embarrassing 3-0 defeat at Old Trafford).
Where is he now? Surprisingly enough had been busy outshining his more illustrious former digs mate playing in the MLS with the Colorado Rapids since 2005. However – let me put on my Stetson and ill-fitting Levis here – he was waived in summer 2009 by the Rapids, and after a trial with the Seattle Sounders came to nothing he missed the September 15th roster freeze date. Which I think means his contract wasn’t renewed and he has missed their transfer deadline day. After failing to win a contract following a brief trial at Nottingham Forest, he was most recently found slumming it down under with Robbie Fowler (now at Perth Glory) at North Queensland Fury.
Left Wing
Initially I thought this was a tight call. The Belgrade born Swede Bojan Djordjic joined United’s youth structure from IF Brommapojkarna as a 17 year old. Despite winning young player of the year in his first year with the club Bojan only made a paltry 2 appearances for United. And surely Keith Gillespie must be a shoe-in for this role? But no, he was only going to make the bench (which incidentally has three wingers, with another three in the starting XI - best not to give up the day job) but we found room for him elsewhere. Possibly the first name down on this team sheet, Ben Thornley was widely considered to be a star in the making, rated as highly as Ryan Giggs by some, yet more aggressive as well as two-footed. He made his first team debut during the first double winning season before fellow youth team stars such as David Beckham and Paul Scholes. Unfortunately, his career was blighted by serious injury, including one knee-shattering tackle in an April ’94 reserve game that led to a subsequent civil lawsuit against Blackburn’s Nicky Marker. I’m pissing in the wind here but because I can’t find the court case listed I’ll presume it was settled out of court.
United appearances/seasons: 14/7
United highlight: Very little to choose from here. Probably his one and only league start for United at Middlesbrough in a 2-2 draw in the 96/97 season.
Where is he now? Last seen playing with Witton Albion alongside little brother (and current United and England masseur) Rod in the Unibond Premier League. His contract expired last summer and he was released along with most of the Albion squad after the club’s relegation.