Players whose names are accurate

[Big Ben Foster]

In contrast to the other thread...

Mark de Man - center back experienced in man-marking
Samir Handanovic - uses his hands
Jamal Blackman - is a black man

 

[Salt Bailly]

He card Icardi.

 

[DepaysCowboyHat]

Danny Drinkwater - he really drinks water

 

[stepic]

Callum Guy

Is a guy

 

[Hound Dog]

Dean Windass - I am pretty sure he farted at least once in his life

 

[Lay]

George Best - was the best

 

[MDFC Manager]

Bastian Schweinsteiger

 

[Scarlett Dracarys]

Coutinho - is a cnut
Muller - is a mule

 

[Red Star One]

John Stones - weighs few stones

 

[AllGoodNamesRGone]

Steve Bould - went bold

 

[GoonerBear]

Rafael Scheidt 1st 1 that springs to mind.

 

[Solius]

Spoiler

 

[Red Stone]

Wan-Bissaka - Is not two or more Bissakas.

 

[WeePat]

Spoiler

Is misspelling the word played the text equivalent of crossing your fingers behind your back? He's technically not lying here.

 

[duffer]

Rudiger is rude.
Zouma is fast.
Kepa is a keeper.
Mendy mended our defence.

 

[AllGoodNamesRGone]

John Terry - most of the c*nts I have met in life have been called John or Terry so his name checks out.

 

[Mike Smalling]

Dean Whitehead - Has a white head

 

[Vernon Philander]

Saka plays soccer

 

[Green_Red]

Dion Dublin, since he retired he has definitely be doubling in size, mince pies, up the stairs to the left.

 

[WeePat]

Mo Salah - does actually pray his salah

 

[AllGoodNamesRGone]

Creedence Clearwater Couto - to have become a professional footballer I guess you could say he was a fortunate son.

 

[12OunceEpilogue]

Mane - Had his hair done earlier this year

 

[Lyricist]

The Icelandic guy that scored the winning goal against England back in the euros in France.

Sigthorsson
In german:
Sieg= win Tor= goal Sohn= son
Kolbeinn Wingoalson

 

[Big Ben Foster]

Shola Ameobi - useless as an amoeba
Danny Shittu - shit defender
Didier Deschamps - de champ of de world
Steve Death - is no longer alive (RIP)

 

[Scarlett Dracarys]

Creedence Clearwater Couto - to have become a professional footballer I guess you could say he was a fortunate son.

Or maybe he's never seen the rain.

 

[El Zoido]

Kyle Walker - often walks

 

[BlackBen]

Junior tHoillet- shit player

 

[Rinnegan240]

Chris Wood - Possesses wood.

 

[BlueMoonOutcast]

Eric Dier. Works better spoken than typed but still.

 

[Oranges038]

Fred - Plays how you would expect someone called Fred to play.

 

[redrobed]

Paul Scoles scores goals - generational talent and he did score goals

 

[Motorman]

David seaman was conceived from

 

[horsechoker]

Ben White

He's white

 

[djembatheking]

Robbie Fowler - been booked a few times

 

[sincher]

Alphonse Areola - a bit of a tit

 

[horsechoker]

Son - is someone's son
Kevin Friend - is someone's friend (not mine)

 

[CallyRed]

Stefan Kuntz

 

[djembatheking]

Brendan Rodgers his wife

 

[Pughnichi]

Kieron dyer

 

[Van Piorsing]

Wes Brown is a true statement and Cristiano is as good striker as Ronaldo.

Kompany works for a charity company, despite looking like an evil robot. Vincent is a proper name for a robot.