Missing a goal in a live game because the broadcaster is too busy showing replays of a minor incident. As just happened in the Chelsea V Leeds game.
Things about football that get you unreasonably annoyed…
- Thread starter sugar_kane
- Start date
The phrase "Mentality monsters".
Simulation. It's become too normal for players to pretend to be injured to try and sway the ref's opinion.
It's childish and silly, watching grown men act like they've been shot when they've had the tiniest bit of contact with an opponent.
It's childish and silly, watching grown men act like they've been shot when they've had the tiniest bit of contact with an opponent.
The xG stat. Absolute shit metric and annoys the shit out of me when I see it being thrown around as if its the be all and end all.
At Arsenal, the tradition is that everyone has to wear the same as the captain. So when Adams was being a hard nut wearing a t-shirt in mid-December, all out foreign lads would wear sleeves.
DRUMS and players that have a top knot, gleaming white teeth, neck Tats, cross themselves whilst hopping on one leg, kissing their wrist and then being shit. Mind you, I'm old and brought up on Best, Law and Charlton.
Why didn't you just say Darwin Nunez?
Our fanbase - every time a decision doesn't go our way it's a conspiracy or corruption against us
Not about the actual game but when accounts quote players and in order to not have to include the question they essentially 'make up' the first part of the quote as if the player responded in that way repeating the question.
Some examples (made up but based on real stuff I've seen):
Bruno - "My 100th goal? I don't think about it. The most important is the 3 points." When they could just as easily say Bruno (on his 100th goal) etc..
"A move to Bayern? I don't think about rumours only concentrating on the season."
"My relationship with the manager? It is good, we are aligned."
It fecks me off
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Can you imagine Harry Kane going “Tuchel leaving?”. I hate it!
Just say [on Tuchel leaving] ffs
Our goal difference
People complaining because they think xg are meaningless and people who think xg are extremely meaningful for a single game.
It is a useful stat that carries more weight, the bigger the sample size is. But for a single game, it needs to be taken with a pinch of salt.
It is a useful stat that carries more weight, the bigger the sample size is. But for a single game, it needs to be taken with a pinch of salt.
Every player on City separately being labeled best in the world at some point this season by the media or Pep. They all can’t be. Pick one
Paul Merson gets me irrationally annoyed yet I still continue to get suckered into his ludicrous, inane opinions.
He’s now stated how he would be ‘shocked’ if England don’t win the Euros, how no other nation can live with them except ‘maybe France’. I’d think that view would be arrogant and stupid enough as it is before he goes on to say he would only ‘pick van Dijk and Mbappe’ from other nations and benchwarmers Grealish and Rashford would walk into any national first team.
As an Englishman, I feel optimistic and think we do have a great squad, but ultimately, we’re practically a footnote on the world/European stage and only have a WC from over 50 years to gloat about. I wish someone would call out Merson for his utterly twattish statements, the raging tosspot.
He’s now stated how he would be ‘shocked’ if England don’t win the Euros, how no other nation can live with them except ‘maybe France’. I’d think that view would be arrogant and stupid enough as it is before he goes on to say he would only ‘pick van Dijk and Mbappe’ from other nations and benchwarmers Grealish and Rashford would walk into any national first team.
As an Englishman, I feel optimistic and think we do have a great squad, but ultimately, we’re practically a footnote on the world/European stage and only have a WC from over 50 years to gloat about. I wish someone would call out Merson for his utterly twattish statements, the raging tosspot.
Wages. Have to try (and recently have succeeded in) rarely ever thinking about it. Cause when I ruminate on a 19 year old kicking a bag of wind around and getting in a week what a nurse or any other skilled essential worker gets in several years it grinds my gears to powder. It never stops being fecking outrageous but we all just get on with it.
People calling it "the Prem"
Any one who makes a reference to a players stats on "FIFA"
Pundits giving MOTM to the person who's scored
Central defenders being target for corners. Yes he's 6ft 3 but he's not scored since Labour were last in. Meanwhile your shorter striker has 25 headed goals in the last two months but he's standing outside the box?
The fact they remove the score in the corner on the telly when showing a reply. I really wouldn't get confused and think the thing I just saw but was happening again at 0.3X speed, really.
When VAR is displayed on screen, showing that a goal was onside and despite it being the same feed the commentators see, they have to pretend for a further 10 to 15 seconds that the outcome is still a mystery.
Fans who miss games because "the wife wanted me to take her shopping". Funerals? Weddings? Even birthdays? Sure. But if your commitment to your team is that if you're other half wants you to take them to Iceland you can't say no, then I question you.
Any one who makes a reference to a players stats on "FIFA"
Pundits giving MOTM to the person who's scored
Central defenders being target for corners. Yes he's 6ft 3 but he's not scored since Labour were last in. Meanwhile your shorter striker has 25 headed goals in the last two months but he's standing outside the box?
The fact they remove the score in the corner on the telly when showing a reply. I really wouldn't get confused and think the thing I just saw but was happening again at 0.3X speed, really.
When VAR is displayed on screen, showing that a goal was onside and despite it being the same feed the commentators see, they have to pretend for a further 10 to 15 seconds that the outcome is still a mystery.
Fans who miss games because "the wife wanted me to take her shopping". Funerals? Weddings? Even birthdays? Sure. But if your commitment to your team is that if you're other half wants you to take them to Iceland you can't say no, then I question you.
When the club's main talisman doesn't take the penalties. Strikers can get so much confidence and momentum from scoring. Even penalties. I don't get why defenders or midfielders take them.
"Oh that'll give the right back the confidence to go on a goal-scoring run" said nobody ever. I don't understand why the benefits of letting your main striker use penalties to gather goal scoring momentum isn't ubiquitous.
"Oh that'll give the right back the confidence to go on a goal-scoring run" said nobody ever. I don't understand why the benefits of letting your main striker use penalties to gather goal scoring momentum isn't ubiquitous.
Players hair styles and tattoos. So many players look like rappers/ convicts these days. Plus that hideous trend of so many brown haired players going hydrogen-peroxid-blonde.
I miss the times when they just looked like actual people.
I miss the times when they just looked like actual people.
I remember at Primary school there was this lad who when challenged/tackled with even the tiniest bit of grit or aggression, yelled out like a baby then rolled on the floor...
...and the way pro footballers act in their 20s/30s isn't too dissimilar. It's pathetic.
When there's a player or person on the bench or in the crowd who has attracted some kind of media attention prior to or during the game. So the camera director feels the need to cut to them at every single opportunity. So instead of watching the game, you get to watch an image of someone else's face, watching the game. Of course they can only do this when nothing that exciting is happening so invariably it wont be a very exciting or excited looking person's face either, and you either won't know/care who they are, or will already know what they look like, so nothing really is gained from this experience.
I don't understand the logic in this. It'd be like watching a film on netflix and during the non action sequences the film cuts away to a video of random people's faces who were watching it in the cinema. Or just turning round and staring intensely at people's faces in the stadium instead of watching the game, and this not being considered something only a weirdo would do.
I don't understand the logic in this. It'd be like watching a film on netflix and during the non action sequences the film cuts away to a video of random people's faces who were watching it in the cinema. Or just turning round and staring intensely at people's faces in the stadium instead of watching the game, and this not being considered something only a weirdo would do.
Having someone lay down behind the wall for free kicks. Absolutely stupid that it was ever done and then suddenly every team started doing it. Players scoring by getting it under the wall is so uncommon ffs.
Not even a goal, does my head in when a broadcaster shows a replay whilst the ball is in-play at all.
Also, on the subject of replays, I have always gotten irrationally annoyed about how broadcasters are always desperate to create a narrative that a team are "putting it" it to United so will show loads of replays of wild shots from distance or crosses that went to nobody to create a "they're piling on the pressure" narrative.
Yes, yes and yes
Well....yeah....but the logic is then that the players in the wall can focus on jumping as high as they possibly can in unison, safe in the knowledge its impossible to go under them.
Not having that player there creates doubt in the minds of the players in the wall. Should I jump? Should I jump a bit? You want them all jumping as high as they can.
VAR
Referees
Feigning injury
Time wasting
The few remaining Rashford fans
Antony
Referees
Feigning injury
Time wasting
The few remaining Rashford fans
Antony
The immediate face of anguish on the most innocuous, nothing fouls. It's a global thing but the worst offenders are obviously South Americans. It has to be trained from a young age for how instinctual it seems to be.
And it's at every level of football now. Watching my brother's amateur match a few weeks ago and there was a guy scrunching his face in agony and curling up into the fetal position when he got little bumps. People were just laughing at him on the sidelines. I don't know how people aren't embarrassed to do it.
And it's at every level of football now. Watching my brother's amateur match a few weeks ago and there was a guy scrunching his face in agony and curling up into the fetal position when he got little bumps. People were just laughing at him on the sidelines. I don't know how people aren't embarrassed to do it.
Free kicks and especially our ones. Always the same, trying to curl it in, usually goes out of play. I'd say we score on average one direct free a season if even that. Don't know how Bruno is still on them.
But why not try something different? One player rolls the ball to another and go for a low drive in, we saw Scholes and Rooney do it a few times. At least even if it's not hit perfectly, it could deflect in, deflect to another player or go out for a corner (don't get me started on them)
I think it's harder to score direct frees these days as keepers are taller and more agile. You have to be very accurate (like a JWP) these days.
But why not try something different? One player rolls the ball to another and go for a low drive in, we saw Scholes and Rooney do it a few times. At least even if it's not hit perfectly, it could deflect in, deflect to another player or go out for a corner (don't get me started on them)
I think it's harder to score direct frees these days as keepers are taller and more agile. You have to be very accurate (like a JWP) these days.
Heard a rumour that it's to do with players who have been on one drug or another on their holidays who want to avoid being caught out in drug tests. Don't know if there's truth in it as I don't get the science but it would explain a lot!
In our uni team we had a guy who did the same, he was a really sound lad until we played football and then he started behaving like that, even our players visibly found it a bit cringe.
When it's goalless and there's 15-20 seconds left of the half and the players are just dicking it around the back.
I have deep hatred for the logic pundits or fans use when things have gone south and they say “If you had offered that at the start of the season” Like how the hell does it makes sense? And why it’s used as an excuse to explain the fall off? Objectives change according to time according to the situation just like the target was different before the season started because the situation was different.
It’s like getting married to a 10 and got cheated by her later on breaking you into pieces but saying “if you had told me before that I would be fecking her I would have bitten your hands off”
It’s like getting married to a 10 and got cheated by her later on breaking you into pieces but saying “if you had told me before that I would be fecking her I would have bitten your hands off”
- Diving. I don't care about context, it's cheating.
- Nonsense about how a tackle that was made in the penalty area would've been a free kick anywhere else.
- Time wasting. It's lame as feck and poor sportsmanship.
- When a player is shit for a year because they aren't putting in the effort, and some genius puts it down to being out of form. As if form is some mystical force that we don't understand, like antimatter.
- When someone inevitably says "that'll give him the confidence he needs" after they score their first goal in months. Why the feck would we want a player whose confidence is so fragile?
- Stupid short corners that never even come close to creating a chance. Just hit the fecking ball into the box and get some tall lads to attack it. Stop over complicating things.
- Egomaniacs who take those daft stop and start penalties. Just run up and blast the fecking thing into the corner.
- football fans who constantly make excuses for being shit, or get offended on behalf of their favourite players whenever criticism is doled out. We're talking about elite sport, not your kids Sunday league team.
- Nonsense about how a tackle that was made in the penalty area would've been a free kick anywhere else.
- Time wasting. It's lame as feck and poor sportsmanship.
- When a player is shit for a year because they aren't putting in the effort, and some genius puts it down to being out of form. As if form is some mystical force that we don't understand, like antimatter.
- When someone inevitably says "that'll give him the confidence he needs" after they score their first goal in months. Why the feck would we want a player whose confidence is so fragile?
- Stupid short corners that never even come close to creating a chance. Just hit the fecking ball into the box and get some tall lads to attack it. Stop over complicating things.
- Egomaniacs who take those daft stop and start penalties. Just run up and blast the fecking thing into the corner.
- football fans who constantly make excuses for being shit, or get offended on behalf of their favourite players whenever criticism is doled out. We're talking about elite sport, not your kids Sunday league team.
That advertising algorithms decide that engaging with football-related content/videos must mean I'm a person to target with a constant barrage of betting adverts, despite never having but on a bet in my life.
"Getting to Wembley" meaning a semi-final.
The term baller. I’m not sure when this became a thing but it boils my piss about as much as the term limbs and them cnuts calling themselves Cityzens.
Fullbacks who can neither defend nor attack.
Boomer fans who say they don't understand why players care so much about their hair while having very strong opinions themselves about players' hairstyles.
When a broadcaster/whoever is in charge switches the camera to a close up shot while a counter attack or something alike is taking place. It is just soo annoying. Same feeling as if somebody walks in your line of sight and just stands there.
It’s pretty daft. Must have seen less than a handful of goals from free kicks going under the wall.
On walls; we played one pres season game ten or so years ago. Maybe in South Africa, maybe the States. The wall of 4-5 people kept bouncing individually out of sequence. It was so effective. Distracting and unpredictable for the taker. Really thought that would just become the new normal. Perhaps it distracted the keeper just as much. Was mighty effective though.
This is atrocious.
Though not as atrocious as Wembley semi finals. That remains one of the biggest feck offs in football. Diminishes the stadium, takes the piss out of The North and all teams playing there. fecks over the fans. Needs to stop.
The sudden overuse of the phrase "sackable offence." Everything is a sackable offence now, offensively so. Buying a player is a sackable offence. Selling a player is a sackable offence. Playing a player is a sackable offence. Being a player is a sackable offence. It's a sackable offence if it's an action which offends you in some insignificant way and is performed by anyone who is in a position of employment from which one could theoretically be sacked. Take your sackable offence and fence it up your sack, you miserable sack of fence.
And another thing - I had to edit that entire rant to change every instance stackable offense to sackable offence because of my phone's predictive corrections. Whoever is responsible should lose their job.
And another thing - I had to edit that entire rant to change every instance stackable offense to sackable offence because of my phone's predictive corrections. Whoever is responsible should lose their job.