Television Clarkson's Farm

Massive Spanner

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It's great, and I'm not even a Clarkson fan. I found him almost intolerable for the last number of years but there is something endearing about him in this.
 

UnrelatedPsuedo

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Yeah, I am not watching it because last few seasons of Top Gear were scripted.
Every season of modern Top Gear followed a Script. It’s expensive to make TV. You can’t just fanny around for months on end hoping to catch lightning in a bottle. There are a team of writers that write for months before a camera is ever picked up. Why would you think that the show was unscripted?

Edit : Sorry. I feel you may have been joking. As you were.
 

lsd

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Every season of modern Top Gear followed a Script. It’s expensive to make TV. You can’t just fanny around for months on end hoping to catch lightning in a bottle. There are a team of writers that write for months before a camera is ever picked up. Why would you think that the show was unscripted?

Edit : Sorry. I feel you may have been joking. As you were.

I loved the grand tour episode where they mocked those idiots who moan about the show being scripted.

I remember Jeremy saying in 2005 when the show won an award for best unscripted entertainment show he was unable to collect as he was writing next weeks script.
 

One Night Only

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Just on the 2nd episode...

Gerald :lol: fecking hell man, I love people like that. Happy as Larry, accent thicker than mud, and not a care in the world.

Kaleb is class too.
 

Rooney in Paris

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I enjoyed this show much more than I expected to. I'm one of the few people (probably) who's never seen an episode of Top Gear but I had a negative image of Clarkson due to the stuff surrounding him, but one of my friends insisted I watch this and have to say I loved it. Clarkson comes across super well and seems genuine most of the time, and Kaleb is perfect. Lots of proper laugh out loud moments, and interesting show overall. Hope it gets renewed for another season.
 

MarylandMUFan

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4 episodes in and I really enjoy it. There are so many subtle one line quips that have me cracking up. The one about Amazon wanting diversity in the show (when he was buying the sheep) really had me laughing.

Also, it really does show how hard and how much science goes into farming.
 

girish

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@SirAF, that sucks. I do hope it gets another season. I saw something about him growing chilies, somewhere.
 

SirAF

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UnrelatedPsuedo

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I caught a few more episodes of this as my partner watched it. I honestly don’t understand how people can get past how contrived it is, and how atrocious an actor Clarkson is. It’s basically a sketch show written by someone with the writing talent to only ever summon a smirk.

It must have an audience of course. I just believe that an authentic version of the same premise would have been far funnier and more enjoyable.
 

11101

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I caught a few more episodes of this as my partner watched it. I honestly don’t understand how people can get past how contrived it is, and how atrocious an actor Clarkson is. It’s basically a sketch show written by someone with the writing talent to only ever summon a smirk.

It must have an audience of course. I just believe that an authentic version of the same premise would have been far funnier and more enjoyable.
Maybe because it's not contrived and he's not acting?

Sure there will be people behind the scenes on a farm that size and they're focusing in on only a small amount of what goes on, but they are all genuine issues that farmers do face.
 

UnrelatedPsuedo

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Maybe because it's not contrived and he's not acting?

Sure there will be people behind the scenes on a farm that size and they're focusing in on only a small amount of what goes on, but they are all genuine issues that farmers do face.
You’re joking right? You know it’s scripted, with multiple takes? That’s almost a dictionary definition of acting.

You surely don’t believe he genuinely ordered a tractor that was too big? And believe all the other dramas are not planned out in advance?

I feel like I’m telling someone Father Christmas isn’t really if so….
 

11101

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You’re joking right? You know it’s scripted, with multiple takes? That’s almost a dictionary definition of acting.

You surely don’t believe he genuinely ordered a tractor that was too big? And believe all the other dramas are not planned out in advance?

I feel like I’m telling someone Father Christmas isn’t really if so….
Some of them yes, of course. You can't fake weather and many of the other issues faced though. I have a lot of family in farming and they have had some of the same things happen to them over the years as happened to Clarkson. And if you think they'd have been allowed to mess around with the livestock for entertainment purposes...

It's filmed the same way Top Gear and The Grand Tour were. Set them up with a rough script and some props and let them loose.



I even know a real farmer who actually bankrupted himself buying a massive brand new Massey Ferguson tractor that he couldn't use on half his jobs. It happens.
 

cyberman

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You’re joking right? You know it’s scripted, with multiple takes? That’s almost a dictionary definition of acting.

You surely don’t believe he genuinely ordered a tractor that was too big? And believe all the other dramas are not planned out in advance?

I feel like I’m telling someone Father Christmas isn’t really if so….
Just because they said its too big on the show doesnt mean it was too big. It was unnecessarily expensive but being too big never ran true.
 

UnrelatedPsuedo

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Just because they said its too big on the show doesnt mean it was too big. It was unnecessarily expensive but being too big never ran true.
I’m not focusing on the ‘too big so much’. Even though it was. No farmer would use that tractor to do the farming he’s pretending to do. It’s a tv show that’s going for gags at the expense of the bumbling idiot.

The whole thing is a deliberate set up, in exactly the same way that modern Top Gear and The Grand Tour segments are. That’s no great revelation.
 

UnrelatedPsuedo

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Some of them yes, of course. You can't fake weather and many of the other issues faced though. I have a lot of family in farming and they have had some of the same things happen to them over the years as happened to Clarkson. And if you think they'd have been allowed to mess around with the livestock for entertainment purposes...

It's filmed the same way Top Gear and The Grand Tour were. Set them up with a rough script and some props and let them loose.



I even know a real farmer who actually bankrupted himself buying a massive brand new Massey Ferguson tractor that he couldn't use on half his jobs. It happens.
That’s really naive. It’s all a ruse. End to end. It’s not loosely scripted. It’s tightly scripted. Multiple takes and do-overs.

I’ve only caught a couple of episodes but it’s not even a disguised ‘trick’. I’m not saying they’d mess around with livestock. Obviously.

But the simple nonsense of installing a gate that’s too small. That’s a scene that they sit down, write the scene, script it, source a gate, shoot it multiple times on a day they’ve picked, with others installing and Clarkson being filmed to suggest he did.
 

cyberman

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I’m not focusing on the ‘too big so much’. Even though it was. No farmer would use that tractor to do the farming he’s pretending to do. It’s a tv show that’s going for gags at the expense of the bumbling idiot.

The whole thing is a deliberate set up, in exactly the same way that modern Top Gear and The Grand Tour segments are. That’s no great revelation.
He has over 1000 acres, he will get great use out of that tractor. Its stuff like that thats contrived and is used as a plot point but tractors like those are bought (not many i admit) as they are used as a massive tax write off.
Its Clarkson, he can go out and buy 80k worth of farming equipment because he's a millionaire farmer, hardly anybody will ever buy expensive equipment if they dont intend to become a contractor. Thats where the storyboard comes in but the actual farming aspect is true to life. Its why I will never keep sheep and those around me that do use them as lawnmowers for the single farm payment (the grants he applies for) and view lambs as a bonus.
 

UnrelatedPsuedo

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He has over 1000 acres, he will get great use out of that tractor. Its stuff like that thats contrived and is used as a plot point but tractors like those are bought (not many i admit) as they are used as a massive tax write off.
Its Clarkson, he can go out and buy 80k worth of farming equipment because he's a millionaire farmer, hardly anybody will ever buy expensive equipment if they dont intend to become a contractor. Thats where the storyboard comes in but the actual farming aspect is true to life. Its why I will never keep sheep and those around me that do use them as lawnmowers for the single farm payment (the grants he applies for) and view lambs as a bonus.
Im certainly not going to w4nkersplain farming to someone who lives a rural life. I’ll take the points above as fact.

But there’s a 100% certainty that the Tractor was sourced as a plot device and not a ‘Mistake’. He’s making a TV show about Jeremy Clarkson farming. Not a farming show. It’s supposed to be a madcap endeavour. Not a documentary.

Again, I’ve only watched maybe two and a half episodes. I’m not going to hate-watch more of it to grumble more. It just really surprised me that people buy-in to it’s premise and falseness.
 

Pogue Mahone

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Im certainly not going to w4nkersplain farming to someone who lives a rural life. I’ll take the points above as fact.

But there’s a 100% certainty that the Tractor was sourced as a plot device and not a ‘Mistake’. He’s making a TV show about Jeremy Clarkson farming. Not a farming show. It’s supposed to be a madcap endeavour. Not a documentary.

Again, I’ve only watched maybe two and a half episodes. I’m not going to hate-watch more of it to grumble more. It just really surprised me that people buy-in to it’s premise and falseness.
I keep saying this but if you read his Sunday Times articles you can see he really is committed to that farm and going through a lot of the ups and downs that all farmers go through. This has been the case for at least a couple of years now.

Obviously, there will be a bunch of elements crowbarred in for entertainment but the central premise is about a legitimate effort to run a farm as a profitable business (albeit mainly unsuccessfully)
 

cyberman

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Im certainly not going to w4nkersplain farming to someone who lives a rural life. I’ll take the points above as fact.

But there’s a 100% certainty that the Tractor was sourced as a plot device and not a ‘Mistake’. He’s making a TV show about Jeremy Clarkson farming. Not a farming show. It’s supposed to be a madcap endeavour. Not a documentary.

Again, I’ve only watched maybe two and a half episodes. I’m not going to hate-watch more of it to grumble more. It just really surprised me that people buy-in to it’s premise and falseness.
I 100 percent agree, that tractor was bought on purpose but ive seen tractors go up and down my road that are just as big. Nowhere near as expensive and its hard to argue against the mechanics of it (which they cant) so the storyboard had everybody say it was too big. That rang hollow to me. Plus the fact he couldn't hitch a trailer when we saw him do that, and more, in past Top Gear episodes.
 

11101

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That’s really naive. It’s all a ruse. End to end. It’s not loosely scripted. It’s tightly scripted. Multiple takes and do-overs.

I’ve only caught a couple of episodes but it’s not even a disguised ‘trick’. I’m not saying they’d mess around with livestock. Obviously.

But the simple nonsense of installing a gate that’s too small. That’s a scene that they sit down, write the scene, script it, source a gate, shoot it multiple times on a day they’ve picked, with others installing and Clarkson being filmed to suggest he did.
Like I say, a lot of it can't be scripted. Yes you can do multiple takes, but you can't do retakes of shepherding. The animals only give birth or die once. The crops really are destroyed by pests and weather. It genuinely is a skill to drive a tractor and trailer alongside a combine harvester.

You can make it all into a watchable TV show but the basic premise of that show is real.
 

Rooney in Paris

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I mostly liked when they scripted the rain and then the drought and the lamb births. Great writing.

Also @UnrelatedPsuedo you're aware that pretty much every show (even though those that present themselves as "reality TV") is scripted?
 
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2 man midfield

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You can usually tell a mile off when parts are scripted. Watch the Grand Tour, some parts of that are so clearly planned it’s cringeworthy. I never got that from this, which is part of the reason I liked it so much.
 

AltiUn

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You can usually tell a mile off when parts are scripted. Watch the Grand Tour, some parts of that are so clearly planned it’s cringeworthy. I never got that from this, which is part of the reason I liked it so much.
Me too, there’s probably quite a bit scripted but I’ve not really been able to tell when those moments happen. Feels a lot more like the classic top gear specials in that regard.
 

Massive Spanner

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It was obviously scripted at a high level. I'm sure they thought setting up a shop would be a great theme for an episode, same as getting sheep, sending Caleb to London etc. I think the difference is that a lot of the conversations and chats didn't seem remotely as scripted or forced as more recent Top Gear and Grand Tour stuff.
 

TwoSheds

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I caught a few more episodes of this as my partner watched it. I honestly don’t understand how people can get past how contrived it is, and how atrocious an actor Clarkson is. It’s basically a sketch show written by someone with the writing talent to only ever summon a smirk.

It must have an audience of course. I just believe that an authentic version of the same premise would have been far funnier and more enjoyable.
Yeah that's my mate you're talking about there who supposedly scripted it so don't be a cnut eh? I can tell you she's got ADHD and definitely wouldn't have had the patience for millions of movie-style takes (nor would Clarkson I'm sure), but yes obviously she had to find ways to get interesting things to happen on camera. In fact most of her time was spent in the pub trying to get Gerald to turn up for spurious reasons to pass comment on things or "help out". But that's not a script.

I echo the sentiments of the vast majority of people in this thread - don't like Clarkson but the show is great and for once he's largely not being a prick.