Van der Beek - not a duck
Lucas - did not create Star Wars
Owen - not a kitchen appliance
Lucas - did not create Star Wars
Owen - not a kitchen appliance
Players whose names are a lie
- Thread starter horsechoker
- Start date
Adam Armstrong - anything but armstrong
From now on his name is Adam Traore. The Wolves guy is Adama Armstrong
From now on his name is Adam Traore. The Wolves guy is Adama Armstrong
Rod Fanni - does not go fishing with his fanny
Slightly off topic but who would have thought arguably two of the best ever footballers were both called Ronaldo.
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Jesus - nailed routinely
Jordan Pickford - drives Lamborghini actually.
Pascal Groß - googled him, it really isn't that bad.
Pascal Groß - googled him, it really isn't that bad.
Ronaldinho's real name is Ronaldo as well.
Lenell John-Lewis - is not a shop.
Gijsbert Bos - isn't a boss and won't get your bird.
Gijsbert Bos - isn't a boss and won't get your bird.
Ansu Fati - is actually pretty lean.
Darren Bent - is actually straight.
Andrey Arshavin - has a hairy ass
Andrey Arshavin - has a hairy ass
Oliver Skipp - is actually seasick
Ansu Fati - seems to be in decent shape.
Divock Origi - is a consecrated virgin
Ricky Van Wolfswinkel - It probably means something completely different in Dutch. But none the less, I doubt he came from a wolf's winkel.
David Goodwillie - how do we know it is, has anyone seen it?
Danny Shiitu - Is not a coprophile - well not that we know of.
Danger Fourpence - neither dangerous or had fourpence - he might have had more, but judging by his career, I doubt it.
Lars Bender - Does not bend steel in the future.
Sven Bender - Is not one.
Junior Bent - and he is - is how he was announced to the crowd. I believe he wasn't.
David Goodwillie - how do we know it is, has anyone seen it?
Danny Shiitu - Is not a coprophile - well not that we know of.
Danger Fourpence - neither dangerous or had fourpence - he might have had more, but judging by his career, I doubt it.
Lars Bender - Does not bend steel in the future.
Sven Bender - Is not one.
Junior Bent - and he is - is how he was announced to the crowd. I believe he wasn't.
Salah is not a benchod
Norman Conquest - was a footballer rather than an invasion of England almost a thousand years ago.
Danny Invincible - played for Kilmarnock and Swindon, so maybe wasn't so invincible.
Danger Fourpence - not dangerous and worth a little more than four pence.
Michael Gash .......
Danny Invincible - played for Kilmarnock and Swindon, so maybe wasn't so invincible.
Danger Fourpence - not dangerous and worth a little more than four pence.
Michael Gash .......
Mo Salah - doesn't look as tasty as his name sounds
Hayley Ladd - not a lad
Ashley is not that Young anymore.
Michael Ball is not a ball.
Andy and Ashley (amongst others) aren't veggies
Michael Ball is not a ball.
Andy and Ashley (amongst others) aren't veggies
As times continues ever onwards, Im increasingly sure he smashed us then did nothing for the rest of his career
Diogo Jota - doesn't take notes.
Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink is always courteous to HSBC
Pretty much. Just are sodding luck that our best generation in Europe ran into Kaka and fecking Messi at their prime.Ryan Shawcross - played centre back
Teddy Sheringham - notoriously selfish when it comes to sharing various cured meats.
Edit - also not a cuddly toy.
Edit - also not a cuddly toy.
Paul dickov.
This one might actually be fitting.
This one might actually be fitting.
Vicente del Bosque doesn't come from the forest.
Pedro Porro is not a joint.
Koke Resurrección is not the Holy spirit and Pepe Reina is not a queen
Pedro Porro is not a joint.
Koke Resurrección is not the Holy spirit and Pepe Reina is not a queen
Yeah, but he is Ciro Immobile, so it is actually true....
Michael Gash.
Apparently not a cnut.
Apparently not a cnut.
How do you know?
Daniel Drinkwater - doesn't always drink water
Jessie Lingard - is not a girl, if he was she'd look like Phil Jones' girlfriend/wife
Phil Younghusband - is a middle aged husband now
Jessie Lingard - is not a girl, if he was she'd look like Phil Jones' girlfriend/wife
Phil Younghusband - is a middle aged husband now
Dixie Dean didn't run a University in Alabama
3 pages and nobody has mentioned that Marvelous Nakamba isn't all that marvelous
Mark Fish- Not a Fish
Marvelous Nakamba - No. Just Standard Nakamba.(His mum is charitable...Allegedly...)
Beat me to it!
Henning Berg- Not a chicken
Alphonso Davies - is not several guys named Davy