One of my biggest regrets was when I was 18 I was ordering a round at the bar and this older woman, probably about 23-25, interrupted just as I was ordering and said summit like 'and a white wine spritzer' adding it onto my round. I said 'no thanks, I only really drink Guinness' and walked off. It was only after I had walked away did it dawn on me what just happened. I was gutted because not only was she an older woman but she was also a bit fit. Turns out she was a life guard an' all. Life can be a bitch sometimes.
This unfortunately is probably no the stupidest thing I have ever said to a lass I liked, but it is something that has always stood out in my mind. It was when I was back in college and this lass asked me if I wanted to go shopping with her, can't remember what for now. Anyway my response was summit like 'I don't know, I'm not really much of a shopper. It's not that I don't like shopping, it's actually not that bad. It's just that I have problems with the whole carrier bag side of shopping. You see I can't carry a plastic bag and walk, it's a condition I have. It's actually quite sad really, my leg tends to hit the bag, causing it to spin round dramatically, the handles wrap themselves round my fingers and cut off all the circulation. And what happens then? Thats right. Rigormortis.'
I was trying to be funny, looking back on it I realize what an idiot I sounded. Everyone knows shopping bags don't cause rigormortis.