I thought it was a piss take at first. Love the translated parts 
Michael Owen produces brochure of himself to find a new club
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Nik (@Rood) and Imran (@Annihilate Now!) discuss United's fantastic win away against Athletic Club in the semi-final of the Europa League.
They also pick out the positives of United's 4-3 loss away at Brentford, and Nik reviews a day out at Old Trafford watching Manchester United Women qualify for the Champions League.
Its written as if its aimed at aspiring teens, rather than proffessional football clubs...
"one of the most feared goalscorers in the world"
"powerful physique"
Had to stop reading at the brand values page, this is just ridiculous.
"powerful physique"
Had to stop reading at the brand values page, this is just ridiculous.
Very cringy
"2nd best know English player in the world" I highly doubht that and if he is, it's for being an injury prone money grabber
"2nd best know English player in the world" I highly doubht that and if he is, it's for being an injury prone money grabber
Oh dear
"Clean & Fresh"!It really takes a lot of arrogance to do such a thing, I used to have a little respect for Owen as he always seemed decent but this is cringeworthy.Amazing how a footballer resorts to such things as promoting himself in this manner.
Arrogant dickhead
Arrogant dickhead
I'm now convinced.
bit harsh that... it's just like a snazzy resume/portfolio or similar, he is after a job ...
Stopped reading at the first one. Fit & Healthy my arseOh dear
Take the "brand values" page, what is the point of that ? A lot of footballers look to move from clubs to others but I don't see them doing brochures and write hypothetic human qualities they have.I fail to see the relevance, he could have gone public and openly said 'I want a new club' then it'd have made more sense
wow. I now believe SAF must sign him. He will be the next best player of the world. His is our 42 goals per season replacement!
Probably, the PL has been the best in the world in the last few years where Gerrard and Rooney have been two highlighted English players.
With the United getting to 2 European finals in the last 2 years Rooney has had more worldwide exposure and Gerrard has been in the final stages.
I think if you asked people around the world they would know Rooney and maybe Gerrard ahead of Owen
Sign him up Roman!
Seriously though, would this sort of thing really influence ANY manager/club out there?
Also, Charismatic? I lol'd.
Seriously though, would this sort of thing really influence ANY manager/club out there?
Also, Charismatic? I lol'd.
Had he given a link to his wikipedia page and YouTube clips it would've been a lesser embarassment.
Although being a very limited striker he can get goals if there is good supply line.£35 K per week in a one year roll over contract he's worth having a look at for any top club.
Although being a very limited striker he can get goals if there is good supply line.£35 K per week in a one year roll over contract he's worth having a look at for any top club.
Sign him up!
Yet for England he was much better than Gerrard and Rooney put together. May be it was because of Sven's long ball game with a nine men defence but he has always delivered for England when it really matterred.
On a free and if he accepted a cut in wages I'd take him at United.
If he can play at least 20-30 games (not starting) a season then he would easily get double figures here.
If he can play at least 20-30 games (not starting) a season then he would easily get double figures here.
Owen was the second famous English footballer when Beckham was número uno, Sven was managing the side and the england team became popular for all wrong reasons inspite of being rubbish.
the medical review. Questionable advice rather than individual susceptibility to injury.
Far too many qualities for a single human soul, the guy is a saint
I feel a bit sorry for him, he's a nice bloke from what I know of him. Would be a good signing for a range of premier league clubs if he can stay fit. Saha + Owen wouldn't be bad.
Regardless of teh brochure i think he could do a job at united as third choice striker for free
i would also happily take him on a pay-as-you-play
would be a great addition to the squad now that Tevez has definitely gone.
would be a great addition to the squad now that Tevez has definitely gone.
Great read.
Fit & Healthy?
Should read... Fit & Healthy (At the time of printing)
This is a time when teams at the highest level do not use Football Manager or brochures to choose players (unless you're Peter Kenyon). You can bet that Martin O'Neill, David Moyes, Harry Redknapp and others will not be considering Owen on the basis of a brochure (no matter how nice it looks). They will have sent scouts to watch him on the pitch and they will have watched videos of him later. They would have used their contacts to perhaps talk with the likes of Keegan on what they thought about Owen. But they would not have looked at idiocy like something that is so obviously P.R. bollocks.
He has started 45 league games in two seasons and scored 20 league goals in that time.
Surely their is a club that is going to take him on considering his ability.
Surely their is a club that is going to take him on considering his ability.
He is cool
Thats basically a poorly made Powerpoint presentation
Thats basically a poorly made Powerpoint presentation
Fit and healthy
This is just pure comedy.Putting aside the cringeworthy bullshit, I'd love to know how they concluded that a 29 year old injury prone striker is 'young'.
brillinat.The medical review part is gold. "in my opinion he will play at the top level for years to come - " trouble free!"
Be interested to know what the Trades Description Act makes of the Medical review section. It reads as little more than blame shifting bullshit.
fecking hell that's embarrasingSeriously, this management company have made themselves look a laughing stock. This just isn't how you do it, even I know that!
surely this is a joke? where did someone get this from?
its been in all the papers - it is totally legit apparently
michael owen - the rise and the fall
I'm still confused by the 'Clean and Fresh' bit. What is that even supposed to mean?
It's the type of thing you'd see on a prostitutes business card.
It's the type of thing you'd see on a prostitutes business card.
fecking "Fit & Healthy"????
Who the hell is he kidding? Even if he is (finally) fit, there's no way in hell that you could say Michael Owen embodies or encapsulates the essence of Fit & Healthy
I like the successful bit, he's never won anything with his country, never won the league, in fact the last thing he won was the league cup in 2003.
Newcastle United fans will disagree with just about every single thing on that list, too!