Alexis Sanchez | Done deal

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Rado_N

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Oh god not the pre or post tax debate.

Wages figures quoted in England are always before tax, not net.

They're also almost always wrong.
 

Canagel

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Can somebody summarise today's events so far? I've been out and about today and didn't have time to check my phone.
 

charlie9882

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If they got the pre/post tax bit wrong. 270k is probably about right. Not exactly massive wages in todays market considering Rooney was on more than that 5 years ago. I think 250-300k is probably the average for top players (except Madrid & Barca).
City had agreed £275k p/w before tax with him - given United have allegedly blown City out of the water financially, it's going to be a fair chunk over this figure. Maybe not as extreme as Matt Law is suggesting, but it's easily going to be over £300k before tax.
 

Trizy

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Can somebody summarise today's events so far? I've been out and about today and didn't have time to check my phone.
9am - Nothing
10am - Nothing
11am - Nothing
12am - Chile news report lost his shit and went full muppet
1pm - Nothing
2pm - Eboue
 

GM K

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This has been a frustrating wait.

But it has provided its own benefits. For example, now I can spot 'Fake News' or news designed to feed muppets like me more easily. Now I can sniff them out expertly. The most brilliant of such is the one that allows the poster or 'journalist' to be able to easily say 'I said it will happen' and 'I said it might not happen' in the same breath with absolutely no fear of being accused of lieing. That's absolutely brilliant.

When you see:

'Sanchez to United Deal Sealed but Mikhitaryan to Determine'. The guy can say 'I said it' whether the deal is closed or not. How can you beat such brilliance?

What you want to look out for is the word 'BUT'. E.G again:

'Done Deal! Mikhitaryan agrees to Arsenal move but wage details still uncleared'

'Alexis Sanchez 'agrees four-year deal worth £14million with Manchester United' - but move hinges on Henrikh Mkhitaryan'


'West Ham braced for Carroll bid after Chelsea open talks over move for striker but Moyes admits he’s in the dark'.


At times, the 'but' is veiled so you need to look carefully. E,g.

'It's Still On - At a Price'

The genius here is to use '-' to cover the word 'but'.

It's not just 'but' that is used brilliantly. You want to look out for phrases like 'closes in on', 'reported to be', 'Set to', 'Open to' etc.

What runs through those? Same thing: if it happens, the poster will claim he said it. If it does not happen, the poster will say he said. Genius.

So dear fellow muppets, use these insights to survive the next few days. They will help you spot the baits from afar and save you from lost time, heart aches, pains, high blood pressure and losing your nails.
 

Yagami

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When I used to watch Revista de La Liga on Sky Sports a few years ago I always thought Balague came across quite well. Shame he's a neanderthal.
 

SteveJ

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Can somebody summarise today's events so far?
Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signifying nothing.
 

MDFC Manager

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So let's get the process of a transfer as reported by the media / redcafe nailed down here shall we

1. United may be interested in a player, the redcafe thread about that player from 2013 is bumped (poster is commended for not starting a new thread)

2. Player issues a 'come and get me' plea according to tabloid websites with many many hypnotic animated ads on their homepages - on redcafe the posts about masturbating begin - people presume they are speaking metaphorically - but perhaps not...

3. A respected journalist mouthpiece of another club reports that the player is also of interest to other domestic clubs - cocks (both metaphorical and real) are rapidly put away

4. Twitter 'personality' with an amusing twitter name, but who has no links to united or indeed anything other than his mum's umbilical chord at birth, reports that United have begun to prepare a bid - redcafe thread grows 100 pages in less than 24 hours; mainly with posts expressing disbelief in how fast the thread has grown given the lack of genuine news.

5. Claims on twitter emerge that player will now snub united in favour of a move to large Euopean rivals - many 'I told you so' posts appear in thread; several posters are referred to health professionals for treatment

6. Rumours player snub is due to manager and style of fooball - backed up by tweets from people with the dreaded blue ticks next to their names. A poster who doesn't like Jose and never did breaks his wrists while attempting to violently type up a post about how much he doesn't like Jose

7. It's now being reported as fact that actually the player prefers money over anything else and so Oil rich, sugar-daddy club United may be his preferred destination afterall

8. United move from preparing a bid to being about to 'launch' a bid - 'that' picture of Ed Woodward pointing is posted on redcafe

9. A full day passes without any united bid being launched at all (presumably due to engineering problems on the launch-pad)

10. Dramatic breaking news - different domestic rival now enters the race - oh feck it's the dreaded Liverpool link - hell breaks lose on redcafe until someone reminds everyone they (Liverpool) haven't won the league in nearly 27 (t-w-e-n-t-y s-e-v-e-n) years. This point has no relevance to, or bearing on, the potential transfer, but it's enough of a distraction to cool tensions momentarily

11. The Manager of a domestic rival admits in a press conference that they have no knowledge about their club being in the race at all

12. Several news outlets pretend they didn't hear or read the manager's quotes and continue to push the 'transfer hijack angle' because, well, why not?

13. It's too much for some Caftards; they want off this train wreck of a transfer saga, but somehow it's as if their fingers are stuck on F5

14 BOOM Player moves to City (the world ends - MaxiPaxi survives but lives out a reclusive existence contemplating the 1000 better ways he/she could have spent the time wasted posting 350 times in a transfer thread)
At least you got 13/14 right.
 

#07

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Did you not see his poll? He hates us so much/loves pep so much he genuinely created this. Remember he's a grown man when you read it.

Its actually getting a bit sad isn't it? Genuinely worried about what Guillem might do if we actually get this signing over the line. Wouldn't be surprised to see him standing outside of Carrington with a box of Estrellas screaming 'SANCHEZ!!!!!!!!'
 

ThatsGreat

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Yeah, fair enough - at this point in time you can't view their values like-for-like due to the differences in their contractual positions and, to be fair, Mkhi may well be more suited to Arsenal's style of play. However, if I was an Arsenal fan I would still be aggrieved that the club / Wenger had let it get to this position where they are exchanging a truly world class player for a player who has had one really good season and failed to prove himself in the PL to date
Sanchez was never going to extend for us unless we won a title. The writing was on the wall since we messed up the Leicester season. Getting a player who might work well with PEA is the best of a bad situation. This deal is better than zero in the summer. I supported the boards decision to hang on to him last summer with the hope that Sanchez-Ozil-Laca can get us close to the title. But now that that's not happening it's sensible to cut our losses.
 

Classical Mechanic

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Di Marzio reported Sanchez's agreement with City at £13m net, with a £30m bonus if he signed in the summer and a £15m bonus if he signed in this window.

If you assume that Di Marzio got net and gross mixed up, then if Sanchez signed in the summer he would effectively be earning the £400k a week gross he has been rumoured to be after since the talk of him leaving Arsenal started.

My guess is that he will get around £400k a week from us all told without having to wait until summer to escape from Arsenal.
 

Turnip

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Agreed. But the bold part is actually true for this transfer as well. Sure it has stretched slightly since the news first broke, but that doesn't mean that this potential transfer didn't happen out of the blue.
True to be fair, it was fully expected to be Man City originally. I guess we'll have to see how long it goes on. I reckon if it's not sorted by the beginning of next week or we've seen some form of actual evidence other than Tweets it's not gonna happen. I mean it still makes sense for all parties involved, which is the biggest thing that's keeping my hopes up, but that isn't always enough.
 

MDFC Manager

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Easier than trying to spell his name I guess...you got it wrong yourself! :D
Fair point :nervous::D

Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury
Signifying nothing.
Ffs:lol:
 

SATA

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The Pogba transfer was dragged for at least two months and this has been barely been a week. If both players are to be registered for the weekend PL games, it has to be done by Friday. So expect something very soon i say
 

Ødegaard

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See way to many numbers thrown out without people showing their math so others can correct or double-check it.

14 000 000 (year) / 52 (weeks in a year) = 269 230~ per week
Reported to be pre-tax, so the following is really not needed:

If it were to be post-tax we'd be talking:
269 230 * 1,45 (45% top tax) = 390 383~ per week
Or 390 383 * 52 = 20 300 000~ yearly
Source for tax rates
 

ChaddyP

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The Pogba transfer was dragged for at least two months and this has been barely been a week. If both players are to be registered for the weekend PL games, it has to be done by Friday. So expect something very soon i say
These muppets no nothing about a saga. This has been cut and dry from day 2.

Imagine when we had to stalk chef and barber IG pages to get news! And read cryptic messages and pictures of a fat man in red shorts. Or watch award shows and wonder of the colour of his outfit meant anything.

Imagine having to suffer through with fecking eshanul.


This isn't even a saga... It's been pretty straightforward with one hick up
 

MadMike

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Oh god not the pre or post tax debate.

Wages figures quoted in England are always before tax, not net.

They're also almost always wrong.
The maths in that article are a shambles.

£14m per year is £270k pw which sounds about right and matches the £90m total package mentioned (£55m salary, £30m value, £5m agent). If that is pre-tax as they claim the the total cost of the package is £145m which is obviously bollocks.

Like you said prices in England are always pre-tax and hardly anyone outside of the parties involved really knows how the contract is structured in terms of bonuses, image rights etc. We still have this antiquated view of reported salary which is almost always wrong and involves a shit on of hearsay. Depending on whether it lumps all clauses together or it reports only the base salary it can appear to be either very low or exorbitantly high to the uninformed parties (us).
 

londonredmaniac

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Its actually getting a bit sad isn't it? Genuinely worried about what Guillem might do if we actually get this signing over the line. Wouldn't be surprised to see him standing outside of Carrington with a box of Estrellas screaming 'SANCHEZ!!!!!!!!'
:lol::lol:
 

Tom Van Persie

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They forgot to include the part that C Ronaldo will also join. But in general, accounts that refer to stories published by other media has probably been posted here before accounts like utreport etc. pick them up.
I've removed it didn't see the [la cuarta]
 

SATA

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These muppets no nothing about a saga. This has been cut and dry from day 2.

Imagine when we had to stalk chef and barber IG pages to get news! And read cryptic messages and pictures of a fat man in red shorts. Or watch award shows and wonder of the colour of his outfit meant anything.

Imagine having to suffer through with fecking eshanul.


This isn't even a saga... It's been pretty straightforward with one hick up
Oh yeah i remember those, and eshanul adamant and fearing of Zidane taking away Pogba

And stalking Pogba when he was in LA on hoildays and playing basketball. Fun times :lol:
 

Hephaestus

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Can someone explain this to me please? I don't remember anything about RVP contract
I think that person is claiming that Van Persie's performances dropped off after two seasons at which point his contract/wages became an issue and we had to sell him cheaply just to get rid of him. So he's claiming Sanchez will do the same, be great for a couple of years and then become a liability. Personally, doubt it as Sanchez doesn't have the same injury history and even if he does drop off, Van Persie was key in a title win. Not exactly a hardship.
 
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The No.10!

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Rooney's ball and van Persie's volley.
True to be fair, it was fully expected to be Man City originally. I guess we'll have to see how long it goes on. I reckon if it's not sorted by the beginning of next week or we've seen some form of actual evidence other than Tweets it's not gonna happen. I mean it still makes sense for all parties involved, which is the biggest thing that's keeping my hopes up, but that isn't always enough.
Yes, but again, what other evidence can we get apart from tweets? Even if you're referring to images of players getting medicals done et al, those will be posted on twitter! Just the day and age we are living in. ;)

I'm more than hoping though. I really think this will be finalized!
 

Klopp_De_Klown

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"Win-win deal for MUFC/AFC" - not sure that Arsenal fans will view it like that
You may be correct about the fans but he will suit arsenal much more than us and Wenger will arm around the shoulder him. Something Jose won't. Them same fans will be singing his name his name once he slots in. You know and seen the impact he had here. He's no bad player but has lost his form with us and it's not the best environment to get it back, at United. He's clearly nowhere near as strong mentally as Fellaini. Who got even worse stick form us and we must give some respect how he bounced back form it. He was actually missed when injured and Pogs out. We can not blame Mkhi for who he is.

Do not forget he was the actual best player in the Europa last year. If we are honest we know it was not Pogba but we say nothing because we need Pogs to succeed at all costs and go on to be what he threatens to be, the best midfielder in the world.

If I was talking to the goonies in a pub or whatever I'd lay it on thick. But to my arsenal mates I'd much more complementary of Mkhi
 
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