I'm new in town and not yet fully accustomed.
I walk into the local supermarket where you work as security/referee.
There's one other customer in there. Insert name here.
I approch the guy and grab him by his nuts, with both hands.
Well, technically not his nuts, it's the fabric he wears, of course.
Questions:
Will you throw me out of that supermarket, period?
Does it matter to your decision-making that I never touched his balls, just his fabric?
Also, I claim it was very soft, no harms intended, and there's video footage that showes the guy is smiling afterwards - does that influence your decision-making?