Neymar

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Rich_H_1989

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Guys this is literally starting to get embarrassing now.

It's like when you'd try to get with that girl at your college, who was always way out of your league, absoultely incredibly good looking and a great personality to go with it. And then for some reason she starts acting friendly towards you. You at first talk a bit in Sociology where you sit next to her and suddenly you're sending her a few texts. You think for some reason, who knows why looking back, but you think she actually might be interested. She invites you to go back to her house one day and she says she really likes you, but she's into some weird stuff. You start to get hopeful hoping she might actually like you and are interested in the stuff she's going to do. Next second she's blindfolding you and she starts to lick your balls. Next second you hear a lad laughing and it's her fecking built as feck boyfriend with a camera in his hand. You look down and see it's not her but her dog which is licking your balls, and fecking Mike has got it all on video. She comes out saying, "Sorry, it was just too funny" and you run away with tears streaming down your face. She ends up getting with Michael and they have a great life while you're known as "The Dog Whisperer" for the rest of your life.
I thought this was brilliant but mate what on earth! The way you tell this story makes me think this is from experience! :D

Think we just have to take this rumour the way most of us have... With a smile and a joke and nothing more. Maybe there was a conversation. Maybe Woodward chanced his arm? Doubt it but maybe. It was never going to happen and we all knew it.
 

Di Maria's angel

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Guys this is literally starting to get embarrassing now.

It's like when you'd try to get with that girl at your college, who was always way out of your league, absoultely incredibly good looking and a great personality to go with it. And then for some reason she starts acting friendly towards you. You at first talk a bit in Sociology where you sit next to her and suddenly you're sending her a few texts. You think for some reason, who knows why looking back, but you think she actually might be interested. She invites you to go back to her house one day and she says she really likes you, but she's into some weird stuff. You start to get hopeful hoping she might actually like you and are interested in the stuff she's going to do. Next second she's blindfolding you and she starts to lick your balls. Next second you hear a lad laughing and it's her fecking built as feck boyfriend with a camera in his hand. You look down and see it's not her but her dog which is licking your balls, and fecking Mike has got it all on video. She comes out saying, "Sorry, it was just too funny" and you run away with tears streaming down your face. She ends up getting with Michael and they have a great life while you're known as "The Dog Whisperer" for the rest of your life.
Smalling?
 

Roman Bellic

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EXCLUSIVE: The truth behind the Neymar and Manchester United transfer story
In his debut blog for Yahoo Sport, Spanish football expert Guillem Balagué looks behind the scenes at the real reasons behind the biggest transfer rumour of the summer.
By Guillem Balagué
With the season barely started, the latest potboiler to emanate from the Camp Nou in Barcelona is underway, namely the contract renewals – or otherwise – of its most talented stars Lionel Messi and Neymar, whose contracts finish in three years time.

Sometime between now and 2018, Barcelona are going to be moving heaven and earth to make sure they get the signatures of both players on contract extensions. Strap yourselves in, it’s going to be a long journey.

This Neymar to United story (and in the future, to City, PSG, and Chelsea) will run and run not least because for those clubs with money, by which I mean REAL money, (Real Madrid, PSG, Chelsea, Manchester City and Manchester United), if there was the slightest chance of signing either of the two players, but particularly Neymar bearing in mind he is only 23-years-old, then they would snap it up in a heartbeat.

Not surprisingly therefore, Neymar’s people have already fired the first shots across the Barcelona bows helping offer to media the ‘revelation’ that Manchester United are interested in the player -maybe not for this summer though, or so the stories say. Why do they come out now?
It is all nonsense of course and certainly something that will have come as a bit of a surprise to United. Ed Woodward was in Barcelona for a short, slightly bizarre meeting a week ago, the main purpose of which seemed to be to express some interest in Pedro, but not with much enthusiasm. Perhaps he was trying to get the player’s price reduced or at least delay payment. It’s fair to assume that had they really wanted the player, a little more enthusiasm would not have gone amiss.

In the end they offered 28 plus two million, so when Chelsea came in and offered the full amount (27 plus 3), Pedro was left in no doubt just where he would be more appreciated.

What is certain however is that the name of Neymar was never mentioned during Mr Woodward’s brief stopover in the Catalan capital, although I’m reliably informed he did enjoy a tour of the Barcelona museum afterwards!

So, where do the Neymar stories come from?

Within the next few hours, if it hasn’t appeared already, expect to see splash headlines appearing in the Brazilian paper El Globo revealing exclusively that Neymar will fulfil a lifetime’s ambition by playing in the Premier League if he decides to join Manchester United who will offer a jaw-dropping 190 million euros for him. That is a leak from the Neymar family, who looks after his interests.


What we are seeing now is the first episode of what is going to be a long and drawn out saga because what they have at the moment is that most valuable of commodities – time. Barcelona will want to put the matter to bed as soon as possible. Neymar’s people on the other hand will be looking to take it to the wire because the closer the player comes to the end of his deal, the more nervous the club will get about the potential threat of losing one of its major assets.

It’s all about cold hard cash of course, and those stories in the press are preparing the ground and attempting with whatever means they have at their disposal to squeeze out the absolute maximum in what will certainly be a stratospheric new deal for the player who wants the next contract to give him the status he thinks he deserves as one of the top three players in the world.

I’m fairly confident that at the end of the day Neymar will put pen to paper, but mark my words, until he does we’re going to have some fun. Eat your heart out, Hollywood. Then the club are going to have to do it all again with Leo Messi.

https://uk.sports.yahoo.com/news/be...509.html?soc_src=mediacontentstory&soc_trk=tw
 

RedDevil@84

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Btw. Any deal with Neymar will involve 250 cups of coffee a setting up a lot of orgies for his mates and family :nono::nono::nono:

All in all it would take around a year to complete the deal :lol::lol::lol:
 

Rich_H_1989

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At least we can prepare ourselves for this one to run and run! I was fully prepared for the next bombshell which would be along the lines of "it's always been a dream of Neymar's to play for Manchester United". In fact I was just surprised we've not seen it yet.
 

Cloudface

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Not surprisingly therefore, Neymar’s people have already fired the first shots across the Barcelona bows helping offer to media the ‘revelation’ that Manchester United are interested in the player -maybe not for this summer though, or so the stories say. Why do they come out now?
It is all nonsense of course and certainly something that will have come as a bit of a surprise to United. Ed Woodward was in Barcelona for a short, slightly bizarre meeting a week ago, the main purpose of which seemed to be to express some interest in Pedro, but not with much enthusiasm. Perhaps he was trying to get the player’s price reduced or at least delay payment. It’s fair to assume that had they really wanted the player, a little more enthusiasm would not have gone amiss.

In the end they offered 28 plus two million, so when Chelsea came in and offered the full amount (27 plus 3), Pedro was left in no doubt just where he would be more appreciated.
Hmm. He knows nothing.
 

Summit

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Hmm. He knows nothing.
Shame DDG doesn't take this approach. It's bollocks anyway, just because the club haggles over a deal, does not mean for one minute that they don't want said player.
 

Di Maria's angel

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At least we can prepare ourselves for this one to run and run! I was fully prepared for the next bombshell which would be along the lines of "it's always been a dream of Neymar's to play for Manchester United". In fact I was just surprised we've not seen it yet.
“Since I was 13 or 14 years old, I’ve been telling my mother and my father that my dream is to play some day for Manchester United.

“And I won’t stop till I get it.

“When I watch [Wayne] Rooney and all of them on TV, I can’t wait to play there at Old Trafford.

“When I was a little boy I watched Arsenal games as well, but Manchester United always dazzled me most.”
 

Gopher Brown

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Hold the front page guys... my mate just spotted Neymar in Manchester, presumably on his way to his medical!

Good lad, down to earth, getting a bus to his medical. He'll fit right in with the rest of our humble multi-millionaires. I expect he can't wait to get down his local with Wazza for a couple of pints of bitter.
 

Rich_H_1989

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“Since I was 13 or 14 years old, I’ve been telling my mother and my father that my dream is to play some day for Manchester United.

“And I won’t stop till I get it.

“When I watch [Wayne] Rooney and all of them on TV, I can’t wait to play there at Old Trafford.

“When I was a little boy I watched Arsenal games as well, but Manchester United always dazzled me most.”
Those are exactly the kind of "quotes" I'm expecting over the coming weeks and months. We've seen it so many times before. A close family friend or a relative. Usually a twice removed cousin or something.
 

sun_tzu

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AbusementPark

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Those are exactly the kind of "quotes" I'm expecting over the coming weeks and months. We've seen it so many times before. A close family friend or a relative. Usually a twice removed cousin or something.
Worse thing is Barca said they will be discussing Neymars contract in a few months, I hope its before January or this story will keep its legs.
 

Rich_H_1989

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Worse thing is Barca said they will be discussing Neymars contract in a few months, I hope its before January or this story will keep its legs.
As Ballbag says in his article this one will run and run. Neymar has 3 years left on his contract and he's in no rush. Barca have time so they don't need to rush. And meanwhile the rumours will continue.

But you know what the worst thing is? We all know that this is nonsense. We know that he will sign a new deal with Barca unless something goes horribly wrong. But in a few months the rumours will move on to city or Chelsea... And people on here will go nuts and blame Woodward and LVG.
 

sunama

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Moby

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£182M?
I was sure I read a headline a few days ago that we are putting together a deal worth £240M.
£182M is a bargain.
:lol::lol: It's like someone buying a massively overpriced shirt because the tag says 25% discount and makes them think they are saving money.
 

Red-Jeff

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Guys this is literally starting to get embarrassing now.

It's like when you'd try to get with that girl at your college, who was always way out of your league, absoultely incredibly good looking and a great personality to go with it. And then for some reason she starts acting friendly towards you. You at first talk a bit in Sociology where you sit next to her and suddenly you're sending her a few texts. You think for some reason, who knows why looking back, but you think she actually might be interested. She invites you to go back to her house one day and she says she really likes you, but she's into some weird stuff. You start to get hopeful hoping she might actually like you and are interested in the stuff she's going to do. Next second she's blindfolding you and she starts to lick your balls. Next second you hear a lad laughing and it's her fecking built as feck boyfriend with a camera in his hand. You look down and see it's not her but her dog which is licking your balls, and fecking Mike has got it all on video. She comes out saying, "Sorry, it was just too funny" and you run away with tears streaming down your face. She ends up getting with Michael and they have a great life while you're known as "The Dog Whisperer" for the rest of your life.
I really hate when that happens! Almost as embarrassing as United fans
 

Blackwidow

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“Since I was 13 or 14 years old, I’ve been telling my mother and my father that my dream is to play some day for Manchester United.

“And I won’t stop till I get it.

“When I watch [Wayne] Rooney and all of them on TV, I can’t wait to play there at Old Trafford.

“When I was a little boy I watched Arsenal games as well, but Manchester United always dazzled me most.”
Take Schweinsteiger - as he has praised him already 2 or 3 years ago...

And they celebrated Schweinsteiger's 30th birthday together...

 

Blue always red

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Hypothetical question, if us, City, Chelsea, Bayern, PSG and Madrid went in for him, all offering him the same contract, who does he choose?
 

Rich_H_1989

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Hypothetical question, if us, City, Chelsea, Bayern, PSG and Madrid went in for him, all offering him the same contract, who does he choose?
Chelsea or PSG. I can't see him going to Real. I can't see the German league being really that attractive to him and Chelsea by then may have lost Hazard plus of course it's that London appeal.
 

Nighteyes

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Guys this is literally starting to get embarrassing now.

It's like when you'd try to get with that girl at your college, who was always way out of your league, absoultely incredibly good looking and a great personality to go with it. And then for some reason she starts acting friendly towards you. You at first talk a bit in Sociology where you sit next to her and suddenly you're sending her a few texts. You think for some reason, who knows why looking back, but you think she actually might be interested. She invites you to go back to her house one day and she says she really likes you, but she's into some weird stuff. You start to get hopeful hoping she might actually like you and are interested in the stuff she's going to do. Next second she's blindfolding you and she starts to lick your balls. Next second you hear a lad laughing and it's her fecking built as feck boyfriend with a camera in his hand. You look down and see it's not her but her dog which is licking your balls, and fecking Mike has got it all on video. She comes out saying, "Sorry, it was just too funny" and you run away with tears streaming down your face. She ends up getting with Michael and they have a great life while you're known as "The Dog Whisperer" for the rest of your life.
:lol:
 

K2K

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"Can Manchester United score? They always score"
Guys this is literally starting to get embarrassing now.

It's like when you'd try to get with that girl at your college, who was always way out of your league, absoultely incredibly good looking and a great personality to go with it. And then for some reason she starts acting friendly towards you. You at first talk a bit in Sociology where you sit next to her and suddenly you're sending her a few texts. You think for some reason, who knows why looking back, but you think she actually might be interested. She invites you to go back to her house one day and she says she really likes you, but she's into some weird stuff. You start to get hopeful hoping she might actually like you and are interested in the stuff she's going to do. Next second she's blindfolding you and she starts to lick your balls. Next second you hear a lad laughing and it's her fecking built as feck boyfriend with a camera in his hand. You look down and see it's not her but her dog which is licking your balls, and fecking Mike has got it all on video. She comes out saying, "Sorry, it was just too funny" and you run away with tears streaming down your face. She ends up getting with Michael and they have a great life while you're known as "The Dog Whisperer" for the rest of your life.
:lol: Personal experience?
 
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