Back by very popular demand is the return of Ask The Opposition. Our segment where we ask fans of opposing teams forums some questions and post a selection of the responses back on here.
This week, I asked Newcastle United fans at Toontastic some questions. Thanks to them for the replies - a great bunch. Warning: Language is a bit NSFW.
Our next game after this is against Liverpool
and the newbies are tough to get questions from, so if any of you have any questions you'd like to be asked, please contribute. Would be much appreciated.Q01: By the end of his spell at Liverpool, Rafa Benitez was a fan favourite and is still seen as huge figure there. Other than the Championship trophy, he didn’t win anything at Newcastle United but did well despite the lack of investment and is seemingly hugely popular at Newcastle United too. What did you make of his time in charge of Newcastle United and how do you feel about him?
wykikitoon: It wasn't just Rafa's management of the team that made him popular. He 'got' the city. He 'got' the region and the people. As a manager he got the best out of the players and the resources he had at hand. A great manager and gave us hope with the cancer in charge.
Andrew: Wyki has nailed that one.
The Fish: Nobody expected a manager of his stature taking on the poisoned chalice that is Newcastle United, but he did and while he didn't do enough to keep us up in his first season we as a fanbase knew that not only would he get us back up (if he stayed), he could genuinely build something here. His football was defensive and pragmatic, but despite talkSport gobshites, we don't demand cavalier, Keegan-esque football. Just the presence of a plan, committed players and effectiveness. Benitez engaged with the community, understood that Newcastle fans aren't the stereotypes we're portrayed to be and delivered on the pitch. I came to love the end of a game watching Benitez fold away his glasses, pop them in his pocket; job done. He'll get a good reception whenever he returns.
Dr Gloom: Massively over-performed, given meagre resources. A travesty that a world class manager wasn't backed, but typical of the fat parasite Ashley
Howmanheyman: An excellent manager biting his lip working for absolute amateurs and villains and managing to calm everyone down. It rubbed off.
Andrew: Wyki has nailed that one.
The Fish: Nobody expected a manager of his stature taking on the poisoned chalice that is Newcastle United, but he did and while he didn't do enough to keep us up in his first season we as a fanbase knew that not only would he get us back up (if he stayed), he could genuinely build something here. His football was defensive and pragmatic, but despite talkSport gobshites, we don't demand cavalier, Keegan-esque football. Just the presence of a plan, committed players and effectiveness. Benitez engaged with the community, understood that Newcastle fans aren't the stereotypes we're portrayed to be and delivered on the pitch. I came to love the end of a game watching Benitez fold away his glasses, pop them in his pocket; job done. He'll get a good reception whenever he returns.
Dr Gloom: Massively over-performed, given meagre resources. A travesty that a world class manager wasn't backed, but typical of the fat parasite Ashley
Howmanheyman: An excellent manager biting his lip working for absolute amateurs and villains and managing to calm everyone down. It rubbed off.
Q02: Going from Rafa Benitez to Steve Bruce must have been crushing. He was an unpopular appointment before he managed his first game yet you have beaten Spurs this season. What were your first thoughts on his appointment, how do you play under him (has he changed your thoughts on him?) and how do you think you’ve gone from a 1:0 win away to Spurs to failing to win in five games since?
wykikitoon: It was always going to be difficult coming after Rafa, but he is inept as a manager. That was clear to see and he shouldn't be in charge of any team above the Championship. The win v spurs was pure luck. Spurs didnt take their changes, we took our one. Look at the attendances dropping. Under Rafa there were games where we had 11 men behind the ball but we always had that hope we could nick a goal or hold out. Bruce, feck that.
Andrew: Hes shite, we're shite, we're less than the sum of our parts with him in charge while we were more under Rafa. There is no "yet you have beaten spurs..." point to be made, Spurs are all over the place this season and we were lucky, failing to win since is the norm based on our manager and our performances.
The Fish: Out of touch owner, employs out of touch manager to play football that's out of date. He's shit, and if, as expected, Ashley delays sacking him, we'll be too far adrift when Tony Pulis is brought in to replace him with 8 games to go. He's playing some of our best players out of position, he's rushing injured players back, he's immediately destroyed the defensive solidity we had under Benitez and he'll stymie the progress of Almiron, Joelinton, Longstaff et al. feck the cabbage faced feck.
Dr Gloom: Bruce is a terrible, terrible manager who plays people out of position and openly admits he doesn't believe in tactics. No other PL could go near him.
Howmanheyman: Bruce went to my school and is from the same neck of the woods although a bit older than me. I like to see a local lad do well but he's just not good enough to work with under Clowns and have players foisted on him. I doubt he'd he'd be good enough if he had a free hand tbh.
Andrew: Hes shite, we're shite, we're less than the sum of our parts with him in charge while we were more under Rafa. There is no "yet you have beaten spurs..." point to be made, Spurs are all over the place this season and we were lucky, failing to win since is the norm based on our manager and our performances.
The Fish: Out of touch owner, employs out of touch manager to play football that's out of date. He's shit, and if, as expected, Ashley delays sacking him, we'll be too far adrift when Tony Pulis is brought in to replace him with 8 games to go. He's playing some of our best players out of position, he's rushing injured players back, he's immediately destroyed the defensive solidity we had under Benitez and he'll stymie the progress of Almiron, Joelinton, Longstaff et al. feck the cabbage faced feck.
Dr Gloom: Bruce is a terrible, terrible manager who plays people out of position and openly admits he doesn't believe in tactics. No other PL could go near him.
Howmanheyman: Bruce went to my school and is from the same neck of the woods although a bit older than me. I like to see a local lad do well but he's just not good enough to work with under Clowns and have players foisted on him. I doubt he'd he'd be good enough if he had a free hand tbh.
Q03: We’ve both easily got the most unpopular owners in the league (by the fans of the respective clubs at least), but it seems your reign of misery is almost at an end with you linked to a takeover before the season started. What’s the latest, how do you feel about the potential takeover and do you think Mike Ashley will actually sell?
wykikitoon: There is and will never be a takeover whilst we are in the Prem or be in the Championship with the hope of Prem football. The only way this cancer is to go is to stay down. His pricing of the club is too high and his demands are mad. Whatever the media say its bollocks. he is here to stay.
Andrew: If you think "news of a takeover" means we're going to be taken over you haven't been paying attention. It is interesting actually if that question is a window into the minds of other clubs fans. This is the 4th "takeover" in 18 months and all any of them have done is provided ashley with an excuse not to spend any money. he has no intention of selling to anything less than a total lunatic who will give him a fortune and let him keep his grubby hands in on advertising his shit brands and retail.
The Fish: No chance of a takeover unless some oil state throws more than we're worth at Ashley, and agrees to Sports Direct keeping merchandising rights on our gear and Sports Direct signage blighting St James' park.
Dr Gloom: It's all bluster to divert attention. For some unfathomable reason, Ashley doesn't genuinely want to sell and won't go until he has a coronary.
Howmanheyman: What takeover? The cnut isn't selling unless a lunatic gives him the asking price AND let's him keep all of the benefits he already gets for his other businesses at NUFC's expense.
Andrew: If you think "news of a takeover" means we're going to be taken over you haven't been paying attention. It is interesting actually if that question is a window into the minds of other clubs fans. This is the 4th "takeover" in 18 months and all any of them have done is provided ashley with an excuse not to spend any money. he has no intention of selling to anything less than a total lunatic who will give him a fortune and let him keep his grubby hands in on advertising his shit brands and retail.
The Fish: No chance of a takeover unless some oil state throws more than we're worth at Ashley, and agrees to Sports Direct keeping merchandising rights on our gear and Sports Direct signage blighting St James' park.
Dr Gloom: It's all bluster to divert attention. For some unfathomable reason, Ashley doesn't genuinely want to sell and won't go until he has a coronary.
Howmanheyman: What takeover? The cnut isn't selling unless a lunatic gives him the asking price AND let's him keep all of the benefits he already gets for his other businesses at NUFC's expense.
Q04: If a takeover were to happen, who realistically would you like to be your next manager (assuming Bruce doesn’t become an unmitigated success) and why?
wykikitoon: If Ashley is gone that would be enough for me. As long as it isnt the rehashed 'jobs for the boys' managers, i.e Fat Sam et al I couldnt care.
Andrew: Ideally our new owner could somehow take us slightly back in time and get hold of the wildly successful manager we had last season. Failing that I've no idea, as Wyki says, avoid the jobs for the cnuts old british manager merry-go-round and I'll be happy enough.
The Fish: Personally like to see Howe. The football is good, he gives young lads a fair go, he'd be able to work within a budget (I'm assuming we're not going to be taken over by a Mansour figure), we're a "bigger" club than Bournemouth and so when he inevitably ends up managing an elite club it wouldn't be as seismic a shift from 'plucky little Bournemouth'.
Dr Gloom: It's fantasy land, so no point in even playing that game
Howmanheyman: N/A
Andrew: Ideally our new owner could somehow take us slightly back in time and get hold of the wildly successful manager we had last season. Failing that I've no idea, as Wyki says, avoid the jobs for the cnuts old british manager merry-go-round and I'll be happy enough.
The Fish: Personally like to see Howe. The football is good, he gives young lads a fair go, he'd be able to work within a budget (I'm assuming we're not going to be taken over by a Mansour figure), we're a "bigger" club than Bournemouth and so when he inevitably ends up managing an elite club it wouldn't be as seismic a shift from 'plucky little Bournemouth'.
Dr Gloom: It's fantasy land, so no point in even playing that game
Howmanheyman: N/A
Q05: We were linked to Sean Longstaff in the summer but the move didn’t happen with Newcastle United resolute that he wasn’t for sale. What is he like as a player and how happy are you to have kept hold of him?
wykikitoon: Chuffed we have kept him for now, but think he will leave in Jan to you. MASSIVE potential, but was delivering already to the latter end of last season. If he played for you, city or Chelsea the media would be dripping with cum. Just look at Mount. Longstaff was doing that last season and hardly anything.
Andrew: Under a manager with a plan I'd have been gutted to see him go and see us miss out on a talented midfielder, under this melted wax faced prick it I'd be desperate to get out if I were him, if hes here beyond this season hes finished as a "prospect" and will stay at his current level. If he goes somewhere where he gets well coached and gets games he'll comfortably be an international.
The Fish: He's a good player, had a very good end to last season and on that form was within the National team conversation. He'll struggle to find that form under Bruce. He's got a good range of passing, intelligent use of the ball, not afraid of a tackle, good engine. Dunno if he's quite ready for a step up, and so I'm delighted we kept him. Don't be fooled though, Ashley's unwillingness to sell, was only because you didn't match his inflated valuation. If you had, Longstaff would have been sold, regardless of the impact that had on the squad.
Dr Gloom: looked promising talent last year under Rafa. Has looked like a fish out of water under Bruce - though he isn't alone there tbf
Howmanheyman: Looked immense last season when he broke through and I remember Gazza breaking through. (Different players but the impact was similar-ish). However that'se getting carried away a bit and Sean got fecked and has missed a bit of football with a bad injury. It hasn't helped making his comeback in the shambles at the minute and he's struggled a bit by the early standards he set. Understandable.
Andrew: Under a manager with a plan I'd have been gutted to see him go and see us miss out on a talented midfielder, under this melted wax faced prick it I'd be desperate to get out if I were him, if hes here beyond this season hes finished as a "prospect" and will stay at his current level. If he goes somewhere where he gets well coached and gets games he'll comfortably be an international.
The Fish: He's a good player, had a very good end to last season and on that form was within the National team conversation. He'll struggle to find that form under Bruce. He's got a good range of passing, intelligent use of the ball, not afraid of a tackle, good engine. Dunno if he's quite ready for a step up, and so I'm delighted we kept him. Don't be fooled though, Ashley's unwillingness to sell, was only because you didn't match his inflated valuation. If you had, Longstaff would have been sold, regardless of the impact that had on the squad.
Dr Gloom: looked promising talent last year under Rafa. Has looked like a fish out of water under Bruce - though he isn't alone there tbf
Howmanheyman: Looked immense last season when he broke through and I remember Gazza breaking through. (Different players but the impact was similar-ish). However that'se getting carried away a bit and Sean got fecked and has missed a bit of football with a bad injury. It hasn't helped making his comeback in the shambles at the minute and he's struggled a bit by the early standards he set. Understandable.
Q06: Full thoughts on Andy Carroll and his return to the club?
wykikitoon: Meh
Andrew: Pointless, couldn't care less.
The Fish: Low risk deal, nice to see the big lad in a black and white shirt, will be surprised if he manages more than 10 games.
Dr Gloom: Pathetic attempt to placate the more moronic wing of our supporter base
Howmanheyman: A pure gimmick by a desperate 'board'
and a desperate manager who knows he has a job because he's expected to do as he's told.
Andrew: Pointless, couldn't care less.
The Fish: Low risk deal, nice to see the big lad in a black and white shirt, will be surprised if he manages more than 10 games.
Dr Gloom: Pathetic attempt to placate the more moronic wing of our supporter base
Howmanheyman: A pure gimmick by a desperate 'board'
Q07: What is your favourite memory in your time supporting Newcastle United?
wykikitoon: Maybe a little odd, but that win against Feynoord in the CL where Bellamy scored in the 90th minute to put us through to the knockout stage. fecking mental.
Andrew: I actually can't pick one from the time before Ashley, there were a lot. Since then I'd say beating you 3-0 in 11/12. That season was a fun ride, manager and owner both wankers but we had such a good team to watch. I really enjoyed us beating Rodgers swansea that season too, they were the least interesting team to watch in the world, passing sideways with god knows how much possession for the whole match and never made a chance.
The Fish: Personally it was the first home game of the 01/02 season because I arrived at my usual seat only to find my globe-trotting-for-business dad had secretly got a season ticket beside me. Me worrying about the type of swearing and fury I get up to at the match displeasing the old man, only for the first dodgy call by the ref to get a "REFEREE YA feckIN BASTARD" from my normally reserved father.
Match-wise it's a toss up between beating Barcelona 3-2, the 4-3 against you lot when Keane lost his head, going top at Christmas under Sir Bob by winning at Highbury for the first time in.. feck knows, or Shearer's hattrick against Leicester. Oh and Sir Bobby's first home game in charge. 8-0, Shearer got five in a post-Gullit palate cleanser.
Dr Gloom: The Keegan years by a million miles. To feel like an ambitious club, a chairman who broke global transfer records and a manager who got his team playing the most scintillating attacking football - seems like a lifetime ago. All that was missing was a trophy and we were a whisker away. Best PL team ever not to win the title.
Howmanheyman: 1992-93 season overall or possibly the season after where we finished 3rd the PL after promotion. Haven't time to go into it but if you're my age, 46, it shouldn't need saying. Dire beforehand, Keegan was the pied piper, amazing football, feel good factor, terraces, great away days, young and on the piss. Happy days.
Andrew: I actually can't pick one from the time before Ashley, there were a lot. Since then I'd say beating you 3-0 in 11/12. That season was a fun ride, manager and owner both wankers but we had such a good team to watch. I really enjoyed us beating Rodgers swansea that season too, they were the least interesting team to watch in the world, passing sideways with god knows how much possession for the whole match and never made a chance.
The Fish: Personally it was the first home game of the 01/02 season because I arrived at my usual seat only to find my globe-trotting-for-business dad had secretly got a season ticket beside me. Me worrying about the type of swearing and fury I get up to at the match displeasing the old man, only for the first dodgy call by the ref to get a "REFEREE YA feckIN BASTARD" from my normally reserved father.
Dr Gloom: The Keegan years by a million miles. To feel like an ambitious club, a chairman who broke global transfer records and a manager who got his team playing the most scintillating attacking football - seems like a lifetime ago. All that was missing was a trophy and we were a whisker away. Best PL team ever not to win the title.
Howmanheyman: 1992-93 season overall or possibly the season after where we finished 3rd the PL after promotion. Haven't time to go into it but if you're my age, 46, it shouldn't need saying. Dire beforehand, Keegan was the pied piper, amazing football, feel good factor, terraces, great away days, young and on the piss. Happy days.
Q08: Which three Newcastle United players do you think will be ones to watch this season?
wykikitoon: Meh
Andrew: Under current management, none of them. As individuals on their own merits, Schar is our best player (imo) Maximin seems fun and Almiron may eventually get a bit of luck and start doing something.
The Fish: Under Bruce? Nobody's going to shine. But at a push I'd say Saint Maximin looks a one man highlight reel, Longstaff will hopefully develop with experience and Schar remains a very good attacking centreback.
Dr Gloom: I couldn't care less, franky. The worst thing about a decade of Ashley is how apathetic we have all become.
Howmanheyman: Three?
Andrew: Under current management, none of them. As individuals on their own merits, Schar is our best player (imo) Maximin seems fun and Almiron may eventually get a bit of luck and start doing something.
The Fish: Under Bruce? Nobody's going to shine. But at a push I'd say Saint Maximin looks a one man highlight reel, Longstaff will hopefully develop with experience and Schar remains a very good attacking centreback.
Dr Gloom: I couldn't care less, franky. The worst thing about a decade of Ashley is how apathetic we have all become.
Howmanheyman: Three?
Q09: How do you expect both Manchester United and Newcastle United to do in the league this season?
wykikitoon: Us, Relegation. You. 7th
Andrew: You'll be lucky to be in europe next season, we'll be lucky to be in this league.
The Fish: Honestly, because of the shitshow of the ownership I'd say both will fall below their very different standards. Solskjaer doesn't look up to much and the big players aren't delivering. With Leicester and West Ham going great guns I could see your blue neighbours and Liverpool sewing up the top spots early on, Spurs, Leicester taking the 3rd & 4th spots, you, Chelsea, Arsenal and the likes of West Ham and Everton (if they change their manager) gunning for 5-9th. You need Woodward gone, Solskjaer gone, Pochettino + a few sensible signings would have you challenging again in a couple of years, but you're a ways off. We'll go down.
Dr Gloom: You'll probably finish somewhere around the top 6. We will be lucky to stop up. We're relying on there being three teams even shitter than us
Howmanheyman: You could well be in for another 26 year stretch pre-1992 when it comes to winning the league but as like then I'm sure whoever captains you will still get their hands on the odd trophy. Your consolation is our fantasy. Said from day one we're fecked and nothing has suggested I'm wrong. The club is fecked anyway while the parasite is sucking us so can't say I'm as arsed as I normally would be.
Andrew: You'll be lucky to be in europe next season, we'll be lucky to be in this league.
The Fish: Honestly, because of the shitshow of the ownership I'd say both will fall below their very different standards. Solskjaer doesn't look up to much and the big players aren't delivering. With Leicester and West Ham going great guns I could see your blue neighbours and Liverpool sewing up the top spots early on, Spurs, Leicester taking the 3rd & 4th spots, you, Chelsea, Arsenal and the likes of West Ham and Everton (if they change their manager) gunning for 5-9th. You need Woodward gone, Solskjaer gone, Pochettino + a few sensible signings would have you challenging again in a couple of years, but you're a ways off. We'll go down.
Dr Gloom: You'll probably finish somewhere around the top 6. We will be lucky to stop up. We're relying on there being three teams even shitter than us
Howmanheyman: You could well be in for another 26 year stretch pre-1992 when it comes to winning the league but as like then I'm sure whoever captains you will still get their hands on the odd trophy. Your consolation is our fantasy. Said from day one we're fecked and nothing has suggested I'm wrong. The club is fecked anyway while the parasite is sucking us so can't say I'm as arsed as I normally would be.
Q10: Which XI would you like to see your team field against us?
wykikitoon: Meh
Andrew: Honestly don't care.
The Fish: Dubravka
Manquillo, Schar, Lascelles, Dummett,Willems
Ki, Longstaff
Saint Maximin, Almiron, Atsu
Joelinton
Dr Gloom: See answer to question 8
Howmanheyman: Couldn't give a shiny shite.
Andrew: Honestly don't care.
The Fish: Dubravka
Manquillo, Schar, Lascelles, Dummett,Willems
Ki, Longstaff
Saint Maximin, Almiron, Atsu
Joelinton
Dr Gloom: See answer to question 8
Howmanheyman: Couldn't give a shiny shite.
Q11: Finally, your predictions for the match?
wykikitoon: 5 nil dry bumming. The media will be wanking Sir Ole off once again.
Andrew: You're sort of crap, but we're really crap. We'll make you look good.
The Fish: Comfortable away win 0-2/3
Dr Gloom: You will win
Howmanheyman: 0-3
Andrew: You're sort of crap, but we're really crap. We'll make you look good.
The Fish: Comfortable away win 0-2/3
Dr Gloom: You will win
Howmanheyman: 0-3
... Though I would argue this is a battle to see who truly is really crap