Twentysixther Thread

[Plechazunga]

Ponytailed Plech started to retch
He missed the bucket that he had started to fetch
He managed to chunder on Golden Blunder
Face like thunder ... What rhymes with Tundra?
Ponytailed Plech

I actually didn't bother to read it Wibbs, 'cos i misread your name as "Wobbly", and I don't read his comments about my ponytail, which by the way I don't and have never had...

Good poem...please don't ban me...except all days except matchdays

Su'agoaws

 

[Wibble]

Spam master Plech started to retch
He missed the bucket that he had started to fetch
He allegedly chundered on Golden Blunder
Face like thunder ... What rhymes with Tundra?
Spam master Plech


Is this better?

 

[Wibble]

Two poems in the same day.

Maybe I wasn't the "talentless twat" my English lit teacher thought I was. Although to be fair to him we did always wind him up by trying to get him to explain poems and then when he did we would pick holes in the similies and ask him why the writer didn't just say whay he meant instead of fannying around trying to confuse people.

 

[Slabber]

and then when his did pick holes in the similies

do you mean he picked holes on you smilies?

 

[Slabber]

and then when he did we would pick holes in the similies

spoil-sport

 

[Wibble]

No we didn't have smilies or computers when I was at school.

We did have a few teachers who were interetsted in making themselves smile by fiddling with boys holes though.

 

[Wibble]

spoil-sport

I know. We were so mean.

Living on the edge. Word dawg.

 

[Slabber]

I think maybe the reason some Caf members did so poorly in this year's papers was because they put smilies at the end of every sentence. And in English, when they were asked to give an example of a similie, they put .

 

[Wibble]

:couldbesmiliey:

Either that or they used txt spk.

 

[sincher]

Yeah. Anyway.

Giggsy's Girl, give the caf a twirl.
What's that round your neck? A necklace made of pearl?
It looks like there's a hint of Mr. Andrew Flintoff
In your dream, Freddie's cream,
Giggsy's Girl.

 

[spinoza]

 

[GiggsysGirl]

Yeah. Anyway.

Giggsy's Girl, give the caf a twirl.
What's that round your neck? A necklace made of pearl?
It looks like there's a hint of Mr. Andrew Flintoff
In your dream, Freddie's cream,
Giggsy's Girl.

 

[Davo]

Frank Lampard's, neither big nor hard
He says "Su'agoaws" like a fat retard
Doesn't suffer from fatigue, his Russian bought the league
Plastic fans, Spastic plans
Gaytard

 

[redcharlie]

Not sure you should be celebrating that so readily, young lady.

In any case, the one under your last answer is the best of the lot

 

[Melbourne Red]

'FREDDIE FLINTOFF! FREDDIE FLINTOFF! FREDDIE FLINTOFF!'
'My name's Kevin fecking Pietersen you dozy bint...'

 

[GiggsysGirl]

'FREDDIE FLINTOFF! FREDDIE FLINTOFF! FREDDIE FLINTOFF!'
'My name's Kevin fecking Pietersen you dozy bint...'

it's sad cause it's true!

i heard a rumour the aussie fans may be shouting, "KEVIN PIETERSEN! KEVIN PIETERSEN! KEVIN PIETERSEN!" from the Oval stands next week

 

[Melbourne Red]

I'm enjoying the fact that you're convinced it's true based on that excerpt

Do you know someone who shagged him then?

Assuming it wasn't you in it.

 

[GiggsysGirl]

I'm enjoying the fact that you're convinced it's true based on that excerpt

Do you know someone who shagged him then?

Assuming it wasn't you in it.

no, i heard some 23 year old called Gemma sold her story to one of the tabloids!

i believe everything i read/hear...i'm like that!

 

[GiggsysGirl]

here's another excerpt...

This is the guy who, after a hiring a car, plastered a huge home-made slogan down one side, which read: 'Kevin Pietersen - Nottinghamshire Professional Cricketer.'
That's class for you!

 

[Melbourne Red]

What site's that off then?

By all accounts he's a haard taaskmaaster

 

[GiggsysGirl]

'twas the Sunday Mirror, apparently...

http://www.sundaymirror.co.uk/search.cfm?searchscope=106694&query=kevin+pietersen&num=10

 

[Ronaldo07]

I'll give this a try

Handy Bandy goes by the name of Mandy
Ask him how he is and he'll tell you he's randy
In his Ronaldo shirt he'll tell you crossdressing doesnt hurt
bald spot, moose snot
Handy bandy

Its kinda shit dont you think.... Oh well first time

 

[Plechazunga]

Caf Irishmen, are crying again
Drying their eyes and buying ten
Guinnesses with chasers, we should finish them with Tazars
Sing-song, it's just wrong...
Caf Irish

 

[Plechazunga]

Parking fines are a farking crime
Must be out of their barking minds
Residential permit, make everyone a hermit
Blown a grand...broke my hand...
cnuts

 

[sincher]

That cnut sweeeet, is a massive cheat
Beat us all at pool, but prefers to beat his meat,
Cheated in the final, with his style vaginal,
On heat, complete
Cnut sweeeet

 

[MalibuKen]

Can You See? Oh Its Me!
I ran you all up the pool tree!
I Clealy Won, Played Just For Fun
Noodle moans, Sincher groans
maybe they are just dumb!

 

[TheDevil'sOwn]

dervish2, hasn't got a clue
Creams "herself" over Sheffield U
Aliens emerging, sheep shag aversion
Wind-Up-ette, Newb Muppet
dervish II

 

[sincher]

Excellent.

 

[TheDevil'sOwn]

Excellent.

My muse was calling.

 

[Bury Red]

Dervish2, what are we to do?
Wibbs got drunk and promoted you
Now we're stuck and your postings suck
Alien posts and ghosts
Dervish2

 

[ellie brown]

Well there's GB, still need Gillespie, CR7fan and Ellie before I'll consider it for the classics.

I'll start you off

Ellie Brown never lets us down
The caffs brighter when she is around
Sprogged last year, sleepless nights we hear
Baby Kiwi
Ma Brown

 

[ellie brown]

what about haikus or limericks?

 

[Suresh]

Dervish2, what are we to do?
Wibbs got drunk and promoted you
Now we're stuck and your postings suck
Alien posts and ghosts
Dervish2

Bravo! You obviously missed your calling.

 

[k-standred]

That's pretty good BR

 

[sincher]

Dervish2, what are we to do?
Wibbs got drunk and promoted you
Now we're stuck and your postings suck
Alien posts and ghosts
Dervish2

Top drawer 26th-ing.

 

[Wibble]

We now need one involving GB hairy ban stick

 

[Big Andy]

We now need one involving GB hairy ban stick

Dervish2, your posts are poo,
GB's hairy ban stick's waiting for you,
Wibble cracks a smile, dervish posts about x-files,
Hates Heinze, and crop signs
Dervish2

 

[k-standred]

Dervish2, your posts are poo,
GB's hairy ban stick's waiting for you,
Wibble cracks a smile, dervish posts about x-files,
Hates Heinze, and crop signs
Dervish2

 

[Plechazunga]

Golden Prague, doesn´t rhyme with vague,
But looks like it...miles from the Hague...
Good for booze and mixers, shite for Tewntysixthers
On the continent...only consonants...
Prague

I´m a bit out of practice...who§s this Dervish 2?

 

[Richter]

Dervish2 is a female WUM that hates Heinze and wants us to sign Michael Tonge.