If Caf posters were LOTR characters....

[Livvie]

...Gillespie, Jopub and all Gooners, would be orcs.

Sauron - one of the Liverpool contingent. I'm saying nothing......

Saruman - Softie. Bless him.

Aragorn would have to be offered to Niall, him being the boss like. But othere candidates may apply.

Van.Nist for one of the Hobbits.

Sam Gangee - Weaste

Legolas - who's the best looking bloke on here?

Gandalf - has to be Plech. Oh wise one.....

Eowyn - RoD. Feisty but feminine.

Faramir - would have to be Nate then.

 

[Nate]

Van = Gollum

 

[Mickeyredlad]

...Gillespie, Jopub and all Gooners, would be orcs.

Eowyn - RoD. Feisty but feminine.

But Eowyn has sex appeal.

 

[Dragon_Merah]

Devilish = Wormtongue

 

[Livvie]

But Eowyn has sex appeal.

Go and hijack someone else's thread if you want a row.



Does someone have to get personal in every topic?

 

[Davo]

...Gillespie, Jopub and all Gooners, would be orcs.

Sauron - one of the Liverpool contingent. I'm saying nothing......

Saruman - Softie. Bless him.

Aragorn would have to be offered to Niall, him being the boss like. But othere candidates may apply.

Van.Nist for one of the Hobbits.

Sam Gangee - Weaste

Legolas - who's the best looking bloke on here?

Gandalf - has to be Plech. Oh wise one.....

Eowyn - RoD. Feisty but feminine.

Faramir - would have to be Nate then.

I like Sauron, but feel its harsh to suggest that Melborne Red would be him

Pletch would actually be Tom Bombadil...the wordy nonsense speaker

You'd be Shelob, that big feck off spider...

 

[Honest John]

Legolas - who's the best looking bloke on here?


sigh. I guess thats me then

 

[Livvie]

I like Sauron, but feel its harsh to suggest that Melborne Red would be him

Pletch would actually be Tom Bombadil...the wordy nonsense speaker

You'd be Shelob, that big feck off spider...

Now you're just assuming that I meant you for Sauron aren't you.......

And yes, I am recasting Plech even as we speak.

 

[spinoza]

Who's Arwen?

 

[Davo]

As far as I know Spin there are no poofs in LOTR...so you'll have to be Gollum, no the basis that he eats anything..

 

[Livvie]

Who's Arwen?

Whos got big ears?

(Cue old joke.....)

 

[Nate]

But Eowyn has sex appeal.

Just a tip mate its only a forum.

 

[Nate]

Legolas - who's the best looking bloke on here?


sigh. I guess thats me then

Too old.

 

[Livvie]

Gandalf is still up for grabs, due to some inspired recasting by my assistant.

 

[Honest John]

Too old.

Cheeky cnut. I age well mate. Peter Pan me!

 

[Livvie]

Cheeky cnut. I age well mate. Peter Pan me!

Well if you're already in panto there's no point in you auditioning here is there.

 

[Davo]

I'd make a good Gandalf...based on the fact that I'm powerful, wise and good personified..

Failing that....someone like Marching or Ed, as they're old cnuts

 

[Livvie]

I'd make a good Gandalf...based on the fact that I'm powerful, wise and good personified..

Failing that....someone like Marching or Ed, as they're old cnuts

I've got Ed lined up for Bilbo.

 

[Honest John]

Well if you're already in panto there's no point in you auditioning here is there.

Guess you're right Liv. Fancy being my Wendy?

:xmas:

 

[Plechazunga]

kin nerds

actually i'm just bitter at losing the Gandalf role...fair enough though tbh, i wouldn't really list wisdom as one of my qualities...in fact in my quarter of a century or so on this planet, I can't really say I've learned a single useful fecking life lesson. Unless you count 'don't try to firewalk with 6 pints down you and no formal instruction'.

I'd say the wisest are Bury, Wibbs and her Livness.

 

[Linaw50]

I'm a bit like Merry, but 100% more feminine.

 

[spinoza]

As far as I know Spin there are no poofs in LOTR...so you'll have to be Gollum, no the basis that he eats anything..

And that's where you're wrong... he eats fish. Mostly fish. Certainly not stewed rabbit.

I'm probably King Dain II Ironfoot, a character that doesn't feature in the movies... yet... As I'm a friend to all and an implacable enemy of evil (Liverpool in real life).

 

[WeasteDevil]

Sam Gangee - Weaste.

Am I not just a tad too tall for this role? I mean, what do you expect me to do, play him on my knees?

 

[Davo]

And that's where you're wrong... he eats fish. Mostly fish. Certainly not stewed rabbit.

I'm probably King Dain II Ironfoot, a character that doesn't feature in the movies... yet... As I'm a friend to all and an implacable enemy of evil (Liverpool in real life).

Yeah but he'd eat anything...the dirty little fecker..

You're Gollum....him or Julian Clary

Your choice...

 

[spinoza]

Yeah but he'd eat anything...the dirty little fecker..

You're Gollum....him or Julian Clary

Your choice...

Feck off Davo. Gollum doesn't eat anything. I see you're imitating devilish in this thread...

Dain Ironfoot, as I said.

 

[Davo]

Feck off Davo. Gollum doesn't eat anything. I see you're imitating devilish in this thread...

Dain Ironfoot, as I said.

You always have to cause trouble don't you? Every feckin time you play the drama queen...you poofs are like that

Gollum eats fish as that was his main food supply in the caves...he also ate orcs when he could catch them, and raw rabbits....as you probably would if offered.

Hence you're quite clearly Gollum

 

[Kristjan]

The Witch King of Angmar/Lord of the Nazgûl

that'd be me then, being the evil person that I am

 

[Plechazunga]

You really are a load of feckin sad cnuts

 

[Davo]

You really are a load of feckin sad cnuts

Says the most annoying cnut in LOTR...

If I could change the book in one way it would be that cnut suffering a painful death

 

[Plechazunga]

See what I mean - here's some cnut fantasising about what he'd do if given the power to change a fantasy novel.

Gimp.

 

[Davo]

See what I mean - here's some cnut fantasising about what he'd do if given the power to change a fantasy novel.

Gimp.

You can moan all you 'kin like...you're not Gandalf and that's that..

You're that annoying cnut that everyone hates...and was left out of the films

and you're a shit driver

 

[Plechazunga]

You can moan all you 'kin like...you're not Gandalf and that's that..

In your fantasy world (about a fantasy world)

You're that annoying cnut that everyone hates

Yes...

...and was left out of the films

...no...that's a fantasy, remember?

and you're a shit driver

Now that is a depressing reality

 

[Davo]

RZ99 can be whatserface in the elven forest...but with a bikini

26 can be the barman

and just to recap..Spin is Gollum and Pletch is that cnut that everyone hates.

 

[WeasteDevil]

and you're a shit driver

 

[spinoza]

You always have to cause trouble don't you? Every feckin time you play the drama queen...you poofs are like that

Gollum eats fish as that was his main food supply in the caves...he also ate orcs when he could catch them, and raw rabbits....as you probably would if offered.

Hence you're quite clearly Gollum

And you've conveniently neglected to mention that he turned down stewed rabbit, which I wouldn't, and lembas, which I wouldn't either...

In fact Gollum is a right fussy cnut when it comes to food, so is not unlike you... Add in the fact that he's a snivelling nasty little annoyance, and the resemblance to you becomes even clearer...

I see where you're going with this Davo, and it won't work... all this talk about Gollum being someone else is just a smoke screen. He's the epitome of you.

 

[Plechazunga]

I have the fire-sword of Agnor and an imp army forged in the halls of Grothlock, the eternal Rune of Codswallop will be mine and I shall free the imprisoned pixies of Flatworld, which gives me 5 extra lives so there!

 

[Davo]

And you've conveniently neglected to mention that he turned down stewed rabbit, which I wouldn't, and lembas, which I wouldn't either...

In fact Gollum is a right fussy cnut when it comes to food, so is not unlike you... Add in the fact that he's a snivelling nasty little annoyance, and the resemblance to you becomes even clearer...

I see where you're going with this Davo, and it won't work... all this talk about Gollum being someone else is just a smoke screen. He's the epitome of you.

Gollum eats weird food...simple as that, and therefore matches you more than anyone else..

and he's a 'kin whingy tw@ an all...

Further evidence..

and Pletch is still that cnut that everyone hates

 

[An Extremely Boring Man]

Wouldn't have a clue, fell asleep during both - crap films!

 

[Plechazunga]

Oh no!!! The Nargorth Riders approach on the cloaked steeds of Gridlock!
They shall kidnap Dildo Catflap and put black doomtorches up his eternal ring! What a bugger!

 

[Davo]

I have the fire-sword of Agnor and an imp army forged in the halls of Grothlock, the eternal Rune of Codswallop will be mine and I shall free the imprisoned pixies of Flatworld, which gives me 5 extra lives so there!

said Tom Bombadil...

Whilst wishing he was Gandalf