#COVID19 journal, March 21st, Los Angeles:
Here's how it rolled for me:
I flew into Los Angeles late Thursday night, March 12th, after back-to-back speaking gigs, and few adventures. There was chaos at LAX as people were trying to rush in from all over so I was stuck in that for a while. My adrenal system was already beyond drained and depleted, also because I have been dealing with a lot of deaths, grief, and loss in personal life since the end of last year. So when I felt strange, the day after walking into my home and completely exhausted, I just thought it was all those months catching up. From Friday (March 13th onwards) my body had mellow shivers, chills, and flashes. All sporadically. Saturday, March 14th I was feeling better. Sunday (15th) my brain and entire head were throbbing at a rate I have never experienced. By Monday (16th) night, my lungs were crackling, and at night time, even if I managed to sleep for a brief period, I was shivering… My taste was gone, and I barely had any appetite. I was gasping for breath Monday night… alongside having a runny nose, sore throat, severe headache and cough (releasing a lot of phlegm which was not one of the COVID-19 symptoms.) During this whole time, my friends and I were trying to get medical assistance but given the current US healthcare system (which I may write about some other time) we weren’t successful till Tuesday, March 17th afternoon. Now, these are some of the very extreme symptoms. I know several others who have had barely either of these and were still tested positive like me.
If you are like me, with a high tolerance of pain, you have to be extra careful and stay vigilant of rising symptoms. Be in touch with your body. I am now in quarantine (which I was already practicing after I flew into LA) with strict measures and watch over my breathing. I will just have to fight it out. Every day is a struggle. Walking a few steps drains me out, taking a shower is an expedition… trying to cook ends up as a disaster. I have to take it day by day. The closest I can relate this pain and weakness to is when I had contracted septicemia from a kidney infection a couple of years ago. On the brighter side, as one of my doctor friends said, once/if I fight this out within “phase one,” I will be immune to the virus and be able to serve communities where needed. The predictions are saying, 56% of Californians alone could become infected in the next 8weeks, an estimated 25.5 million of nearly 40 million. Within a week now, we are WAY past containment.
Mother Nature lashes back against the centuries-long oppression we have been doing on her. We have “developed” in high-rises constantly mutating her and bringing her precious species to extinctions, causing their habitats to utter destructions - its high time human civilization paid the price. The universe is forcing us to pause EVERYTHING because we didn’t listen to her many times before. Even though we forced the climate crisis. There is nothing we can do now than to surrender, and the sooner we do it the better.
May we take this time of social-distancing to look inside ourselves, practice compassion and gratitude towards the interconnectedness of all of us and all beings. I am immensely grateful to the nurses, doctors, to each front-line workers, not just in this city of Angels but everywhere. My friends who are non-stop with me, virtually and in spirit. My army of teachers and healers from around the world who are helping me heal both my mind and body.
#COVID19 journal, March 22nd, Los Angeles:
Those here know that this past week getting grocery in LA has been really complicated, esp being a vegan, as all the supermarkets are completely wiped out from people hoarding so I just ended up loading up on carb whenever I had any appetite. I was not mindful of the fact that viruses ride & multiply on carb (also sugar & dairy which I don’t take.) As a result, I accidentally amplified the virus, which unfortunately then spread to my lungs big time. (March 21st) I was barely breathing and early AM (before doctor’s intervention) I felt like someone put a vacuum cleaner inside my mouth and was sucking all the wind/life force out of me. It took me all of yesterday morning and night to come out from this choking feeling- following medication, a boost of protein and the care of my miraculous doctors. One of whom, I should also mention, is Dr. Jin (i call her “The Djinn,” lol) is Chinese and if it wasn’t for her insight & miraculous herbal cocktails, I probably wouldn’t even be here right now. She has also been treating me on credit, not worried at all how/if I will pay her back. That's how kind and genuinely selfless this "human" along with those working on the frontline round the clock is. I pray all the racist/xenophobic slurs/attacks towards Asians and other groups, who make the backbone of America stop swiftly.
Our first priority now is to come out of this with a 100% intact lungs. There have been several cases of COVID19 recoveries with almost 40-60% damage to the lungs. So if you could send your energy to my lungs, respiratory system and heart (so it can pump the nutrients to the max) I’d be ever grateful. Then given i don't contract any more infections or other complications, if I manage to fight the virus out of my lungs and elsewhere in the next week or so, it will take weeks/months of recovery to be 100% depending upon my mind’s will.
I am finally starting to breathe normally since this afternoon but still very slow and weak… the entire brain, head, neck and other body parts throb constantly and amplify when things get quiet. My mind is in heightened awareness and is watching the constant sensation of this virus. I've been put on an amplified-protein diet alongside medicine, thanks to my friends on many missions to get me the right stuff (yes this city also has angels who hoard on compassion!)
As you may know, you might have it without showing any symptoms at all. Those of you who are prepping to remain safe, be vigilant to cut stuff out of your diet that may amplify it, boost up on protein and build your immune system. It's very important to keep ourselves happy during these times while social-distancing. Eating healthy, hydrating, praying, meditating. I hope you all are taking time off the internet, unplugging from the current world order, listening to good music, appreciating the air we are able to breathe, reading books and doing whatever it takes to keep joyful. Also breathing practices to engage in de-stressing really helps. Laugh hard, that’s how the nervous system stays healthy!! (an extra bit for me too - my throat, and everything else hurt and i haven't laughed for a LONG while!)
#COVID19 journal, March 25th, Los Angeles
Am not out of danger-zone yet, my body is fighting every hour like it never has before, as if it's in death zone in the Himalayas. We are overwhelmed with so many heartfelt msgs, thank you so much for your prayers... don't worry and understand am not able to respond because focusing all my energies to get rid & heal from this virus. Apparently, i may have gotten the worst strain.