Eden Hazard | "I am signing for Chelsea"

[711]

I've just heard from my sources that we are willing to meet his wage demands. The sticking point is that he wants Old Trafford renamed from The Theatre of Dreams to The Garden of Eden.

Seems fair.

 

[I'm always right]

Eden better sign. The name of my future unborn child is on the line and now I can't find my pistachios. Clearly, I've got my priorities in order.

 

[I'm always right]

I'm going to get a tattoo. Why do us United fans never commit like City fans do? That's why they are champions. Dedication.

good point, but I'd play it safe if I was you, go for one of these....

 

[Pexbo]

That's a great design and it leaves enough room for the names Pogba, Neymar, Girish, Thiago, Clyne and Shwnstgr to be incorporated.

 

[Baxter]

Looking at post count, who has been renamed to "Transfer United Till I Die"?

 

[I'm always right]

Looking at post count, who has been renamed to "Tranfer United Till I Die"?

Tranfer?

 

[vivs]

Vivs, does this apply if we sign Van Wolfswinkel?

Nope but it will if we sign Sneijder.

 

[vivs]

Tranfer?

 

[Baxter]

Tranfer?

I'm typing on my phone. Leave me alone.

 

[ghaliboy]

LOL ffs I was had by that website.
Mate showed it to me (he knew) and I came straight here...

DAMN YOU INTERNETS.

 

[I'm always right]

I'm typing on my phone. Leave me alone.

Ok then, I'll let you off. It's RedRichio

 

[Baxter]

Ok then, I'll let you off. It's RedRichio

Thank you.

 

[SteveJ]

LOL ffs I was had by that website.

Yep, me too. I wanted to believe, so I ignored the adverts for haemorrhoid cream.

 

[ghaliboy]

Yep, me too. I wanted to believe, so I ignored the adverts for haemorrhoid cream.

Lol audible: "feck off"... /goes to redcafe
mum: "What....... WHAT?......"
me: "OH feckING NOTHING... god damn you!"

 

[Redfighter]

I can't believe that there is no fresh news at 11.38pm!!!

 

[vivs]

Found my pistachios! This is a sign from the transfer market gods.

 

[I'm always right]

I can't believe that there is no fresh news at 11.38pm!!!

I've heard something interesting will be revealed at midnight if you have your ears in the right places.

 

[Redfighter]

I've heard something interesting will be revealed at midnight if you have your ears in the right places.

Excellent. I shall wake the wife and kids up in anticipation. They'll be so excited to hear the developments!

 

[Pexbo]

Found my pistachios! This is a sign from the transfer market gods.

Eden has a nut allergy. #Hazard

 

[MUFC07]

Found my pistachios! This is a sign from the transfer market gods.

Moustachious

 

[Team Brian GB]

Chelsea won the Champions League just two days ago and already many of you seem to be cracking up from lack of transfer activity - there is 102 days until the window closes.

 

[I'm always right]

lack of transfer activity

"Lack"?

We have this shit in the bag.

 

[Redfighter]

Chelsea won the Champions League just two days ago and already many of you seem to be cracking up from lack of transfer activity - there is 102 days until the window closes.

Harry Redknapp "likes" this

 

[I'm always right]

Moustachious

 

[KiD MoYeS]

Right, well Sky have clearly fecked us over and it isn't happening.

 

[ghaliboy]

Lol you obsessive muppets!

 

[Art]

thats pretty bad photography cuntlings.

 

[I'm always right]

thats pretty bad photography cuntlings.

He's made his head look like Timmy's from South Park.

 

[prateik]

He's made his head look like Timmy's from South Park.

Peter Crouch?

 

[Relevated]

fecking sergio.

 

[I'm always right]

Peter Crouch?

 

[Art]

He's made his head look like Timmy's from South Park.

 

[Pexbo]

He has the same rapey eyes as Gibson.

 

[KiD MoYeS]

He's made his head look like Timmy's from South Park.

 

[prateik]

We are signing the french Crouch..

 

[KiD MoYeS]

I love silly season.

 

[WR]

Is that Sky sources picture legit? I've not followed this at all. I learned from Sneijdergate.

 

[Maajid]

Is that Sky sources picture legit? I've not followed this at all. I learned from Sneijdergate.

It is. But if you've really learned from Sneijdergate, you'll know that it doesn't mean anything.

 

[KiD MoYeS]

Is that Sky sources picture legit? I've not followed this at all. I learned from Sneijdergate.

Yeah it is, they've been reporting it all day, that Hazard's preferred move is to United.

They said the same with Nasri though...

 

[Damien]

Is that Sky sources picture legit? I've not followed this at all. I learned from Sneijdergate.

It is. StanleyCupboard posted this regarding it, how Darren Can is privy to that information I don't know.

Darren Can ‏@Darren_Can
This 'Sky sources' stuff today, concerning Hazard - suggesting he prefers United. Will try and give some insight into this in next tweets
Darren Can ‏@Darren_Can
From what I know, it's not mercato365, anyone on Twitter or random guess work. Dharmesh Sheth (Man United fan) spoke to Michel Seydoux yday
Darren Can ‏@Darren_Can
Michel Seydoux appeared on camera as he agreed to give people an update on what was going on. Then, with camera off...
Darren Can ‏@Darren_Can
..he may have said off the record that United has the edge. That's what constitutes 'sky sources'.
Darren Can ‏@Darren_Can
That said,Michel Seydoux may have just fed them a duff line. In the grand scheme of things,'Sky sources' isn't 100% fool proof. No source is