Frenkie de Jong | The last muppeting lap

Frenkie to United?

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iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...
If you was a newbie this post alone should be an instant promotion.
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Absolutely fecking brilliant
 
Mickeza said:
Okay this has got very boring now. The squad are back in England next week - time to sort this wage nonsense out.
Click to expand...
Time for an announcement.

It used to be.. There's no value in the transfer market.

Now its, there's no value in the wage market.

Economic levers and all that shite.
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...

This is excellent work :devil: :lol:
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...

Usually these are shit but that's absolute genius well played sir :lol:
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...
:lol: This is actually quite good. Well done
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...

Thoroughly enjoyed that
 
No Love said:
Will he/won’t he, San Andreas and now Eminem… this really is the thread of dreams.
Click to expand...
It's a fascinating thread and am reading / posting with pleasure, but sometimes I look at the number of posts and it comes off like we might be signing a peak Messi or a 25 year old Ronaldo from Madrid....it's Frenkie De Jong- who Barca are happy to let go because they have a couple of 19 year olds who are showing promise

He will be a massive improvement in midfield given we are looking at Fred and McT, but let's face it, he's a deep lying midfielder are we're bouncing around the caf like we're signing someone who's gonna set OT on fire.
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...

Awesome :lol:
 
We need an rvn said:
It's a fascinating thread and am reading / posting with pleasure, but sometimes I look at the number of posts and it comes off like we might be signing a peak Messi or a 25 year old Ronaldo from Madrid....it's Frenkie De Jong- who Barca are happy to let go because they have a couple of 19 year olds who are showing promise

He will be a massive improvement in midfield given we are looking at Fred and McT, but let's face it, he's a deep lying midfielder are we're bouncing around the caf like we're signing someone who's gonna set OT on fire.
Click to expand...


I believe you may have pinpointed why we are up to page 943.
 
We need an rvn said:
It's a fascinating thread and am reading / posting with pleasure, but sometimes I look at the number of posts and it comes off like we might be signing a peak Messi or a 25 year old Ronaldo from Madrid....it's Frenkie De Jong- who Barca are happy to let go because they have a couple of 19 year olds who are showing promise

He will be a massive improvement in midfield given we are looking at Fred and McT, but let's face it, he's a deep lying midfielder are we're bouncing around the caf like we're signing someone who's gonna set OT on fire.
Click to expand...
It's frenkie fecking 4 fingers to you.
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...

Best post in this thread by far :lol:
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...
Bravo
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...
Absolutely brilliant.
 
We need an rvn said:
It's a fascinating thread and am reading / posting with pleasure, but sometimes I look at the number of posts and it comes off like we might be signing a peak Messi or a 25 year old Ronaldo from Madrid....it's Frenkie De Jong- who Barca are happy to let go because they have a couple of 19 year olds who are showing promise

He will be a massive improvement in midfield given we are looking at Fred and McT, but let's face it, he's a deep lying midfielder are we're bouncing around the caf like we're signing someone who's gonna set OT on fire.
Click to expand...
No post suggested we are signing messi or ronaldo. People are excited because he can be a huge upgrade over McFred and of course because new manager wants him. We were one quality midfielder short even when Pogba was around. Then Pogba also left so we need a midfield reinforcement, and we need a good one.
 
Last edited:
Alex hunter on talksport probably best explained the situation with barca finances and the de Jong transfer saga

Everything points de Jong 100% wanting to stay at barca and the only way he moves if he is forced out of the club kicking and screaming by not accepting to lower his wages to stay at barca.

I really don't see why we entertaining this move, i know ten hag wants him but it's degrading to the club that we are seen as the booby prize for de jong and would like to see us moving away from such situations like this.

what is it going to look like if after chasing after de Jong all summer, he does end up preferring to cut off a huge chunk of his weekly salary to stay at barca over joining us on improved wages.
 
Lee565 said:
Everything points de Jong 100% wanting to stay at barca and the only way he moves if he is forced out of the club kicking and screaming by not accepting to lower his wages to stay at barca.

I really don't see why we entertaining this move, i know ten hag wants him but it's degrading to the club that we are seen as the booby prize for de jong and would like to see us moving away from such situations like this.

what is it going to look like if after chasing after de Jong all summer, he does end up preferring to cut off a huge chunk of his weekly salary to stay at barca over joining us on improved wages.
Click to expand...
After agreeing a deal we have already stepped aside and waiting. It is not like united is running, begging and making fool of ourselves.
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...
:lol: nice one
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...
Brilliant :lol:
 
iHicksy said:
In true transfer muppetry madness. To the tune of Stan:

My team wants me sold, I wonder why
I went out on tour at all
Morning rain clouds up my window
I'm Avoiding Ten Hag’s calls,
And even if I could, i'd call my agent today,
But my wage from this transfer stall
Reminds me, that it’s not so bad
It’s not so bad.

Dear Frankie, I text you but you still ain’t callin’
I left my snapchat, my whatsapp, and my home phone at the bottom
I put two offers in in autumn, you must not’ve got em
There probably was a problem with our fax machine or something’
But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
If we have to start with Martial, guess what ima do?
Im gonna have to sell Ronnie
I read about Xavi too, I’m sorry
We had the same thing with Ole, that bitch wouldn’t play Donnie
I know you hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got those old Ajax training ground videos with you and Staam
My phones full of your insta reels and your pictures man
Your transfer turned redcafe into Rawk too, this thread is fat

Anyways I hope you get this man, hit me back
Just to chat, i don’t mean to nag,
This is Hag
Click to expand...

These are normally horrendous but my god..... bravo my man, bravo. Brilliant :lol:
 
Ish said:
This bit especially :lol:


But anyways, feck it, what’s been up man? How’s Xavi's Barca?
I heard they're in a lot of debt, at least, according to Marca
Click to expand...
Line was so good that I'll let it slide that either Barca/Marca has to be wrongly pronunciated to make it fit.
 
Tired of the saga but loving this thread to bits! I don't even come to look for any news anymore. Just to enjoy the height of sheer muppetry. Keep it up folks. Every little cheer helps!
 
Tony247 said:
No post suggested we are signing messi or ronaldo. People are excited because he can be a huge upgrade over McFred and of course because new manager wants him. We were one quality midfielder short even when Pogba was around. Then we sold Pogba so we need a midfield reinforcement, and we need a good one.
Click to expand...
Post makes sense. Not over-hyped or muppet. I'd happily sign him and excited but I don't get 943 pages over someone who keeps saying he doesn't want to come
 
iHickey really padding the numbers in this thread, the officials may have to take a look at how many post have been recognizing his brilliant song and bring the page count back to a more accurate representation of muppetry.
 
We need an rvn said:
I have no idea what you're saying. I feel like it's a repeat of my dinner table discussion with my 12 &13 year old kids who quote tik tok shite like i'm meant to understand it. 4 fingers??? Is it meant to be a double birdy
Click to expand...
I hope your 12& 13 aren't watching Snatch . That's what it's from
 
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