I expected something more than a bunch of fat people shuffling about with their shit flags. It started off really well, too. I thought it was going to spiral into a situation where a stolen AC-130 blasted everywhere, "tourists" ran about with automatic rifles and Gerard Butler crushed some cnuts throat whilst Morgan Freeman shouted softly with his marshmallow voice. But, no, what should have been chaos akin to the aftermath of a jalfrezi mixed with a bottle of rum turned out to be nothing more than a wet fart.