Frenkie de Jong | The last muppeting lap

Frenkie to United?

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Superunknown said:
At Barcelona HQ, the alarms are ringing. The sirens are blaring out. Workers are tripping over themselves and clipboards are flying everywhere. A giant timer has suddenly appeared on the big screen out of nowhere and everybody is losing their fecking minds. Workers are screeching down the phone, some to their superiors, whilst others make one last call to their families.

In the corner, unbeknownst to all and hidden from the chaos, Murtough and Arnold (having never got back on the plane after all), silently enter the room and watch, lighting up another cigar. They give each other a knowing look. They walk mercilessly into the room and step over the fallen bodies, their blood mixed in with the broken bottles of Cava, as they make their way to the boardroom. A normal person would take the elevator, but these spectres take the stairs, climbing an impossible distance which seems to go on for all of eternity. Finally, they reach salvation, bursting open through the door. Frenkie is in the corner, gagged and bound, whilst Laporta stops talking into the phone that he is holding. His huge, grubby fingers tremble at the sight of these nightmarish creatures. With no hope left, he takes out his wallet and, with his slimy hands fumbling all over the place, he throws the wallet to the feet of these boardroom banshees. Murtough and Arnold step over the wallet and continue to walk towards Laporta, who panics. Their eyes are fixated on him, emotionless and without fear. His sweat and odour cover his entire Mercadona-bought suit, and he sees no option left. With one last growl, he shouts out his own name as he shatters the glass with his immense bodyweight and evaporates out of the window. Frenkie, still in the corner, closes his eyes as he knows that his ordeal has come to an end.
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:lol:

Simply beautiful.
 

Suv666

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Superunknown said:
At Barcelona HQ, the alarms are ringing. The sirens are blaring out. Workers are tripping over themselves and clipboards are flying everywhere. A giant timer has suddenly appeared on the big screen out of nowhere and everybody is losing their fecking minds. Workers are screeching down the phone, some to their superiors, whilst others make one last call to their families.

In the corner, unbeknownst to all and hidden from the chaos, Murtough and Arnold (having never got back on the plane after all), silently enter the room and watch, lighting up another cigar. They give each other a knowing look. They walk mercilessly into the room and step over the fallen bodies, their blood mixed in with the broken bottles of Cava, as they make their way to the boardroom. A normal person would take the elevator, but these spectres take the stairs, climbing an impossible distance which seems to go on for all of eternity. Finally, they reach salvation, bursting open through the door. Frenkie is in the corner, gagged and bound, whilst Laporta stops talking into the phone that he is holding. His huge, grubby fingers tremble at the sight of these nightmarish creatures. With no hope left, he takes out his wallet and, with his slimy hands fumbling all over the place, he throws the wallet to the feet of these boardroom banshees. Murtough and Arnold step over the wallet and continue to walk towards Laporta, who panics. Their eyes are fixated on him, emotionless and without fear. His sweat and odour cover his entire Mercadona-bought suit, and he sees no option left. With one last growl, he shouts out his own name as he shatters the glass with his immense bodyweight and evaporates out of the window. Frenkie, still in the corner, closes his eyes as he knows that his ordeal has come to an end.
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Well done
 

Ragnar123

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Berbaclass said:
Oh they will :drool:
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Have you already agreed on what you all really want?
Either get Frenkie and help out barca or leave him at barca and watch the financial struggle? I'm receiving many mixed signals here ;)
 

Brownie85

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Ragnar123 said:
Have you already agreed on what you all really want?
Either get Frenkie and help out barca or leave him at barca and watch the financial struggle? I'm receiving many mixed signals here ;)
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Nah couldn't care less about Brokealona. Just get de Jong here and in a United shirt. Do a Varane unveiling, on the pitch infront of a packes OT. Let him feel the love :drool:
 

Lights Out

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If you've heard all they got to say
You looked but turned away
Walkaway, walkaway
If you've said all you got to say
And now the words just slip away
Just walkaway, walkaway, walkaway
That's what they say, what they say,
what they say
You gotta walkaway
If you've played all the games they play
You played them yesterday
Walkaway, walkaway
If you've been, where they want to go
Seen all they got to show
Just walkaway, walkaway, walkaway
That's what they say, what they say,
what they say
You gotta walkaway
 

DavelinaJolie

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Redfan94 said:
Am I the only person who before this saga, had never heard of the word ‘lever’ being used in relation to finances?
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It's just a word to abstract what they are actually doing. "Selling percentages of future revenue streams for short term gain, but at a longer term loss" doesn't sound as sexy to the supporters.
 

OneReligion

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Lights Out said:
If you've heard all they got to say
You looked but turned away
Walkaway, walkaway
If you've said all you got to say
And now the words just slip away
Just walkaway, walkaway, walkaway
That's what they say, what they say,
what they say
You gotta walkaway
If you've played all the games they play
You played them yesterday
Walkaway, walkaway
If you've been, where they want to go
Seen all they got to show
Just walkaway, walkaway, walkaway
That's what they say, what they say,
what they say
You gotta walkaway
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Today?
 

glazed

Eats diamonds to beat thermodynamics
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Redcy said:
In what way? We have made a bid for a player and had it accepted, what more do you want?
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It's embarrassing because of the endless reporting that FdJ doesn't want to come and would rather go a better run club that had UCL and was based in a nice city. It may be made up by Spanish journalists or it may not be, but it still makes us look like the incels messaging the hot girl who just wants validation. Better to find someone who is into us.
 

Berbaclass

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glazed said:
It's embarrassing because of the endless reporting that FdJ doesn't want to come and would rather go a better run club that had UCL and was based in a nice city. It may be made up by Spanish journalists or it may not be, but it still makes us look like the incels messaging the hot girl who just wants validation. Better to find someone who is into us.
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Most of the endless reporting is absolutely bollocks
 

Dolf

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A few hours later: "Barcelona has activated the 14th lever, causing Cruyff to wake up from the dead. They will sell him to the highest bidder so they no longer need to sell FDJ.
 

Wolfbot

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If it's true that Barca are having to force him out, I wouldn't want him joining Utd in those circumstances.

He's a quality player but if he's not really interested in moving to Utd there's a risk we won't get the best out of him even if he's supposed to be professional.

There's bound to be another player out there who could play in a similar way and would want to come to the club. If we can't identify targets that comes down to poor scouting.
 

Redcy

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glazed said:
It's embarrassing because of the endless reporting that FdJ doesn't want to come and would rather go a better run club that had UCL and was based in a nice city. It may be made up by Spanish journalists or it may not be, but it still makes us look like the incels messaging the hot girl who just wants validation. Better to find someone who is into us.
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So the reports might be completely bollocks made up by shit tier reporters, with no quotes or direct information from anyone related to him, but FdJ definitely doesn't want us? Which is it?
 

glazed

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Berbaclass said:
Most of the endless reporting is absolutely bollocks
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I'm sure it is but it makes us look bad when trying to attract other top tier players. Not saying we should pull out but I'd be quite annoyed if we end up with McFred because we were being too picky.

Redcy said:
So the reports might be completely bollocks made up by shit tier reporters, with no quotes or direct information from anyone related to him, but FdJ definitely doesn't want us? Which is it?
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The reports are the embarrassing bit. Who knows what FdJ is up to. Playing his own game certainly.
 

Redcy

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glazed said:
I'm sure it is but it makes us look bad when trying to attract other top tier players. Not saying we should pull out but I'd be quite annoyed if we end up with McFred because we were being too picky.
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So any time we bid for a player, and someone in the press reports about that player not wanting to come to us we should immediately back out of the deal?
 
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