I’m very happy for them to be doing well. It blows this ridiculous notion at Utd that we‘ve got shitty players and OGS has been dealt a bad hand and is therefore absolved of any blame for our underperformance in the league. Man for man on paper we’re much better than Sheff Utd but they’re ahead of us in reality.
Goalkeepers:
De Gea vs Henderson: De Gea is 29 and hasn't been our best player for 18 months. He's clearly done at the professional level. Henderson is younger and home grown. Henderson clearly better.
Defenders:
AWB vs Baldock: AWB cost 45m and hasn't scored a goal. Baldock did not cost 45m and has scored 2. Need I say more? Fine. AWB went outside London for the first time. He's basically a fledling that hasn't learned to fly yet. Baldock went on a loan in Iceland. That's an island so he had to fly to get there. Not only that he played for ÍBV which is in the Westman Islands so he had to fly to an island twice. That's twice as much as AWB (0x2=twice).
Shaw vs Stevens: Enda Stevens went straight from the Irish PL to the English PL and then down to L2 and then up to L1, Championship and back to the PL again. What does that remind you of? You are correct, the Rocky movies. Rocky is great,
Stevens is Rocky: Shaw is Rocky's uncle Paulie. His aspirations are to have sex with a robot. We need focused players. Stevens is clearly better.
Maguire vs O'Connell: O'Connell was born in Liverpool (best team in the country) and played for Blackburn (best in 1992), Brentford (best in Championship) and then Sheffield United (best in 2021). Maguire was born and bred at Sheffield United and they are better without him. Enough said.
Lindelöf vs Basham or Egan: Take your pick, Lindelöf won't be better. Shaped by Benfica which are infamous for never producing talent. No change there. Whilst Lindelöf escaped the Swedish climate for Benfica Basham (a born Geordie) decided to leave Newcastle to work at McDonald's to gain experience that professional footballers usually don't have. You can see the result on the pitch. Egan is a total mystery. There are hospital records of him being born in Cork but that's it. His opponents also can't figure him out which is why he dominates everyone on the pitch. Only a madman would pick Lindelöf over the mystery box.
Chemistry: Spain in goal, England-Sweden-England-England vs England in goal England-England-England-Ireland-Ireland. Everyone that has played ultimate team can see which team has the better chemistry. Solskjær even has Jones on the bench to fix the broken chemistry but decided on a Swede who doesn't even speak the language (Sweden has a notoriously poor public school system).
Midfield:
Fred vs Norwood: Norwood was HG at United. Fred wasn't so Norwood wins this one.
Pogba vs Ludstram: Pogba was HG at United, Ludstram wasn't. Always Pogba.
Lingard vs Fleck: This is a tough one. Lingard was HG at United but Fleck was a massive FM legend. FM legends are generally the best players in the world and we've all seen that Fleck is well on his way but Lingard stil edges it for me.
Chemistry: Again, what is Ole thinking? A Frenchman, Brazilian and Englishman? Wine drinker, coffee drinker and tea drinker. Thankfully Pogba did grow up here with Lingard and both of them have gotten a dance in Fifa which only the top players can but the chemistry still suffers. Meanwhile over at Sheffield there's a Scotsman, N-Irishman and Englishman. They were united in Brexit and they are Sheffield United on the pitch. Link well with the high chemistry defense. Superb managing there.
Attack:
Rashford vs McBurnie: Rashfors is United HG.
Martial vs Mousset: Martial is the choice here. Mousset is a record signing but he's not showing it on the pitch. Although he's an France U21 legend that's not his world anymore. It might have something to do with his nationality because he's the only reason why it's not a 100. Martial on the other hand is so god damn likeable. Even if he wasn't simply better you'd pick him because his jovial nature lightens the mood for everyone around him. He negates his chemistry deficient with his happy-go-lucky nature.
James vs Fleck: Fleck again? He's an FM legend. I can't have him lose. Besides I've already done 11 Sheffield players. James meanwhile was born in Hull but plays for Wales? How's that legal? Fleck is also 0.3cm taller.
Chemistry: Would have been about the same but for some reason James is Welsh. Mousset makes the whole team chemistry worse, maybe that's the reason Sheffield are 5th and not 3rd?
Overall: United get 4 picks and Sheffield United 8 when we tally up the scores. Better on paper, better in reality.
Also you're happy for them? You want Saudi owners? Do you hate women?