RAWK Goes into Meltdown 2014/2015 - The "We go again" Edition

thelemon

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Probably flocking to Anfield akin to religious freaks flocking to locations where a Jesus or Virgin Mary apparition appear.


Six hours ago today, the Saint Rafa Benitez appeared for three professional footballers in a West Derby park bush, prompting tens of thousands of pilgrimages.

The footballers had completed their training session at Melwood training ground, and decided to take a walk outside the perimeter. On the northwest perimeter of Melwood, the great Steven Gerrard, the almost world class Lucas Leiva, and the ever-fouling Martin Skrtel, all senior players, saw a vision of Rafa in a blue veil and white gown, Liverpool Echo reports.

Their claim sent 70,000 fans and RAWKites to the site within minutes. Many visitors said they felt a breeze and the scent of Spanish food coming from the bush, while others said the bush had healing powers. Meanwhile, some skeptics claimed the whole thing was a "mass hallucination," the paper reported. It was rumored Sir Alex Ferguson and the FA may have duped the club once again.

Rumor had it that Rafa's visage will appear again on Dec 5th. The bush has been adorned with rosaries, prayer cards, hubcaps, and numerous items bearing Rafa's face. The crowd began to dwindle shortly after a rash of vandalism and reports of stolen vehicles, but the bush -- and a wooden Mickey Mouse cup -- still stand at the site today.
Go on Studgie lad, them Manchesters sabotaging your food is bang out of order, I'm not fockin' 'avin that, it's bang out of order, this was our year.....
Just been musing that since Liverpool last won the League, I have become a father, and now a grandfather.
Adjusting for Merseyside teen pregnancy rates, we can't be that far off a scouse, great-grandfather wrapping his grandchild's offspring in his trackiee top, explaining how "Injury to the nearly world-class Lucas, has been the greatest barrier to glory since the corrupt FA banned the back-pass!"
:lol:
 

thegregster

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Just been musing that since Liverpool last won the League, I have become a father, and now a grandfather.
Adjusting for Merseyside teen pregnancy rates, we can't be that far off a scouse, great-grandfather wrapping his grandchild's offspring in his trackiee top, explaining how "Injury to the nearly world-class Lucas, has been the greatest barrier to glory since the corrupt FA banned the back-pass!"
:lol:
 

Phurry

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RAWKites really don't do themselves any favours when it comes to us stereotyping them...

deluded dipper said:
boss post mate
Although he does appear to have messed the "la" off the end to be fair to him.
 

montpelier

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Oct 24, 2011
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with edit of neater format for full appreciation

(I suspect he may be an ironic disloyal whopper who should be banned)

THE BOOK OF THE GOLDEN SKY 1

The Goal

1 In the beginning, there was a City named Liverpool.

2
Now the City was lightless and dark, save for a beacon of shining light in the form of a football club that took the City's name.

3 And it so transpired that the nets in the goals were not red.

4
And the creators of the Universe, the paymasters of the inhabits of this Golden Club, the saviours of its existence, said "Let the Nets be Red", and the Nets were Red.

5
FSG saw that the nets being red were good, and thenceforth the nets were red.

6 And FSG said, "Let there be a guardian of the Nets to separate the Ball from the goal".

7
And the God-King Brendan, who had succeeded the God-King Kenny, looked at the incumbent guardian, Pepe son of Miguel, and found that he was a heathen.

8 And the God-King Brendan turned to his disciple Simon son of Stefan, and said to him "You are a fantastic example of Belgian Engineering and Stoicity, and I will buy you for 9 million pounds".

9
And so the deed was done, and the God-King Brendan assayed to the world that Simon son of Stefan was "one of the top goalkeepers in the Premier League".

10 And the High Priest and Adherents of the Liverpool Faith at RAWK were happy.

11 And the God-King Brendan saw the unceasing efforts that Simon son of Stefan made in his duties as the custodian of the Nets, and he was very good.

12
And so the God-King Brendan found out that 9 million pounds was a fantastic bargain for an excellent shot stopper and a top, top example of Belgian Engineering and Stoicity.

13
And the God-King Brendan looked up at the firmament and thanked the legendary God-Kings, Shanks and Paisley, and thanked Fowler, and they blessed him.

14 And so Simon son of Stefan became another shining light in the constellation that is the Club of Liverpool.

15
And there is still a Golden Sky.
 
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Zoo

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The Man Himself

asked for a tagline change and all I got was this.
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Quality, but less funny when:

Rojo has the most appearances as CB in MUFC this season and he has dislocated shoulder since start of November and didn't have work permit until half of September.
One is about appearances other is about performances. Less appearances of others at us are linked to injuries. Those 3 there who haven't been scoring have not been injured all the while when Sturridge has been.
 

Ryan7

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Mar 6, 2013
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RAWK Mod: 'you don't post during the game. You watch the game. Been the case for years.'

So why have the thread open? :lol: