Works for the torries
Brexited | the worst threads live the longest
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In the latest episode of the United Hour Podcast, Nik @Rood and Imran @Annihilate Now! start with the good news by celebrating Manchester United Women's emphatic FA Cup win over Spurs at Wembley and the future of manager Marc Skinner.
Then it's the bad news and the ever worsening form of our Men with losses to Arsenal and Palace.
Finally the main debate - ETH Out now or keep him until the end of the season - if not longer. Are you Team Nik or Team Imran?
Then you point out the WA is leaving the EU and they say “oh not that kind of leaving”.
Green Party denies Sunday Times report of a pact with Rory Stewart
https://morningstaronline.co.uk/art...nday-times-report-of-a-pact-with-rory-stewart
https://morningstaronline.co.uk/art...nday-times-report-of-a-pact-with-rory-stewart
Do the greens poll strongly up there?
Plot Twist; the builder and benefit guy were the same person!
I assumed that the banker killed the benefits beneficiary and the builder buried him in some foundations in exchange of one of the biscuits.
I edited this so it made me feel better and ramped it up to the parody that it should be. That way I can pretend the original article is just one big joke from the Guardian and nobody really thinks this way.
Although not all the small towns and villages that make up the traditional Conservative constituency of Royston Vassey in south Cheshire are strangers to economic hardship, Tarapolygamous, at its heart, looks like a model railway with every stop being filled with trolls half the size and twice as fat as their Hobbit counterparts.
In normal times the Conservative Association, situated in a quaint "British only" gated community, would busy itself with events such as burlesque lunches with Edwina Currie – as happened earlier in the year to a sellout crowd of three. But these are not normal times. The local MP, Antoinette Sandbach, is one of the 21 “rebels” who have been expelled from the parliamentary party for understanding what democracy means. On Friday the association’s doors are locked, its blinds closed and its guard poodle has been forced to chow down on abandoned sardines and Bombay Bad Boy Pot Noodles.
If a kind of interspecies warfare has broken out within the Conservative party, then Royston Vassey Conservatives appear, in mafia parlance, to have gone to their mistress's homes to wait out the storm.
The only official who’ll speak is a councillor and former deputy chairman of the association, John Leather.
“I have literally no fecking clue what's going on,” he says, referring to the withdrawal of the whip from Sandbach and the other 20 Tory MPs.
Does he think it has damaged Boris Johnson, a man who had few qualms about voting against his predecessor Theresa May’s government?
“I can’t really give you a view on that,” he says, diplomatically. “but I'm going to anyway and say that we must, at all costs, defeat the giant lizard Jeremy Corbyn before he stomps over our town's award winning rose beds". Leather says he’s in favour of men marrying their cats, but that others in the locality may think differently.
They certainly do.
“They’re all traitors,” says 80-year-old Brian Gale, outside Ginger and Pickles tea rooms on the high street. “I’m pleased all of them were kicked out. Some of them were good MPs but they let the side down with their interspecies malarkey and pandering to political correctness.”
Those good MPs include the former chancellor Philip Hammond, father of the house and also a former chancellor Ken Clarke, and several other household names. Yet there seems to be precious little sympathy for these accomplished Tories, let alone the local MP, in this genteel English village.
A married couple, who ask for their names to be withheld because “it’s a small community and a contentious issue”, say that Sandbach has paid the price for going against her constituents – in the referendum Eddisbury was marginally in favour of Leave. Her more serious sin was more likely going against Johnson.
“She wanted a deal for leaving, which I understand,” says the husband. “But it didn’t say anything about that on the ballot paper.”
He’s a little troubled by the mention that most of the promises made by the Leave Campaign have turned out to be utter bullshit and that people were sold a lie, but he is defiant.
“I think what the country needs is some middle ground that everybody can agree on.” he says, unsure of how to answer and instead resorting to a response that adds nothing to the debate. What, then, had they thought about May’s withdrawal agreement, which, after all, was an attempt to find a middle way?
“Defeat Jeremy Corbyn before he tries to suck my brains through my nose with his tentacled arms” he says, no longer sounding in the mood for compromise.
Another couple, Diana and Peter Ouseley are, if anything, more strident. Diana describes the rebels as “despicable” and is happy that Sandbach, Clarke et al have been lined up against a wall and shot. She doesn't like that this is causing delays in removing EU nationals from the country, she says.
“These are the people I call black people,” says Peter. “I don’t like them.”
Most Conservative voters I speak to in Tarapolygamous express the belief that Johnson is doing a good job in difficult circumstances. The fact that he has forced out MPs for doing the same as he did, by voting against the government, is seen not as a sign of hypocrisy but rather as a mark of strength.
“Whether or not one understands what's going on,” says one, “maybe it’s the way forward. I don't know. DEFEAT JEREMY FECKING CORBYN"
Just two Tories veer from whole-hearted endorsement of Johnson. Mandy Nickson, a sweat shop owner, says it’s “all a mess”. She is keen for the country to get out of the EU but she’s ambivalent about the prime minister’s strategy.
Retired businesswoman Elizabeth Lindop is the sole voice of outright dissent. “It’s disgraceful that the MPs were expelled,” she says. She thinks the Conservatives, as she puts it, have shat the bed. “They don’t have enough MPs for a majority but it's never been their attitude to let facts get in the way of their delusion."
As a consequence, she says she will no longer vote Conservative, and will settle for a more liberal party like the BNP or Charlie and his Orchestra.
But the unavoidable fact remains that in places such as Tarapolygamous there is an increasingly desperate desire among many voters to leave the EU as soon as possible. Although few understand what it means, they shout alot and ignore anyone who tries to get them to calm down, put their shirts back on, and quietly leave the Masonic Lodge.
Among them there is a common belief that, once the UK is out of the EU, the UK will remain the fourth biggest economy in the world despite losing the trade agreement with our biggest buyer or services. But at the moment the rift both within the Tory party and the country at large feels too wide, and almost any resolution too divisive, for that to happen. As Lindop says: “Some say he comes out at nights and steals the ring around your arse. And he's using the rings to build a big arse stealing machine. And then he's going to steal everyone's arse and use them to build some sort of socialist country where people have to give up their arse rings to some nasty tyrant like Groucho Marx or Rita Repulsa from the Power Rangers. I don't know if it's true or not but I definitely don't want Jeremy Corbyn getting the slightest opportunity to take MY arse ring.”
And if the past week is anything to go by, they’re bound to get stranger.
In normal times the Conservative Association, situated in a quaint "British only" gated community, would busy itself with events such as burlesque lunches with Edwina Currie – as happened earlier in the year to a sellout crowd of three. But these are not normal times. The local MP, Antoinette Sandbach, is one of the 21 “rebels” who have been expelled from the parliamentary party for understanding what democracy means. On Friday the association’s doors are locked, its blinds closed and its guard poodle has been forced to chow down on abandoned sardines and Bombay Bad Boy Pot Noodles.
If a kind of interspecies warfare has broken out within the Conservative party, then Royston Vassey Conservatives appear, in mafia parlance, to have gone to their mistress's homes to wait out the storm.
The only official who’ll speak is a councillor and former deputy chairman of the association, John Leather.
“I have literally no fecking clue what's going on,” he says, referring to the withdrawal of the whip from Sandbach and the other 20 Tory MPs.
Does he think it has damaged Boris Johnson, a man who had few qualms about voting against his predecessor Theresa May’s government?
“I can’t really give you a view on that,” he says, diplomatically. “but I'm going to anyway and say that we must, at all costs, defeat the giant lizard Jeremy Corbyn before he stomps over our town's award winning rose beds". Leather says he’s in favour of men marrying their cats, but that others in the locality may think differently.
They certainly do.
“They’re all traitors,” says 80-year-old Brian Gale, outside Ginger and Pickles tea rooms on the high street. “I’m pleased all of them were kicked out. Some of them were good MPs but they let the side down with their interspecies malarkey and pandering to political correctness.”
Those good MPs include the former chancellor Philip Hammond, father of the house and also a former chancellor Ken Clarke, and several other household names. Yet there seems to be precious little sympathy for these accomplished Tories, let alone the local MP, in this genteel English village.
A married couple, who ask for their names to be withheld because “it’s a small community and a contentious issue”, say that Sandbach has paid the price for going against her constituents – in the referendum Eddisbury was marginally in favour of Leave. Her more serious sin was more likely going against Johnson.
“She wanted a deal for leaving, which I understand,” says the husband. “But it didn’t say anything about that on the ballot paper.”
He’s a little troubled by the mention that most of the promises made by the Leave Campaign have turned out to be utter bullshit and that people were sold a lie, but he is defiant.
“I think what the country needs is some middle ground that everybody can agree on.” he says, unsure of how to answer and instead resorting to a response that adds nothing to the debate. What, then, had they thought about May’s withdrawal agreement, which, after all, was an attempt to find a middle way?
“Defeat Jeremy Corbyn before he tries to suck my brains through my nose with his tentacled arms” he says, no longer sounding in the mood for compromise.
Another couple, Diana and Peter Ouseley are, if anything, more strident. Diana describes the rebels as “despicable” and is happy that Sandbach, Clarke et al have been lined up against a wall and shot. She doesn't like that this is causing delays in removing EU nationals from the country, she says.
“These are the people I call black people,” says Peter. “I don’t like them.”
Most Conservative voters I speak to in Tarapolygamous express the belief that Johnson is doing a good job in difficult circumstances. The fact that he has forced out MPs for doing the same as he did, by voting against the government, is seen not as a sign of hypocrisy but rather as a mark of strength.
“Whether or not one understands what's going on,” says one, “maybe it’s the way forward. I don't know. DEFEAT JEREMY FECKING CORBYN"
Just two Tories veer from whole-hearted endorsement of Johnson. Mandy Nickson, a sweat shop owner, says it’s “all a mess”. She is keen for the country to get out of the EU but she’s ambivalent about the prime minister’s strategy.
Retired businesswoman Elizabeth Lindop is the sole voice of outright dissent. “It’s disgraceful that the MPs were expelled,” she says. She thinks the Conservatives, as she puts it, have shat the bed. “They don’t have enough MPs for a majority but it's never been their attitude to let facts get in the way of their delusion."
As a consequence, she says she will no longer vote Conservative, and will settle for a more liberal party like the BNP or Charlie and his Orchestra.
But the unavoidable fact remains that in places such as Tarapolygamous there is an increasingly desperate desire among many voters to leave the EU as soon as possible. Although few understand what it means, they shout alot and ignore anyone who tries to get them to calm down, put their shirts back on, and quietly leave the Masonic Lodge.
Among them there is a common belief that, once the UK is out of the EU, the UK will remain the fourth biggest economy in the world despite losing the trade agreement with our biggest buyer or services. But at the moment the rift both within the Tory party and the country at large feels too wide, and almost any resolution too divisive, for that to happen. As Lindop says: “Some say he comes out at nights and steals the ring around your arse. And he's using the rings to build a big arse stealing machine. And then he's going to steal everyone's arse and use them to build some sort of socialist country where people have to give up their arse rings to some nasty tyrant like Groucho Marx or Rita Repulsa from the Power Rangers. I don't know if it's true or not but I definitely don't want Jeremy Corbyn getting the slightest opportunity to take MY arse ring.”
And if the past week is anything to go by, they’re bound to get stranger.
Seems government strategy is going to be to find a loophole / some legal cover to avoid asking for the extension
I can only assume this strategy has been decided on after receiving legal advice
I think I joked a few years ago brexit was going to end up decided in the European courts... It actually might at this rate
I can only assume this strategy has been decided on after receiving legal advice
I think I joked a few years ago brexit was going to end up decided in the European courts... It actually might at this rate
Yeah but but that's not leaving because they won't let us unless we resolve the border.....but Boris is doing a good job he's erm been shouty and stuff and will solve the border next anyway.
Can the executive just cancel an extension unilaterally? I feel like this has been discussed before and the answer is no but they clearly think they'll comply in law but not spirit.
Maybe they'll append the request with an unreasonable condition
If the banker knew that jet fuel can melt steel beams it means that they were in one of the twin towers on September 11th.
Damn you, Buster. Damn you for finding the single flaw in my point.
Not sure what they will do and of course it could be a bluff that if the opposition think the extension is not legally watertight they might be better off going for an early election?
Certainly sound like they will make a legal challenge to it though
(raab)
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.co.uk/news/amp/uk-politics-49625431
I can do what I like because you also did something else completely unrelated.
What a pathetic argument.
The difference is though that today’s pensioners grew up in a totally different environment to today’s youth.
Living through or shortly after world wars plus the Cold War is bound to have made them suspicious of foreigners
Pre-Internet, pre-Social media, pre-cheap global travel, pre the real boom of a globalised, partially homogenised culture etc....generally meant that their world view was always likely to be quite narrow in comparison to young people today
Also, people don’t get significantly more intelligent as they get older. So this notion that the elderly are somehow wiser is likely to be unsupported by any evidence at all, since modern populations generally get better educated with each generation
The above is what gives me hope for the future
No great musician ever wrote a good album over 50.
Apart from David Bowie. And he died for it.
Apart from David Bowie. And he died for it.
No, it shows that a Tory who voted to remain is still a Tory, with all the horrible views that entails.
Bruce Springsteen. And shut up...I know what you're coming back with.
I do not think even Boris believes half of the stuff he spouts. He couldn't care less if the UK was in the EU or not so long as he gets to be PM. But now he has been boxed into a corner by Cummings and Mogg and needs saving. It it is utterly ridiculous to try to get a vote of no confidence by the government against the government. That seems to be the only choice for him as I am sure he is not going to commit suicide in a ditch.
Gove has got to be sharpening some knives. It will be interesting to see if he tries to keep some distance from Boris in the coming days.
You are most welcome my friend.
Seems the pact with the brexit party is starting to take shape
https://www.thetimes.co.uk/edition/...rity-of-100-mps-in-general-election-xtt3sgxv5
https://www.thetimes.co.uk/edition/...rity-of-100-mps-in-general-election-xtt3sgxv5
What was the point?! I’m lost
Springsteen never wrote a good album.
Now you've put @Mockney firmly on my side.
Oh you poor sod, please take a seat. No, not that one. That one. THAT ONE. That's right, the beanbag.What was the point?! I’m lost
Now - please look at the presentation and not directly at me. STOP IT. Good. Now, my name is M.R. P.I.G.E.O.N. and if there's one thing that's certain about this universe it's that I usually have very little to add to the conversations other than keep comment numbers up. Understand now?
Good. Now please give me ten pounds and leave.
Guardain said:
Jeezuz...this from Sky:
Seems to have had a bit of a surge .Gaining three Councillor seats for the first time in the local elections.
We found the Boris Johnson account on Redcafe! Perfect amount of cogency and negotiating skill combined.
They sentenced me to twenty years of boredom for trying to change the system from within.
Because the WA proposed was fecking awful, how is this complicated for you to grasp?
Because the EU don't give a feck if we leave with a deal or not, they are happy to just say bye at this point.
Imagine if your kid said he's going to threaten you with not eating his chocolate in order to get better chocolate, you'd laugh in his face and say ok good luck.
Dickhead Dom mustve been watching House of Cards
I'd say that it'll be interesting to see how they spin that one but, to be honest, they won't lose any votes for it even if they turned up in clown costumes and said "to hell with democracy, all hail your new Emperor BoJo."
They've tried that, chief.
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