Weird feelings of football

[iBoss]

Norwich only sign players from Leeds. Also, all of Norwich's midfielders are the same person.
Every away game in the PL is 'difficult'.
We always beat Arsenal.
Diaby manages two games a season, where he looks like a better Yaya Toure.
Tottenham sign at least one CM every transfer window.
Every Ligue 1 game is either a draw or contains no more than 2 goals, unless PSG are playing.
English teams never win in Russia.
Dortmund have not won a Bundesliga game for two years.
Any team with the word 'Bucharest' in their name, demolish the league they play in.
Hull's defence is only made up of English players.
12PM kick offs in the Championship always end 0-0.

 

[Hoof the ball]

- If he's called Silva, chances are we have had a scouting presence on him or were linked in the media with him
- If an Italian team plays with more than four defenders, they're automatically a Catenaccio side
- James Richardson looks no older than when he presented Football Italia in '95

 

[marukomu]

Portsmouth don't play football anymore.

 

[Wonder Pigeon]

Any team with the word 'Bucharest' in their name, demolish the league they play in.

There's only one league a team with the word 'Bucharest' in the name is going to be playing in Boss.

 

[iBoss]

There's only one league a team with the word 'Bucharest' in the name is going to be playing in Boss.

Of course.

It's just that when I'm betting I look for 'Bucharest' and think 'win'. I think there are three or four of them in the Romanian league. I think it's Steaua that demolish the league anyway.

 

[BigDunc9]

Cavani is shit every time i watch him yet he is obviously a fantastic player going off his goal record and reputation.

 

[shamans]

Almost every press conference, every new player signing or every reaction to every event is the same yet generate the same reaction.

 

[Sam]

Cavani is shit every time i watch him yet he is obviously a fantastic player going off his goal record and reputation.

This, absolutely this. Same goes for Ibra.

 

[Winrar]

Deportivo gets promoted/relegated every other year.

Mainz was relegated last season.

 

[fontaine]

Every "star" that goes to the MLS is always on loan some place else

 

[The Mitcher]

Norwich only sign players from Leeds. Also, all of Norwich's midfielders are the same person.
Every away game in the PL is 'difficult'.
We always beat Arsenal.
Diaby manages two games a season, where he looks like a better Yaya Toure.
Tottenham sign at least one CM every transfer window.
Every Ligue 1 game is either a draw or contains no more than 2 goals, unless PSG are playing.
English teams never win in Russia.
Dortmund have not won a Bundesliga game for two years.
Any team with the word 'Bucharest' in their name, demolish the league they play in.
Hull's defence is only made up of English players.
12PM kick offs in the Championship always end 0-0.

McShane is Irish!

 

[Big Ben Foster]

Every time the Caf melts down in reaction to lineups we go on to win comfortably.
On the other hand, whenever lineups are announced and the reaction is universally positive, we end up playing like shit and losing.

 

[Getsme]

McShane is Irish!

Yeah, that's why it's a weird feeling.

 

[NoPace]

Camera angle determines how wide the pitch is, which in turn determines if the team with more of the ball will have space to create chances or not.

 

[PickledRed]

Older player does something well: "showing his experience there"
Older player does something poorly: "years are catching up on him"
Younger player does something well: "the exuberance of youth"
Younger player does something poorly: "showing his inexperience there"

Moral of the tale: pundits use simplistic logic to explain stuff

 

[Mali_Zeus]

Older player does something well: "showing his experience there"
Older player does something poorly: "years are catching up on him"
Younger player does something well: "the exuberance of youth"
Younger player does something poorly: "showing his inexperience there"

Moral of the tale: pundits use simplistic logic to explain stuff

That reminds me.

There's a pundit here in Croatia who is absoultely awful and everybody wonders how is he still a football pundit. With all the other nonsense he says whatever happens in every game that's a typical for that and that player or that and that team.
For instance:
"Rooney with a long pass, that's typical for him."
"Young with an absolute screamer of goal. That's so typical for him.
"Di Maria's short corner, that's a typical Di Maria short coner."
"Ghana attacking now, that's what they typically do."
"Germany defending as they typically do."




On topic - Football has finally clicked in America and the Americans have fnally embraced football and are crazy about it.
-I've been hearing this for about 20 years.

 

[Cooksen]

Tim Cahill never kicks the ball, only heads it.

 

[BigDunc9]

Sylvan Distin slices every clearance he ever attempts.

 

[Welsh Wonder]

Tomasz Kuszczak came out of the womb after a heavy first touch.

 

[Red Stone]

Ginger players are either world beaters or pure shit.

Zbigniew Boniek
Matthias Sammer
Paul Scholes

Paul McShane
Steve Sidwell

 

[MTR]

Question "Can he play in midfield two"? is no longer important. Now we have "Can he play in defence three"?

 

[Big Ben Foster]

Fitness tests are always taken late.

 

[Amethyst]

Fitness tests are always taken late.

Evans, Smalling and Jones have never been fit all at the same time.
Rosicky has been 33 for the last five years.
Mignolet has never caught a cross or shot, he can only push it away.

 

[marukomu]

Juan Mata is part of every potential future transfer.

 

[Big Ben Foster]

Swap deals make up 5% of all transfers and 95% of all transfer rumors.

 

[Needham]

No one will ever be as good as Pele or Maradona even when they patently are.

Every time you watch a team from the north east play you expect them to lose.

No referee has apparently ever been racist.

 

[matherto]

Messi never dives even though he very obviously does.

 

[Piratesoup]

Italian teams never have more than 2000 people in attendance when playing in the Europaleague.

 

[Amethyst]

About 1/3rd of Chelsea's transfers actually end up having a career there. The rest either play one season and are sold, or spend about 5 years out on loan before also being sold.

No English clubs have a running track around the pitch.

People never mention Kaka being a massive disappointment at Madrid, even after he was signed for about £60m.

 

[matherto]

Zenit always make it out of the group stages of the CL despite being utterly terrible whenever they play.

 

[BigDunc9]

When Ronaldo and Messi scuff, mishit or generally have a bad shot it still always goes in.

 

[Wonder Pigeon]

About 1/3rd of Chelsea's transfers actually end up having a career there. The rest either play one season and are sold, or spend about 5 years out on loan before also being sold.

No English clubs have a running track around the pitch.

People never mention Kaka being a massive disappointment at Madrid, even after he was signed for about £60m.

Finding out that Matic was already at Chelsea once already was a mind-blower.

 

[rcoobc]

So many of these are true

 

[Paolo Di Canio]

A manager has never missed a competitive match from being ill

Kaka in his pomp was not actually that fast and when he went on runs through the middle seemed to be going slow but nobody could catch him

Vincent Kompany/Steven Gerrard always returned from injuries to play United no matter how bad it was, Vidic or Van Persie would always get injured before the derby

 

[Aboutreika18]

Lahm's only ever scored one goal in his career, the opening goal of the 2006 World Cup.

 

[gormless]

If United were losing to another top 4 team, Vidic would get sent off in the second half

 

[Cockney-Red]

Tim Cahill never kicks the ball, only heads it.

Or volleys it.

 

[Americano]

"Winning" today. I'll take the points but that was a shit sandwich.

 

[Cockney-Red]

Shakhtar Donetsk are a Ukrainian team who play in the Champions League every season and always get knocked out in the group stages.

Their starting eleven always consists of 6 unknown black Brazilian guys and 5 random Ukrainians.

At the end of every season, one of those unknown black Brazilian players will suddenly become rated as 'World Class' and will make an overpriced 28 million pound move to one of the sugar daddy clubs; like Man City, Chelsea or PSG etc.

 

[fontaine]

Shakhtar Donetsk are a Ukrainian team who play in the Champions League every season and always get knocked out in the group stages.

Their starting eleven always consists of 6 unknown black Brazilian guys and 5 random Ukrainians.

At the end of every season, one of those unknown black Brazilian players will suddenly become rated as 'World Class' and will make an overpriced 28 million pound move to one of the sugar daddy clubs; like Man City, Chelsea or PSG etc.

they get out of group stages a lot of times