Merson rates each PL team's transfer window

GBBQ

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Here he goes again, with all the expert analysis of a packet of crisps.

Highlights include:
Giving Brighton a 'D' because he hasn't heard of the players they brought in. Makes a similar remark about Huddersfield too (why not leave the analysis to someone who knows what they are analysing).
Giving United an 'A+' despite thinking that Lindeloff and Zlatan signings won't work out.

http://www.skysports.com/football/n...ositives-for-man-city-man-utd-but-not-arsenal
 
I honestly don't think anybody takes his opinions seriously at all. He has such an incredibly limited knowledge of players outside of the top 6 teams in England it's laughable.
 
GBBQ said:
Here he goes again, with all the expert analysis of a packet of crisps.

Highlights include:
Giving Brighton a 'D' because he hasn't heard of the players they brought in. Makes a similar remark about Huddersfield too (why not leave the analysis to someone who knows what they are analysing).
Giving United an 'A+' despite thinking that Lindeloff and Zlatan signings won't work out.

http://www.skysports.com/football/n...ositives-for-man-city-man-utd-but-not-arsenal
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He obviously rates Matic and Rom.
 
'I think United got a great deal when they signed Ro-Roma-Roman Lookout'
 
Jesus christ. B's for everyone. What a waste of two minutes.
 
Haven't read the article, but although he does talk sense some of the time, he leans toward Chelsea (his boyhood club) and Arsenal - even though he is acting like an outraged long-time season ticket holder just now with his wailing criticism - and often tips Spurs and United to do badly or manages to find some negatives in their good results/performances.
 
OnlyTwoDaSilvas said:
His Brighton assessment is hilarious.

"Don't know 'em. They're shit, mate"
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What's worse is look at the names brighton have bought and what huddersfield have bought, but since one set is doing well for 3 games it is great business while other is plain rubbish, it amazes me how anyone pays him to write this drivel.
 
A far as Liverpool and United go, then I actually agree with Merson. Matic and Lukaku will be great signings, I think, and us not buying a CB is as baffling as it is worrying. If we'd gotten VVD I would've given us an A+ as well. As it stands, we've just improved areas where we were already good.
 
He gave us an A even though he doesn't rate Lindelof :wenger:.
 
I honestly got more out of a random trash article that assigned Game of Thrones characters to Premier League teams.

(in case you're wondering United were Jamie Lannister. Everton and Liverpool were Jon Snow and Daenerys :rolleyes:)
 
Sterling Archer said:
I honestly got more out of a random trash article that assigned Game of Thrones characters to Premier League teams.

(in case you're wondering United were Jamie Lannister. Everton and Liverpool were Jon Snow and Daenerys :rolleyes:)
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Didn't read the article, but sounds fun! Gave it a try:

Man Utd - Jamie Lannister (I can agree to that)
Arsenal - Prince Oberyn (Arrogant, and don't finish the fight)
Liverpool - Stannis Baratheon (The "rightfull" champions of the Prem, blinded by a false prophet)
Man City - Night King - (A blue army of the dead who everyone fear, and whom never defend themselves)
Tottenham - Tyrion Lannister (Small club, and the hipsters love 'em)
Southampton - Brienne of Tarth (Strong at heart, but never manages to protect their players from Liverpool)

I couldn't think of anyone for Chelsea. Any suggestions?
 
Merson is not convinced with a defender who was in the break out team of the ucl last year. Lindelof. :lol:
 
I lost it at the Brighton part "I look through the list of signings and I don't really know any of them" :lol:
 
These pundits are paid a lot of money to be experts and most of them can't even be arsed to watch games from other leagues or do some research on foreign players coming to the PL.
 
I like how he completely ignored Grzegorz Krychowiak at West Brom. I like to imagine they mentioned the name, and he started drooling, steam coming out of his ears.

He also seems to think that Darren Fletcher has signed for West Brom.

His Arsenal one is mental too.

MERSE SAYS: Arsenal haven't done enough in this window. They've bought a centre-forward when they already had one. They needed to buy defenders and they haven't done it. As we saw against Liverpool the other day, they just aren't good enough.

I'd have sold Alexis Sanchez all day long. I doubt they'll get in the top four and they'll lose the £50m they would have got for him when he leaves for free. I think £35m for Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain is good money, but if they're letting him go then why not let Sanchez go as well?
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Yes, why are they buying Alexandre Lacazette who scored 28 goals in 30 games in the league last season? They already have Olivier Giroud who scored 12 in 29 AND Danny Welbeck who scored 2 in 16, AAAAAAAAAAAAND they had Lucas Perez who scored 1 in 11. I mean, I just don't understand it.

I also don't understand why they haven't let clearly their best player go, the one who got the most goals and the most assists for them last season, when they're willing to let a man who made an entire 16 starts for them go? Who will play wingback badly for them now? WHO?
 
Minkaro said:
I like how he completely ignored Grzegorz Krychowiak at West Brom. I like to imagine they mentioned the name, and he started drooling, steam coming out of his ears.

He also seems to think that Darren Fletcher has signed for West Brom.

His Arsenal one is mental too.



Yes, why are they buying Alexandre Lacazette who scored 28 goals in 30 games in the league last season? They already have Olivier Giroud who scored 12 in 29 AND Danny Welbeck who scored 2 in 16, AAAAAAAAAAAAND they had Lucas Perez who scored 1 in 11. I mean, I just don't understand it.

I also don't understand why they haven't let clearly their best player go, the one who got the most goals and the most assists for them last season, when they're willing to let a man who made an entire 16 starts for them go? Who will play wingback badly for them now? WHO?
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:lol:
 
Andeva said:
Didn't read the article, but sounds fun! Gave it a try:

Man Utd - Jamie Lannister (I can agree to that)
Arsenal - Prince Oberyn (Arrogant, and don't finish the fight)
Liverpool - Stannis Baratheon (The "rightfull" champions of the Prem, blinded by a false prophet)
Man City - Night King - (A blue army of the dead who everyone fear, and whom never defend themselves)
Tottenham - Tyrion Lannister (Small club, and the hipsters love 'em)
Southampton - Brienne of Tarth (Strong at heart, but never manages to protect their players from Liverpool)

I couldn't think of anyone for Chelsea. Any suggestions?
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Your list is much more thoughtful! Here's the link:

https://www.fourfourtwo.com/feature...mier-league-club-was-a-game-thrones-character
 
The best one was him thinking it was a coup keeping Darren Fletcher at West Brom. I see its now been edited.
 
Arsenal at "C minus" is just so absolutely delusional beyond belief as to be mind boggling.

It's an F- at MOST for the gooners
 
I like how much mileage he's got out of the phrase 'have a go' in this article.
 
Pretty much agree with him. We did better than most, especially if you factor in the late bonus of getting Ibra back.
 
Paul Merson is for me one of those pundits who slots into the category of "how does this muppet still have a job?"
 
I won't even read any of his articles and if he's part of any panel when I'm watching something footie related I'll swerve past it. I have no idea why anyone pays this old soak for his opinions other than they probably feel sorry for him and think by giving him employment he'll stay off the grog and out the bookies. He's almost a parody of Ron Manager mixed with a bit of Joey Essex. Absolute clown.
 
Hullyback said:
I won't even read any of his articles and if he's part of any panel when I'm watching something footie related I'll swerve past it. I have no idea why anyone pays this old soak for his opinions other than they probably feel sorry for him and think by giving him employment he'll stay off the grog and out the bookies. He's almost a parody of Ron Manager mixed with a bit of Joey Essex. Absolute clown.
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I guess they pay him because he is always available and probably needs the money more than most.
To be fair to soccer Saturday it kind of works because they all seem to get on... individually le tiss, big time Charlie and big nose are not much better than merson but somehow all together it kinda works... certainly a lot better than the bt sport version
 
He really is the worst of the worst when it comes to punditry. You'd swear his only exposure to football is MOTD.
 
sun_tzu said:
I guess they pay him because he is always available and probably needs the money more than most.
To be fair to soccer Saturday it kind of works because they all seem to get on... individually le tiss, big time Charlie and big nose are not much better than merson but somehow all together it kinda works... certainly a lot better than the bt sport version
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Not a fan of Le Tiss either, loved him as a player but as a pundit he seems to have a chip on his shoulder all the time.

The only one I watch is the Stevie Nicol, Craig Burley one, and that's on YouTube so it's in short bursts. ESPN I think.
 
Just like his grading of the weekend's PL results, this has been thrown out of sync by his attempts to avoid handing out E's and F's

Realistically I think United and City could stake a claim for A's. Other than that, I am not sure any team should get more than a C. Most clubs have signed a couple of good players but haven't really addressed key areas.

The likes of Arsenal really ought to be sitting on E's/F's. As should Spurs really because just hanging on to players isn't enough. It shows a real lack of ambition from them imo not to wanting to kick on
 
Arsenal (F) Have completely failed to address key areas which every man and his dog knows where CB and CM. Have kept an unhappy Alexis Sanchez who will likely leave on a free. Also lost the Ox against their will due to mismanaging him, both on the pitch and off it when it comes to contract renewals.

Manchester City (A-) Have strengthened significantly at full back with two quality signings. Bernardo Silva is a player I like, however not sure he will have a major impact this year, more one for the future. Haven't seen enough of Ederson but can't be worse than Bravo and it was definitely a position that needed addressing. Losing Jadon Sancho is a blow, not necessarily to their starting XI but more so to the project that they are working on with their Academy as it doesn't look great. I believe that they also needed a CB, hence the A-

Manchester United (A) Have addressed the two burning issues by signing Matic and Lukaku. Lindelof looks like a long term project and Zlatan makes sense on a free. We arguably need a LB or a RB but I don't believe that these were major high priority right now and can wait until next summer. Griezmann would have made it a perfect window for me.

Liverpool (C+) This will be controversial because Salah is a good player and arguably so is the Ox, however I find it baffling and absolutely downright bizarre that they haven't signed a CB or a 'proper' LB (sorry Andy Robertson) It's no good keep stockpiling tricky little wingers, they have to address the core issues and for me they need 3, possibly 4 defensive signings. Keita signing next season is a good move, but a lot can happen in football in 12 months so can't really factor too much in to this season's rating, however otherwise would have been a flat C

Chelsea (C) Hit and miss for me. I do think Moratta will prove to be a great signing and this saves them from getting a D. I don't rate Bakayoko although have admittedly only seen him play 4 times. I also don't understand the Drinkwater signing when they have left Chalobah and RLC leave. Don't know anything about the RB but as soon as I saw that he hadn't managed to displace Darmian in the Italy side, let's just say I wasn't worried! Rudiger looks a little erractic but has pedigree and maybe needs time.

Spurs (F) Will also be controversial but they as a club make me despair for modern football. What is their long-term ambition beyond making money and finishing above Arsenal? Why are they not linked with Lamar's, Griezmann's, Mbappe's, Bale's etc...? They finished 2nd last year! Signing that young lad from Ajax just smacks of another signing where they have thought more about the re-sale value and getting a bargain than really improving the XI. I am sorry Spurs fans but now is your chance to really kick on, before you know it, Utd, Chelsea and City will have spent another £500m and you will be back fighting for 4th again
 
Unbelievable comments from Merson! :wenger:
 
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