I hate commentators so much

Gazza

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Useless useless useless

They're paid for their services and yet theres not one i can actually stand

Utterly useless
 
They're tolerable

Tyler is a cock but at least he knows how to commentate, and Andy gray is ok

The rest need shooting (or at least need to get some talent)
 
Andy Gray is alright the rest just spout boring cliches and statistics and speak utter shite.
 
Paddy Crerand is the best, especially when Keano breaks someone's leg or something, and he starts shouting "Ref! Ref! That was never a foul!".

Class.
 
The worst cnut by a mile is Jonathon "OH feck DID YOU SEE THAT ITS A feckING GREAT GOAL IN FACT THE BEST EVER BUT ITS ACTUALLY ONLY A CORNER "Pearce.

Utter utter COCK.
 
Plechazunga said:
They're all so stupid and witless

It's amazing they can play the game for 20 years, then commentate for another 20, and yet know sod all about the game and less about broadcasting.
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You like Peter Drury who is one of the worst. Him and John Champion. Sound like posh twats who make the game sound like some sort of never-ending story. And Drury is the king of the run-on sentence... "and that's a great pass, and here's Veron, and there's van Nistelrooy, and there is a very, very, very good goal..."

There are two kinds, the ones i just described such as Champion, Drury and Tyldesley, who think they're fecking clever (I despise Tyldeley's little puns that he spent days preparing, although as a Manc he is forgiven somewhat) and morons who just recite what is happening to don't shut their mouths for one second (I don't need to be told if someone has hit the crossbar, i can see it with my own bloody eyes!)

And the pundits are a joke - how many times is Robbie Earle gonna use the phrase 'pace and power' and think this mild alliteration is unique. And David Pleat and Trevor Francis, the monotoned muffins, you know their children must hate them. Too many of them just recite what we can see with our own eyes - "Kanoute... just gets the ball... works it onto his right foot.. and its juuuust pushed round the post. Good effort."

feck OFF PLEASE (you can see i've given this subject a lot of thought, but they contribute NOTHING to the game or to life in general)
 
Grays the best co-commentator/pundit around, probably the only one I like. Tyler however is an absolute cnut, a Gooner loving monstrosity who should be severed into little pieces and cooked on a kebab stick over a Barbeque.

I miss Ron Atkinson, by far the greatest Football co-commentator in the History of the game, he and Tysledly were a great duo, now after being ravaged by the PC brigade hes been replaced by Andy nice but dimm Townsend. Bring back Orange Ron...www.dangerhere.com/ronglish
 
Don't try and deny it Plech

mcinnerny-percy.jpg


Lord Drury
 
In fact Brackley did himself irrepairable damage last season when he followed the replay of an offside decision by telling me in his condescending manner "He was onside, you know"

Plus it takes him 20 seconds to catch up with what everyone else has already figured out
 
Its the "you know" at the end, as if we can't see for ourselves, as if he's the wise old sage who is educating us. He's also a member of the monotone club - his voice has not changed in the 500 years he's been commentating.

He's better than shriekers and squeakers who never shut up, but he's certainly fallen since his days doing the Serie A matches for C4.

Arguably the worst is the fella who did (does?) the commentary on dreamteam, and he is the same in real life - awful voice, awful cliches and all-round annoyance. Commentators oh my god, so painful.
 
The worst commentator is the one who does commentary for United youth/academy games on MUTV, not reserve games (Bower and Crerand are good, incidently) although I think its the same fella who does the 'team news' for the reserves, dont know his name, but christ hes awful.

Motsons a senile creep and I thought Davies was a miserable bastard aswell. Starting to agree with your sentiments here Gazza!
 
Its a well known fact that Motson and Davies are on drugs and have been for quite some time - acid is Motty's drug of choice whereas Davies likes a relaxing toke before matches
 
VanNistelrater said:
The worst commentator is the one who does commentary for United youth/academy games on MUTV, not reserve games (Bower and Crerand are good, incidently) although I think its the same fella who does the 'team news' for the reserves, dont know his name, but christ hes awful.
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That guy is absolutely unbelieveable!

A promising...........break..........by Frazer Campbell.........looked destined............for glory..........but unfortunately.........the woodwork...........intervened.........to deny...............the Reds............an early opening

Literally every phrase is a cliche, he makes terribly embarrassing grammatical errors, and he sounds like a retarded adenoidal robot. Apart from that, he's top class.

By the way I despised Bryan Moore too.
 
By far the worst at Lawrenson and Pleat. Utterly terrible.

One of the best I heard was actually Stan Collymore when he was on 5-Live. Very good - a good speaker who had interesting things to say and summerised well.

Unfortunately he got sacked for dogging.
 
Over here, we can get George Hamilton and JohnGiles, that's the dream team and the best you can get IMO.....Eamon Dunphy in the studio along with maybe Liam Brady/Ray Houghton/Jim Beglin or someone like that.
 
MPTutd said:
By far the worst at Lawrenson and Pleat. Utterly terrible.

One of the best I heard was actually Stan Collymore when he was on 5-Live. Very good - a good speaker who had interesting things to say and summerised well.

Unfortunately he got sacked for dogging.
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Pleat is one of the most retarded feckers ever to appear on TV.
 
I like martin tyler and andy gray. They make a good combination and their voices are just right. Expect when arsenal play and tyler gets a hard on everytime henry does anything.

The only problem is theyr too biased towards english players.

Otherwise i like this chap who commentates alot in the champions league in big games. I forgot his name, his face doesnt suit his voice at all, fat and balding chap. Hes pretty good.
 
Alan Parry is dreadful - can't read the game at all. The amount of times you see him describing a pass as great just because of the player who passed it and the length of the pass, is unbelievable. Alonso could pass it to a guy standing out in the car park, and as soon as the ball left his foot, Parry would be saying 'Oh, that's another beautiful pass by Alonso..." and then cover his arse by saying "...just too long this time". Just? It was in the car park you moron.
 
Tyler's alright. But he so obviously fancies Andy Gray. It's embarrassing. I reckon they get together with hairy hands and have a right old clusterfeck after each match.
 
VanNistelrater said:
The worst commentator is the one who does commentary for United youth/academy games on MUTV, not reserve games (Bower and Crerand are good, incidently) although I think its the same fella who does the 'team news' for the reserves, dont know his name, but christ hes awful.

Motsons a senile creep and I thought Davies was a miserable bastard aswell. Starting to agree with your sentiments here Gazza!
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Oh yeah Joe Evans.
 
Andy Gray is surely the best co-commentator. As for commentators the worst on English stations for me is Alan Parry. Although over in Ireland there are a couple, Trevor Welch and George Hamilton who are nearly worse.
 
Yeah I like the default Champions League Commentator. The best imo. Does anyone know his name? And why he's not assigned to any English League matches? Gets things spot on and knows how to make matches sound better than they are. Doesn't anyone else know him? Maybe it's because I watch Champions League football on Terrestrial TV.
 
Most of them are rubbish, and to me that Steve Claridge is the biggest plonker of all time. No wonder Millwall only kept Him as manager for 10 minutes. But I suppose if we were all abroad on holiday and wanted to see a match we would moan if there was some foreigner commentating.
 
Worst I've heard last season and so far this though, from England, are Gary Birtles and David Pleat.

Robbie Earle and Paul Walsh are OK imo.

Try watching footy in the States while listening to Bretos, Miles & Hudson.... Excruciating to say the least.
 
sincher said:
Alan Parry is dreadful - can't read the game at all. The amount of times you see him describing a pass as great just because of the player who passed it and the length of the pass, is unbelievable. Alonso could pass it to a guy standing out in the car park, and as soon as the ball left his foot, Parry would be saying 'Oh, that's another beautiful pass by Alonso..." and then cover his arse by saying "...just too long this time". Just? It was in the car park you moron.
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Yeah you're right about Parry. Mind you it would be no surprise him going overboard about Alonso seen as hes a big fan of the dippers.
 
Pleat was doing my head in during Euro 2004

he allways called Vieira - Vieri and Vieri - Vieira, he cant say anyones name right


Lawro is allways tryin to make funny jokes allthough in the Eng v Spain match he did say one which was after Reyes got taken out again by Gaz he went "That Reyes has had more hits than the beattles"
 
i think motson is by far the worst of the lot simply because everyone kisses his arse so much even though he's completely senile and he's only there for sentimental value, he's a completely talentless prick. he tells you what he thinks has happened 5 minutes after something, and most likely the exact opposite has happened. the worst thing is him getting excited as soon as the ball crosses the half way line, as if somebody has scored the goal of the century, probably shitting his incontinence pants in the process.
 
garth crooks as well, what a cock. he emphasises everything he says as if its going to be some kind of life changing insight, when its just another inane comment that anyone without a clue could pull out of their arse.

alan parry is only there to keep the scouse happy on the radio. they have motd well covered already.
 
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