Dele Alli | Overlap Interview with Neville opens up on childhood trauma and mental health issues

Rocksy

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So let me get this straight. When he was at the top of his game scoring for fun and playing great football he had none of these issues. But then his form drops massively he can't pass the ball to save his life he suddenly has mental problems?
Everyone suffers one way or another but you don't go public with it do you when you're shit at your job do you?
GifLord. Next time, just post the exact same thing as everyone else! :lol:
 

Solius

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If that’s what hap


GifLord. Next time, just post the exact same thing as everyone else! :lol:
Are you implying he's just getting stick because he doesn't agree with the consensus of most on here? His arguments are flawed.
 

sepulturite

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I find it weird how some of you are accepting this. The guy signed a 6year record deal with Spurs in 2018 worth over 150k and did feck all to justify it.
But because he had drug poblems because of apparent' Mental Issues' you're all 'Oh it's ok we forgive you'
He said he couldn't sleep cause of adrenalin? But he was partying every day like a madman, fecking women - even posted a fricking sextape...
If you train properly you will be tired at the end of the day so this bs about adrenalin i don't believe one bit.
You really a shocking poster than should be banned for the utter crap you come out with :houllier:
 

Rocksy

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I really want to give you the benefit of the doubt that you cannot be this ignorant.
Isn’t this just really sanctimonious? If he is ignorant (or not) what difference does it make to your life?
 

Rockets Redglare

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So let me get this straight. When he was at the top of his game scoring for fun and playing great football he had none of these issues. But then his form drops massively he can't pass the ball to save his life he suddenly has mental problems?
Everyone suffers one way or another but you don't go public with it do you when you're shit at your job ?
Trauma and mental health issues aren’t linear you fecking pleb.
It’s not as simple as oh you used to be able to cope, why can’t you anymore?
 

ScholesyTheWise

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To me it just feels like something you'd read from a 13 year old Andrew Tate fan.

"Got depression? Get in the gym more you pussy!"
As someone who's battled with depression his entire life,
if we take the "got depression? Go to the gym" statement without the 'pussy' part,
I can see why people will think it's the way to go and find it bizarre that people sit at home, claim to have mental issues,
and "not do anything about it" i.e. going to the gym.

I believe that there are tons of people- some might be Tate followers, I don't know-
that think of a very tough time they might have faced themselves sometimes during life,

and then apply whatever worked for them as they got better to people with distinctive mental illnesses, expecting them to do, be and feel the same as a result.

I don't think it's ill-intended.

Just really really ill-informed.

I wish people could be ""fixed"" from being sexually abused at a young age by going to the gym regularly.
Imagine that.
 

Solius

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Isn’t this just really sanctimonious? If he is ignorant (or not) what difference does it make to your life?
I'm a mod on the forum and responsible for getting rid of knobheads and making it a better place for everyone.
 

Rocksy

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Are you implying he's just getting stick because he doesn't agree with the consensus of most on here? His arguments are flawed.
Not at all. I’m just wondering why everyone is going mental because someone has a “shit take”.
 

Solius

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Not at all. I’m just wondering why everyone is going mental because someone has a “shit take”.
It's not his first, and it's also just baffling in age where everyone is a lot more informed about mental health and how trauma can manifest in adult life.
 

SilentWitness

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So let me get this straight. When he was at the top of his game scoring for fun and playing great football he had none of these issues. But then his form drops massively he can't pass the ball to save his life he suddenly has mental problems?
Everyone suffers one way or another but you don't go public with it do you when you're shit at your job ?
You just don’t understand mental health, which is fine, not everyone does, but to have a brazen ignorance on a subject and still going in guns blazing when people are trying to be reasonable with you is pretty incredible. Mental health isn’t simply a case of having trauma so you are sad or a case of having happiness so you’re happy. It’s far more complex and can go hand in hand. It would not be surprising if one way Dele tried to combat the trauma was with football and putting all his energy and time and passion into it which led him to do incredible things fuelled by the adrenaline. It is also not surprising that when he hit a blip in form the childhood trauma came flooding back and they both merged into a severe mental health crisis for him that is going to still challenge him for the rest of his life.
 

bosnian_red

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Just goes to show how rough it is at the top level mentally. Things can spiral quickly when you lose some form and start getting abused online by no life idiots. Always useful to remember that they are just people, getting paid a good amount doesn't change that and doesn't eliminate the fact that we all still go through our own mental health issues and had our own traumas to deal with in the past.
 

OverratedOpinion

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I can see why people will think it's the way to go and find it bizarre that people sit at home, claim to have mental issues,
and "not do anything about it" i.e. going to the gym.
I just think it is generally ignorant to try and tell anyone how to deal with mental health issues unless you are qualified to do so and have had adequate time with the person to assess their needs.

Getting physically healthier is pretty much always a good thing but the kids online who say that tend to have pretty dangerous beliefs about mental health and depression "not being real" if you dig a little deeper.
 

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It really sounds like he had a hard life so I wish him all the best footballing-wise, but even if it doesn't work out then he can still be proud to have done better than most people professionally and made a fair chunk of change through it.

I mean this in a nice way too. These childhood issues can really feck people up and, sadly, not everybody can find a way to channel their demons through sport.
 

golden_blunder

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You're completely ignoring the circumstances in his upbringing that have led him down a dark path.

His mom was an alcoholic. He was sexually abused at 6 years old. Sent to Africa to learn discipline at 7. Got into drug dealing 8. Hung off a bridge at 11. Adopted at 12.

The man is deeply traumatised. It shouldn't be that difficult to understand why he has made some stupid choices.
Jesus. Didn’t know all that about him. That would test even the strongest
 

bosnian_red

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So let me get this straight. When he was at the top of his game scoring for fun and playing great football he had none of these issues. But then his form drops massively he can't pass the ball to save his life he suddenly has mental problems?
Everyone suffers one way or another but you don't go public with it do you when you're shit at your job ?
Going public with it from his position can be a motivational story, can inspire others, but also send a message to other idiots who can't get their heads out of their ass and think it's ok to abuse professionals because they had a bad day kicking a ball because "oh you get paid enough, deal with it"... Money doesn't change shit. Mental health is mental health, depression is real, the pressures at that level are enormous and things can spiral very quickly and very dangerously.
 

Solius

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Going public with it from his position can be a motivational story, can inspire others, but also send a message to other idiots who can't get their heads out of their ass and think it's ok to abuse professionals because they had a bad day kicking a ball.
Unfortunately I don't think it will change a thing for people already in that mindset.
 

cesc's_mullet

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Children that grow up in that kind of environment carry that trauma with them forever. Even if they are able to break the cycle of abuse they still have to battle with the resulting mental health issues.
 

theballisround

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As one that had a similar childhood, many of you have no fecking idea how it feels and how the "down" days are, no matter you are a football player, a CEO or whatever.

There is a constant feel of rejection towards yourself when you feel you are not good enough. We try our best to replace our past with our work and when work feels you're not good enough, the brain goes back to the shit period.

Anyone talking about the subject without going through it and getting out at least half normal should fecking keep their thoughts for themselves.

But hey, everyone has a fecking opinion these days and needs to say it cause it takes a thought of their little brain when words come out of their mouth.

I struggled for years to get the courage to get help, just imagine how much guts a footbal player needs to have to do it and also tell the story. If I had seen such a thing when I was 15 I would have asked for help earlier so big big props to him.
 

Rocksy

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It's not his first, and it's also just baffling in age where everyone is a lot more informed about mental health and how trauma can manifest in adult life.
I’ve got depression, OCD and anxiety. On plenty of the Sertraline myself, the highest dose, but so what? If Dele got abused then that’s terrible, but what does it matter whether GifLord ofRedcafe has Solius’s required level of empathy for Dele, me or anyone else?
 

Edwards6

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So let me get this straight. When he was at the top of his game scoring for fun and playing great football he had none of these issues. But then his form drops massively he can't pass the ball to save his life he suddenly has mental problems?
Everyone suffers one way or another but you don't go public with it do you when you're shit at your job ?
Or maybe his mental health problems caused the dip in form. Just because he was dealing with his trauma before it doesn't mean that will always be the case it's an ongoing battle. It's horrific what he went through as a child and I applaud him for being brave enough to speak out about it.
Severe lack of empathy if you don't feel for him after that interview
 

Pogue Mahone

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Trauma and mental health issues aren’t linear you fecking pleb.
It’s not as simple as oh you used to be able to cope, why can’t you anymore?
Yup. When everything in your life is going well (e.g. when he first burst on the scene at Spurs) then he's obviously much less likely to have any mental health issues. It's when he experiences the sort of challenges that every pro goes through eventually (injury, loss of form, adapting to new team/manager etc) he won't have the same mental durability as someone who's had a more stable upbringing. Hence it can take a while for all that vulnerability to reveal itself.
 

Zebs

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I’ve got depression, OCD and anxiety. On plenty of the Sertraline myself, the highest dose, but so what? If Dele got abused then that’s terrible, but what does it matter whether GifLord ofRedcafe has Solius’s required level of empathy for Dele, me or anyone else?
Why join a discussion forum? What does anyone's opinion on anything matter?
 

Pogue Mahone

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I’ve got depression, OCD and anxiety. On plenty of the Sertraline myself, the highest dose, but so what? If Dele got abused then that’s terrible, but what does it matter whether GifLord ofRedcafe has Solius’s required level of empathy for Dele, me or anyone else?
It doesn't matter but if he shares his terrible takes he'll be called out on them. The more terrible the take, the more people are likely to respond. Why does this seem to bother you?
 

Solius

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I’ve got depression, OCD and anxiety. On plenty of the Sertraline myself, the highest dose, but so what? If Dele got abused then that’s terrible, but what does it matter whether GifLord ofRedcafe has Solius’s required level of empathy for Dele, me or anyone else?
It's not a required level of empathy, it's more the complete lack of it.

Also, again I'm a mod. We help make the forum a more enjoyable place and some (possibly like yourself) wouldn't appreciate people shitting on something with these issues and insinuating they're lying or only doing it because they're in bad form.

I hope you are doing ok with your issues too mate.
 

Chief123

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I find it weird how some of you are accepting this. The guy signed a 6year record deal with Spurs in 2018 worth over 150k and did feck all to justify it.
But because he had drug poblems because of apparent' Mental Issues' you're all 'Oh it's ok we forgive you'
He said he couldn't sleep cause of adrenalin? But he was partying every day like a madman, fecking women - even posted a fricking sextape...
If you train properly you will be tired at the end of the day so this bs about adrenalin i don't believe one bit.
What a shocking post.

Regardless of how he came across or hid it, or chose to reveal it during his difficult period…being sexually abused as a child is horrific and difficult to deal with in any circumstance. No contract or lifestyle can erase that trauma from your memory.
 

MUFC OK

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Did you watch the video? Do you understand why he may have been doing these self-destructive things?
Absolutely this. When people do that they are often self-medicating or running from something.
 

SilentWitness

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perhaps you can handle it but there may be others with mental health issues that won’t be able to deal with that level of ignorance. it is a discussion forum and is about creating a positive community and about creating positive discussion. If people are posting ignorant takes then it’s our responsibility as mods to address that but also as fellow posters to engage with it.
I’ve got depression, OCD and anxiety. On plenty of the Sertraline myself, the highest dose, but so what? If Dele got abused then that’s terrible, but what does it matter whether GifLord ofRedcafe has Solius’s required level of empathy for Dele, me or anyone else?
 

Rocksy

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Why join a discussion forum? What does anyone's opinion on anything matter?
To read or give shit/good takes without calling for bans and whatever.
 

Solius

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To read or give shit/good takes without calling for bans and whatever.
Using that logic there should be no mods and we should just let anyone on here? Racists, sexists, etc..?
 

WeePat

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I’ve got depression, OCD and anxiety. On plenty of the Sertraline myself, the highest dose, but so what? If Dele got abused then that’s terrible, but what does it matter whether GifLord ofRedcafe has Solius’s required level of empathy for Dele, me or anyone else?
Come on, it's a forum. You post stupid shit, people will correct you. This may feel like a pile on but posts only really get 10 replies at once when they post some egregious shit. He said he watched the entire interview, which makes his posts all the more bizarre because you would think most people would be empathetic to someone who is telling the world he was molested at 6 years old and coerced into dealing drugs at 8 years old.
 

Vidyoyo

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I’ve got depression, OCD and anxiety. On plenty of the Sertraline myself, the highest dose, but so what? If Dele got abused then that’s terrible, but what does it matter whether GifLord ofRedcafe has Solius’s required level of empathy for Dele, me or anyone else?
Fair point. It doesn't matter and the sensible thing for us would have been to put GIFLord on ignore. He's shown himself up numerous times for this kind of thing in the past.

I get why people react though as what he said heightens emotions, particularly for those who've been through adverse situations themselves. It depends on how we want to channel that energy, I suppose.

Edit - I haven't put him on ignore because his GIFs are sadly too good.
 

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To be honest, I find the decision to put “girl who cheated on you several times” alongside serial killers the most disturbing thing in that post.
Agree, and am concerned about that poster's real life interactions with people, how he treats others and how he responds to any struggles..
 

KiD MoYeS

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Full credit to Dele. This has obviously been eaten him up for a long time and to go public would not have been easy. For all the abuse he has got for losing form, myself included probably, and to think he had all this going on internally.
 

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Alli got molested as a kid.

Giflord - oh snap out of it, he was fine when he was banging goals and girls. Probaly made that up. Go to the gym, play football and you'll be fine.

I've seen some crap posts but even by his standard it's shocking.
 
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Rocksy

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Using that logic there should be no mods and we should just let anyone on here? Racists, sexists, etc..?
Not really. Having a shit/insensitive take on something topical is not the same as racially abusing someone, is it? Anyway I’m probably derailing the thread here, and my holiday with the Mrs. I’ll leave it there for me. Feel free to have a do back if you want but I’d better be off :lol:
 

OverratedOpinion

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God bless his adoptive parents by the way. I imagine they must be very proud, it's easy to forget that whilst a lot of people might say he failed he actually got to the very top of his chosen profession.
 

hodgey123

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Horrible that he said he felt coerced into going public with it because the tabloids had got wind of his trip to rehab. With everything else that has been going on this past week, surely it is time we properly regulated this terrible industry?