Birds Aren't Real

Jack-C20

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Always suspected something was up. A gang of pigeons have been taking more than their fair share of the bird seed in the garden for a while now. At first I thought all birds are equal and as long as something is eating it and it’s not being wasted then fair enough, but quite frankly they’re taking the piss. Just what does America want with my ‘premium spring mix’?
 

Solius

¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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That's what the lockdowns were for. They needed to change the batteries in the birds.
 

Rado_N

Yaaas Broncos!
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Have you ever noticed how sometimes birds just appear from nowhere.

Sorry, not birds, “birds”.
 

JPRouve

can't stop thinking about balls - NOT deflategate
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so my car is stained with made up bird shit?
No, clouds are made of yoghurts and sometimes some fall on the ground. Just lick your car, it will taste like raisins.
 

Mr Pigeon

Illiterate Flying Rat
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Of course birds are real you fecking morons.

Now batteries; there's zero evidence that batteries even work. Everyone knows that they're just filled with water and the battery cartel silence anyone who speaks out because they want to protect their massive profits.
 

Marcosdeto

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No, clouds are made of yoghurts and sometimes some fall on the ground. Just lick your car, it will taste like raisins.
be thankfull that i dont like raisins
because i convinced my wife to do it and she says it tastes like shit
bird shit

obama is not stupid, he prepared drones to shit real shit
 

Rado_N

Yaaas Broncos!
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At this stage we have to conclude that conspiracy theories are just elaborate trolling. Trying to see what’s the dumbest shit you can get large sections of society to believe in.
Hopefully at some point someone will realise that the idiots will believe literally anything and perhaps this is dangerous.
 

Marcosdeto

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Of course birds are real you fecking morons.

Now batteries; there's zero evidence that batteries even work. Everyone knows that they're just filled with water and the battery cartel silence anyone who speaks out because they want to protect their massive profits.
does it hurt when the CIA inserts the battery in your arse? or are you already used to it, and even, wait in anticipation for that moment?
 

JPRouve

can't stop thinking about balls - NOT deflategate
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be thankfull that i dont like raisins
because i convinced my wife to do it and she says it tastes like shit
bird shit


obama is not stupid, he prepared drones to shit real shit
Can you ask her how she knows that, what kind of woman have you matrimonialize?
 

The Firestarter

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does it hurt when the CIA inserts the battery in your arse? or are you already used to it, and even, wait in anticipation for that moment?
Marcos patented chicks pickup line:
"Did it hurt?"
"Did what hurt?"
"Did it hurt when the CIA inserted the battery in yer arse?"
 

Mr Pigeon

Illiterate Flying Rat
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does it hurt when the CIA inserts the battery in your arse? or are you already used to it, and even, wait in anticipation for that moment?
It wasn't too bad until some bright spark in Langley decided it was more efficient to swap out the AAs we usually get for those ones you put in cars.
 

JPRouve

can't stop thinking about balls - NOT deflategate
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It wasn't too bad until some bright spark in Langley decided it was more efficient to swap out the AAs we usually get for those ones you put in cars.
"I don't have a big arse, I'm big batteried."
 

Marcosdeto

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Marcos patented chicks pickup line:
"Did it hurt?"
"Did what hurt?"
"Did it hurt when the CIA inserted the battery in yer arse?"
as an ice braker never fails

It wasn't too bad until some bright spark in Langley decided it was more efficient to swap out the AAs we usually get for those ones you put in cars.
oh
but they are more efficient, you have to give them that
 

rcoobc

Not as crap as eferyone thinks
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If birds are real and are feelings are real can we trade our feelings for birds?
 

rimaldo

All about the essence
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if birds were made of metal they wouldn’t die in a pool of pulped guts and feathers every time they made love.