football jokes

BennyF

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Liverpool FC and the part-time, glory-hunting, granny robbing, plastic loving supporters
 

$ukhjit

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Joined
May 4, 2001
Messages
5,326
Location
Leicester, United Kingdom
David Beckham has gone crazy believing his wife Posh has been having an affair on him. In his rage, he goes out and buys a gun. He rushes home to confront his wife, and finds her in bed with none other than Roy Keene. Devistated, Beckham takes out the gun and points it at his own head. "No, David don't do it." Posh cries jumping up from her spot underneathe the covers. "I'm sorry and I know we can work this out."
"Shut up and sit back." Beckham replies. "You're next."
 

barca99

Guest
Originally posted by TIMEX:
<strong>if you have a football joke send it here</strong><hr></blockquote>

Your 'Are Leicester better than Manchester' thread, that was the funniest joke I've heard for ages <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" />
 

barca99

Guest
Originally posted by TIMEX:
<strong>who the hell moved this topic</strong><hr></blockquote>

I'm guessing it was one of the moderators? <img src="confused.gif" border="0">
 

Beckham007

Full Member
Joined
Apr 19, 2000
Messages
4,473
Location
Sir Matt Busby Way - LUHG
Originally posted by $ukhjit:
<strong>Knock knock
Who's there?
Derby
Derby who?
Exactly!</strong><hr></blockquote>

<img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" /> <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" /> <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" /> <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" /> <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" /> <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" />
 

barca99

Guest
Originally posted by TIMEX:
<strong>this was supposed to be jokes about Man Utd</strong><hr></blockquote>

I don't know any Chelsea jokes, sorry pal <img src="confused.gif" border="0">
 

nowthenau

Guest
On her first day at a new job as a teacher of primary school kids in North London, the new teacher attempts to get to know her pupils by announcing that she is a Spurs fan. She asks those in the class who are also Spurs fans to raise their hands. The whole class does so, with the exception of one little lad. The teacher asks the little lad which team he supports.
"Arsenal" came the reply.
"Why Arsenal?" asks the teacher.
"Well" he continues, "Me Dad supports Arsenal. me Uncle supports Arsenal, and me grandad supports Arsenal" stated the young man.
"Oh dear" said the teacher, "It's not always good to follow everything your family does you know. Sometimes you should make your own decisions. I mean what if your Dad was a thief and your Mother was a whore?"
"Then" answered the lad " I'd be a Liverpool fan!"
Stay <img src="graemlins/lol.gif" border="0" alt="[Laugh Out Loud]" /> wontcha
 

Murt

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Newbie
Joined
Sep 29, 2001
Messages
16,988
Location
Dimmer than Welsh Red
Originally posted by $ukhjit:
<strong>Knock knock
Who's there?
Derby
Derby who?
Exactly!</strong><hr></blockquote>


theres not many who would find this funny but as i suspected there was one
:rolleyes: